Dear Mammas, I need your input...from your experience, how do you keep your fears and worries in check when your child falls, especially on hisface. My LO took his first face first tumble today (at the playground). I held him, kissed him and told him everything was OK, plastering a smile on my face. I later washed his face and put neosporin on the scratch, but after I put him to bed, I was a bit shaken and upset with myself for letting this happen, although I know this will be the first of many such falls and bumps.
Thank you in advance for any input/advice/tips...
Thank you for all the advice and good momma tips, as well as support.
Be watchful of any serious dangers and then just relax. Children need to explore and need to find out what their limits are. Falling is part of it.
I know how you feel! It's so hard when they fall. My son tripped on a Lego, hit the wall with his head and I heard a splintering sound--I was SURE it was his skull. The screaming didn't quite match the noise I heard--turns out his head cracked the drywall. I thought I was going to die. He was fine. All I can tell you is that it happens. The more upset YOU become, the more it upsets them. Even if you're driving to the ER for stitches, TRY to keep composure. You can have a nervous breakdown after they are in bed. That's what I do! LOL
In my household, we have a theory that if you don't fall down, you're not playing hard enough. =)
We actually got some great advice from my older daughter's preschool. Never lift a child up onto monkey bars, the slide, etc. If they can get up there by themselves, let them have at it - they are coordinated enough to get up that high, so it will be safe enough for them. If they don't have the coordination to climb up, then it's likely they can fall and hurt themselves. Basically, if they only go as big and as high as they are comfortable with, everything will be fine.
Other than that, I let my kids have at it. Exploration and play is good for them. My younger daughter does some things that make me almost have a heart attack (I swear the kid will be in Cirque de Soleil someday, she is quite the acrobat and totally fearless) - but surprisingly, she has never broken any bones and rarely ever even gets bruised. Even though her limits scare me, she seems to know what she can handle!
Relax and enjoy, mama. And keep some frozen peas in your freezer - they're great to use as ice packs on bumps and bruises. ;-)
As a mother to three boys my word of advice would be the following. Don't make a big deal of it, the bigger a deal of it you make the more upset your little one will be. Don't ask him if he is ok, turn and look at him and tell him your okay let's go play. You'll find that he will brush himself off and start to get over things faster and be a happy little man.
Good luck!
S.
I say "uh-oh spaghetttios" or "up-si-daisy" and tell my 22 month old son to shake it off. He rarely cries now when he falls. If he smashes his finger or toe, he has now learned to come get a kiss from mom and then he runs off again. Very cute. He's bit his lips twice now, and it bleeds like crazy. But I just hug him and put a cool damp cloth to his lips and then distract him with something else. Last time, he wanted to go back outside and play while I wanted to hug on him some more. If I were you, don't worry, don't get all upset. It happens and will happen whether you're watching him 24/7 or not. Don't be upset with yourself. You cannot be SuperMom. And your son needs to learn to cope and console himself too, so an occasional bump or fall won't be bad.
when my son first fell, I considered taking him to the hospital. So, no you're not verreacting, you're just being a mom. But I think what you did is perfect. Acting like it is no big deal & that's what he'll think too. You don't want to make him think the world is full of horrible things that could happen to him (i see this almost every day at the playground, etc). You just have to convince yourself that he's gonna live & be just fine & probably even better if he does fall here & there. You shouldn't let him play with fire, but I think if he's trying to climb something & may get alittle banged up, let him, he'll learn (and you'll cringe alittle, but you'll be okay too).
I figure if my child is fine and ready to play within a minute or two he is fine. To be honest, my kids are clumsy and fall CONSTANTLY especially when tired. People who get upset like you do usually just have coordinated kids and are not used to seeing falls. It happens here at least 10 times a day with varying degrees of how bad it looks so I've gotten used to it. Really unless the cut bleeds I don't even worry about cleaning it.
i think you handled it great. my first moment like this came when my son was just a week or two old - he used to LOVE to suck on my pinkie, it was one of his soothing methods (he later turned into a thumb-sucker, go figure), well he did one of those great infant head-bobs, at just the wrong moment, and cut his lip pretty badly on my fingernail, it bled and bled and i was horrified. how could i do this to my child!?!? all i can tell you is that they DO get hurt, and it DOES get easier. keeping it in check until you were alone was great. just keep in mind that (while face-plants are some of the scarier falls) they are mostly rubber at this age and it is amazing what they can survive with very little trauma. my son is three now, and my biggest fear is when he is crying so hard he doesn't breathe - once he takes that breath and the screams start, i feel better! lol! if you stay calm you'll see he gets over it relatively quickly and all is right with the world again.
Yeah, the first couple times I'm pretty sure it hurts us more than them. :)
When it is a small fall just help him up with a big smile. Laugh about the fall. We are all clumsy, right?? If it is a big fall cuddle him and let him know you are concerned but glad he is alright. Tell him about all the stuff you are doing that makes it all better (washing, bandaid, etc). Keep a strong face. Even though you want to cry inside, show him you are strong and that falls happen. The biggest thing you want him to feel when you pick him up is safety. If you're hysterical he isn't going to feel safe. So save the OMG moment for when you are alone. :)
I just always ask my son if he is OK and then don't make a big deal of it. I just dust him off and let him keep playing. I always watch for signs of concussion like dilated pupils, super sleepy after the fall etc. You can get online if you want to know exactly what to look for. Most falls are just a part of life. Mine has had some pretty bad spills only to look at me and say "I OK mommy" and rush off before I even have the chance to dust him off! I try not to react at all when he does fall and just keep a really cool head and check him out, that way if he is fine I don't freak him out. If they are hurt they will cry and let you know, so I would rather not make him fearful of anything. Best wishes, it is really hard the first time around, but they get so independent so fast and want to conquer the world(especially boys!) so a few tumbles are bound to happen. Hang in there mama!!
