Should Twins Be in Different Classes

I have two and a half year old boy/girl twins and I'm not ready to separate them just yet. I think that until they get to be alittle older, they need to be with each other to give comfort to each other. Even at this young of an age, they still have their own personalities and all that. I think that they will let you know when they are ready to be separated. Right now, they are each other's best friend.

Hi J.

I was told by our pediatrician that it is best to separate twins in different classes just so they develop their own personalities separate from the other twin. He had given me an example of twins in their 20s, boy girl, how they grew up while the girl had all the personality while the brotehr remained in her shadow even as adults. well, i tried that for my girls, and after a few days i was told by teachers that all my girls did was cry asking for her sister. and their rooms were close to one another so they heard each other cry and would cry more. so i put them in the same class. they are doing much better now
good luck
V.

If they are going to preschool, I don't see why they should be separated. When my twin girls where in pre-school they were together the whole time in the same area. They did tend to seek each other out but did play and interact with the other children. Once they started kindergarden in the public school system they were in separate clases. I belleve that is their rule. They are fifteen now and they have their own personalities but spend all time outside of school together. Occasionally one will be playing video games and the other reading but eventuallu they get back together. We tried separate bedrooms but I found them in the same bed in the morning. Now they have a bedroom and a "music" room. They are twins and have a special bond especially since they are both girls. I think it's very different with faternal twins of different genders or even of the same gender. My nieces are faternal twins, 26 years old now, and one is more dominant and the other passive. Anyway, I hope this helps.

I think you should ask them what they want and give them the choice. That way they don't feel it's anything they have done if they get separated and didn't want to be. I see nothing wrong with keeping them together, just as keeping any siblings together, whether twins or not. But it might make them feel good and empowered to help make the decision.

Hello J., I believe that although they are twins they are thier own person. I feel you should talk to them and explain what is happening and see waht they say. Make the judgement based on thier answers. Good Luck and bless your family.

Hello J.
I have four boys and a daughter..my twins are 12. The one thing I"ve never understood is how someone can separate twins. Especially is you aren't a twin and don't have a clue as to the depth of their bond. The public school system...most...will fight you on it...quoting "social" development...of which is NOT their responsibility. THey are to educate your chidren..you are to develop them socially. My kids were "experiments" for each school....the Principal having NEVER had twins in the same class room. So they were studied by all...and of course...proved all their theories FALSE. The only reason for separating...in my book...is if it's to one of the kids detriment...meaning, one NEEDS the other's skills to survive...then intervention is necessary. Our kids are closer than two coats of paint and when they are ready to be separate or apart...they'll be sure to let me know..they still crawl in bed together...as teens!!! Go figure. So I am one to say DO NOT separate and allow that bond to be a confidence booster and tremendous gift and blessing in their life...one of which is wish we ALL had!!! Don't make decsions based on individual ignorances. Use their uniqueness to your benefit...you'll be so thankful you did...and don't allow the school system to dictate your values or morals or standards!!!

God Bless!

I personally, believe that twins or even siblings who are very close in age, should be seperated. This should start an a much earlier age. This way, they develope thier own style, personality, they are able to think on their own without the other one. Like you are doing right now, have a family member take one of the children for the day, while another family member take the other one. This way, they will be ready for the seperation once they start attending school and won't go through the seperation anxiety.
Once in school, they will have thier own friends, they will excell in the subject of their choosing and the teachers won't have a problem.
If the boys are always together day and night, how will they be able to function as adults as seperate individuals?
Also with you being the ADULT, you shouldn't HAVE to ask your boys permission to put them in seperate classes. You shouldn't have to explain to them why it is being done. They are too young to making these types of decissions, they will not fully understand the whole concept. The decission should be yours and yours alone.

I would say trust your instincts. I would probably not separate my twins at this age. I would play it by ear. My husband and I do errands with one of our twins to give them mini separation experiences. My friend requested her twins be together in kindergarten and separated them in 1st grade. My sister did this with her twins as well. Although it did present some difficulties when one of the kids classes had lots of birthday parties that year and was hard for the other twin. They got through it though.

On paper, it sounds good to separate them, but in real life I think each family needs to make that decision for themselves.

LaurieK
www.mymonavie.com/LaurieK

yes they should to be there own individule

Pediatrician's advice or not, twins are separate individuals. They have needs that cannot be generalized any more than you can generalize whether any other child would thrive in this situation or that.

My twins are 7, they've been in the same class (preschool) and have been in separate classes for kindergarten and first grade. They have done great in both situations.

They have made friends individually, and they have mutual friends. Most of the kids at their school know that they are twins and invite both even though they are in separate classes.

As their mother, you know most intimately what each child needs. I have always made the point to treat mine as individuals - We decided not to give them cutesy twinsy names, I dressed them differently, I make them each a cake for their birthday, I take turns taking one on errands with me - and it still doesn't diminish the special bond that they share. They still change beds in the middle of the night to sleep with each other.

Oh, and eventually, you will hear from one or both that the other 'bothers' them.