What Do You Do When You Have Had Enough?

Updated on December 12, 2010
C.R. asks from Olathe, KS
19 answers

Okay, today had to be the worst day I've had since becoming a stay at home mom two years ago! I have had it with poopy pants, overflowing toilets, and toilet paper being wasted. All I have done today is deal with poopy accidents with my three year old and four year old daughters. My four year old is complete accidents and I understand that, but my three year old is just plain stubborn about not pooping in the potty. I am trying to stay calm, but the fact that my three old decided to put an entire roll of toilet paper into the toilet is not helping me. What would you do to calm yourself down? Today seems like one of those days where I am just mad at my kids. I'm so frustrated and I can't stand it when I have days like this. They have been great, but the bathroom issues are becoming way to much for me to deal with. I have totally had it today!

What can I do next?

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J.K.

answers from Phoenix on

You need a break. Go out for coffee with a friend or something. That makes all the difference in the world!

3 moms found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

I suddenly find a ton of errands that need to be run. I don't do it terribly often, but occasionally...I have dinner ready, kiss the kiddos and the hubby and I leave. Walmart when you are running away from home can be bliss. And since the bedtime routine can be pretty hectic, I usually manage to stay out until 8:30, when I know they will be in bed. Fortunately my hubby gets it and lets me get away when I need it.

2 moms found this helpful

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M.W.

answers from Boise on

Sometimes when I feel like running away screaming down the road (I don't actually do that), after they are in bed and asleep, I just quietly look at their cute little faces. And also I get on the computer and look at old baby photos of them because they are sooo adorable, and it softens my grumpy, impatient heart.

Another suggestion I have heard, that I tried a few times, was when you are soooo mad over a disgusting mess, take out your camera and take a picture of the mess so that a year from now, you can laugh at it. I heard of a mom with a photo album of naughty messes. I took a picture of chocolate quik all over the kitchen floor mixed with spaghetti noodles and peeled, smooshed bananas all over the floor. I also have a pic of an entire bag of cereal all over my daughters bedroom floor. . .

8 moms found this helpful

C.R.

answers from Dallas on

Plan a night out soon with the girls and have some serious decompression time and realized you life is not so different or even better than most. lol
And for relief for the moment I usually make a visit to my car in the garage and have a good talk/cry with God. Honest, I do. Yelling and all sometimes, Ha.
Sorry about your day and please realize your not alone. We all have those days.
C.

6 moms found this helpful
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H.W.

answers from Portland on

I don't have a blanket answer but take a break if you can, pour yourself a cup of tea or a glass of wine. THEN, go into the bathroom. Take the TP off the holder, tear off several strips about 4 squares long, and put them in a basket or on a stool near the toilet. ONLY OFFER THESE to your kids! and keep the rest of the roll up out of reach. Yes, you will have to go in and replace these, but it will be worth it until your daughter has some self-restraint. And, also, you can teach them what my mom taught my brother after numerous overflows/clogs/grossness: wipe three times, then flush. You can wipe more if you need to, but three times per flush. This will help, as kids can count to three at this age!

It's okay to be mad every once in a while with our kids. I loved one of your last lines "They have been great, but the bathroom issues are becoming way to much for me to deal with." You're an awesome mom with a healthy perspective on it--IMO, you are way ahead of the game just in that statement. And your 3 year old will figure it out about the poop; it's a common challenge for these little ones. Hang in there!

3 moms found this helpful
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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I laugh--- Even if I am mad as hell, I laugh, I make myself laugh and that breaks up the mood. Hang in there, remember you only have to get through today and then tomorrow will take care of itself.

Molly

2 moms found this helpful
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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

I go on time out. Typically for at least 20-30 minutes. My son (depending on why I'm losing my temper / sense of wah) is either allowed to play/watch a movie/etc or is confined to his room until I'm calm enough to deal with him.

Personally, my favorite timeout spot is my front porch. I sit, drink a coke, and write/ read/ watch a movie on my laptop for a bit... and do NOTHING except for calm down doing something I enjoy.

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

.

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R.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

Take a deep breath.....and PRAY! Could your husband or someone else trustworthy watch your kids for an hour or two? Maybe you could take a bath, read a book, or go for a walk. Physical activity always helps me clear my mind. (and normally, I do NOT enjoy exercise.) Pray and ask God for some peace of mind and clarity. He will give it to you. Drop everything and play a silly game with your kids. Go outside for a while. Pet the cat/dog. I have not potty trained yet so I don't know any good answers to that. Wait til your kids are asleep and watch them sleep for a while. Think about the good happy times with them. Listening to my daughter breathe in her sleep always puts me in a peaceful mood. I hope this helps! I will pray for you as well. :)

2 moms found this helpful
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D.S.

answers from Tulsa on

you need me time leave hubby with the kids and just go play for awhile shoppng or something.

2 moms found this helpful
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A.W.

answers from Washington DC on

I've only had one go through potty training. I used a Sesame St potty training sticker poster along with a treat. At first, for poop, she got the big sticker and a small candy like two skittles. This worked well for her since she loved both stickers and candy. The best thing is to not react to the accidents and if you think they're doing it on purpose you could have them help you clean it up.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.S.

answers from Detroit on

make sure your eating healthy lots of protein and take extra b vitamins . this is a stressful time of year. Solary super stress is great. My Doctor had me take those and get 1 gram of b's a day. Yes that is alot, but boy oh boy it really helps. Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful

K.N.

answers from Austin on

Is it possible your 3 yo is seeking attention from you through negative behavior? Maybe she needs some 1-on-1, positive time with you to help mitigate her stubborn streak?

1 mom found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

It's time for them to go to preschool!

1 mom found this helpful
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H.W.

answers from San Francisco on

Fake it 'till ya make it...when I have those moments, where I want to *scream* at them, I will force myself to say "I love you" instead. Usually they will mimic my tone and growl back at me "I love you too!" It always at least elicits a smile and softens my heart just enough :)
That- and girls nights!

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A.R.

answers from Kansas City on

I totally agree with what SB said - hand the little darlings over to hubby when he gets home and leave for a couple of hours. Do your grocery shopping, take a book/laptop to a coffee shop and relax/hang out, finish up any Christmas shopping or just drive around and look at the pretty lights. You'll come home a little more refreshed/less stressed/angry and if the kids are in bed, then you can start with a clean slate in the morning.

And if that doesn't work, just remember - they're only little once and someday (ok, maybe a LONG time from now, but still) you'll look back and smile thinking what a giant pain the @#$ they were but how great they've turned out. LOL

A.G.

answers from Houston on

awwwwww, get some reinforcements, go get a massage, or a pedicure, or have someone ELSE dye your hair, or just go on a shopping spree at victorias secret or the dollar store, do somthing you like without the kids or just one of them(the calmest one) and start all over again tomorrow...........revived

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T.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Totally feel for you! I try to look at things from a different perspective and be thankful that I have children to be mad at (I have friends who have struggled for years and still no kids); that I have a house to take care of and clean up; that I am the one dealing with these issues and not some daycare worker or babysitter; that wasted toilet paper is my biggest concern for the day, etc. It takes practice to keep this perspective, and sometimes an extra-long trip to the bathroom to calm down, but I have found it incredibly freeing from frustrations to find thanks in any situation that is upsetting and frustrating. Best of luck, and you're not alone!

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