Would You Consider This Potty Trained?

Updated on September 03, 2011
D.F. asks from Saint Peters, MO
21 answers

If a child can stand at the toilet and go, but NEVER comunicates his needs to go. I have to ask him or tell him it's time to go potty. Still poops in his pants and when asked "Are you Poopy." replies NO even though he is. If I catch him trying to go and put him on the toilet he kicks and screams. He will wet himself and tell you he's not wet. He will be 3 at the end of the year. Do you consider this potty trained or am I the one who is trained to take him. Just wondering I've trained numerous children and never come across this situation. Just wondered what some other Mamas have to say.

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answers from Toledo on

No this is not potty trained. Potty trained IMO is when they tell you they need to go, or just go, and aside from occasional accidents use the potty for both pee and poop.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from St. Louis on

No. I don't consider a child potty trained until they no longer go in their pants and will tell you when they need to go and go on the potty. JMO.

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers


answers from Norfolk on

He's not there yet.
Some kids train later than others.
Put him back in diapers and take a break for a few months before you tray again.
My son just wasn't ready till he was just over 3, and by 3 1/2 he was day trained - hardly ever had any accidents.
He would tell me when he had to go.
He didn't like making mistakes (hated feeling wet/poopy).
He WANTED to use the potty - he didn't fight me over it.
He stayed in pull ups at night till he was 7 (was when he woke up dry for 14 days in a row).
Night trained and day trained are not the same thing.
Some kids wet the bed till they are 10 or 11 - their bladder just isn't mature till then.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Detroit on

Sorry no. Sounds like he just isn't ready yet. Some are ready sooner than others. My first trained at 2 took about a month my boys right after they turned three and my last was almost 3 1/2. every child is different give it a little rest then try again so it doesn't seem like a battle every time he has to go.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

he is not yet trained. To me trained is can use the toilet as an adult would with little to no accidents. Day and night.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Jacksonville on

Nope. If he doesn't initiate in any way, and kicks and screams at the toilet, then NO. Not potty trained. He should be recognizing the urges to go and TRYING to get there (and usually making it barring difficult or unusual circumstances) with little (if any) assistance from you. Otherwise, YOU are doing it and he is not trained.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Detroit on

Nope. Potty trained means I can take him out in public for the day with underwear and not have to worry about accidents. That what it means to me anyways.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Cleveland on

Yeah, I'd have to say you're the one who is trained! : )

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

Nope...It won't be long though :) He's working on it, and I would avoid the kicking and screaming. He's just not ready for the poopy part. However, what I did when potty training my youngest child, is to change the soiled pants, then show it to her and tell her that it belongs in the potty (toilet). I would then respectfully invite her to join me in the bathroom to flush it away. I kept everything very positive and never, ever, scolded her for wetting or soiling herself...even when I thought it was intintional. This took about 3 weeks of consistant "education" and praise to work....and she was my stubborn one when it came to potty training. Good luck! :)

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Kalamazoo on

NO - he's not got it yet.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Pittsburgh on

I would say "no" to the question "is he potty trained" but potty training is a process. It takes time. It takes even more time if you start training before they are ready...
But even trained kids DO need to be reminded to stop what (fun thing) they are doing & go to the bathroom.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Miami on

No, it's not. I just started training my son last week and started the week using a timer and making him go every 15-30 minutes. When he was still dependent on the timer, I would not have considered him trained. Now, he tells me when he needs to go (most of the time, he's still having some accidents, especially when he's distracted). The poop is definitely harder than the pee. He stood right next to me today and was pooping in his underwear. I caught him and took him to the toilet. He has the ability to do both (he had no accidents all weekend, telling us when he needed to go), but he's very stubborn and has had a couple of days where he will tell me he doesn't want to use the toilet. But, he is 3 years and 3 months and I'm not giving him that option anymore. He's capable when he wants to, so I have to figure out the right incentive for him to want to keep doing it. You may just need to give it more time. Boys sometimes aren't ready before 3 (and sometimes not after either...ugh!). Good luck!


answers from Austin on

Potty trained is when he goes on his own every time and no accidents even at night.

He may say, I need to go and then wants you to be there with him, but he is not needing to be reminded or placed on the toilet. .



answers from Washington DC on

I think at this point it's a control thing and he's winning. I would not consider this trained. This is where my DD is at. She will sometimes go to the potty on her own or sit when told but often if you ask her if she's wet she'll deny it.



answers from Albuquerque on

Nope, not potty trained. Sorry! But hang in there... it will happen.



answers from Dallas on

Reminders are fine but if he never tells you he needs to go, he is nowhere near trained.


answers from Kansas City on

NO, he's not potty trained. You can set the timer for 15-20 min. and remind him, take him even if he says he doesn't have to go, and do this until he will tell you or go on his own. Potty trained is no accidents and going all the time. Maybe you should wait a few months to start and be consistent then. Once you start though don't stop and start or he'll be confused as to when he has to 'really' do it. Do not use pull ups, put on underwear and then when he doesn't have accidents you are finished. :-) I usually took a potty in my car, am I the only one whose done this?, and if out the kids would use that much better than dirty public restrooms. You might try that in the beginning once he is ready to even go out in public.


answers from Los Angeles on

No, i would say he's not potty trained. That will come when he goes on his own without you taking him or reminding him.


answers from Iowa City on

No way. To me a potty trained child is one who goes as needed without being prompted. That is not to say you won't notice them wiggling around from time to time putting off going to the bathroom because an especially interesting Dora is on or that you won't have to remind them to go before leaving the house but if there are frequent accidents and no intention of making it to the potty on his own then I would say he is training but not fully there yet.


answers from Dover on

No, that is not potty trained. Potty trained is knowing he has to go and either going or at least telling you he has to go, and then actually going in the toilet. Potty trained children may have an occassional accident but when they don't "poop in his pants" or "wet himself" and tell you he's not poopy or wet. He may be aware that he has to go but trying exercise control and therefore not going to the potty but all evidence points to "not trained".

My son was basically potty trained but if he was playing, he would not stop to go potty and then hated it when you realized he needed to be changed because he had to stop playing. He knew what he was doing but still wasn't really potty trained because he wasn't going potty when he needed to.



answers from Kansas City on

This is not really an answer, but I personally think early potty training is all about the parent being trained, I mean really, we're just trained in something different, not changing diapers but getting the kid to the potty at appropriate times. You've got a ways to go, but this doesn't sound crazy.

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