Optional Room Sharing for Siblings - Yes or No?

I just did this when I had baby three. My oldest is a horrible sleeper, my second? When tired, he climbs in bed and sleeps. We bought bunks, and after two nights of the oldest keeping the youngest up, we gave the oldest a reading light. We then gave her 15 minutes with her special light. After that, the kids both slept great. In fact, the oldest sleeps better because she hates to be alone! She loves having a roommate.

Just let them share. It can work out wonderfully. In fact, we are looking for a new house and my oldest doesn't want her own room.

My kids love sharing a room, and even though they both have their own rooms now, they still sleep together every night. Just try it out for a few nights before baby comes and see how it goes.

I think I would try it and see how it goes. My sisters and I all slept in one room for a long time (there are 3 of us born within 4 years).

If you don't have to then don't have them share.
I shared a room with my sister till I was in the 4th grade.
Then I revolted, took my sleeping bag and slept in the play room on the floor for 2 weeks before my Mom believed that I REALLY didn't want to share a room anymore.
It's good to have your own space especially when you need to get away from everyone else.

Why, if you do have enough rooms for each kid to have their own, are you wanting to put 2 of the kids in the same room?
Since you do not HAVE, to?
If you don't have to, I wouldn't.
Leave things as they are.

All I know is, when I was a kid, I shared a room with my sibling who is only 2 years older.
I HATED HATED HATED HATED HATED, it.
We are of two different personalities, and had 2 entirely different sleep habits and routines, and it was just oil and water. And I just could not stand it.
So FINALLY, my parents put us in our own, separate, rooms.
And then, it was much more peaceful and I got sleep...AND it was also the only time, I did not have to be around my sibling. I got my own "me" time, when I was in my own room and able to do what I wanted and my own space to do so.

Doing a little remodeling, of the last room, to me, just has to be done no matter what. If not now...then you'd have to do it later, anyway.
So just do it now.
And most times, when someone thinks that "later" it will get done... well, through procrastination, it may not get done.

The "idea" of the kids sharing a room, may sound idyllic.
But it is not always.
Unless you HAVE to, combine them in a room, I would not.

Because of your 4 year olds sleep issues, I would not have them share a room if you can avoid it.

Do you have an aero bed? If so try it for a week before deciding. When my oldest was 4 and I was pregnant with my 3rd he went through a horrible I'm scared I don't want to sleep alone period. We wouldn't cave and let him in our room in part because of the new baby we knew was coming. One night I asked him what if you sleep with your little brother. He loved the idea and we gave him a 1 week trial period on an aero bed. He knew if he cried, woke his brother or caused any problems the he would be back in his own room. It went great and they shared a room for years with no issue.

You never know unless you try!

I shared a room and hated it more than anything else. There was no bonding. It was get the heck out of my way yet there was nowhere to go.
Since you already have one that has a harder time sleeping I even more so don't think it would be a good idea.
If you have the ability to give each child their own room, then I would. They can always have "sleep overs" in a siblings room if they really seriously want to but they would have their own space to go to when they need it.

My granddaughters have rooms of their own, but sometimes they prefer to share. When they come to my house, they have to share rooms and even beds! It takes longer for them to fall asleep, but it's actually no big deal.

My children shared rooms - the boys in one and the girls in one. Even with age and sleep differences, they did well, learning to sleep through disturbances. In fact, the big reward was that, when they went away to college, none of them had trouble getting used to sharing a room!

I envy that this is even a question - my 4 have been sharing rooms forever. I didn't have my own room until I was 25, so I'm a vet of room sharing and a huge fan of it. My younger boys are two years apart and they not only share a room, on most nights they also choose to sleep in the same bed. It's great - they fight like heck all day but at night, pile into bed either chatting with each other from one bunk to the other or crashing together in the same bed.

Your two girls are at great ages to room share - I would go ahead and plan on it and do it sooner rather than later so that the 2 year old doesn't feel like she's "losing" her room to the new baby.

Congrats on your pregnancy!

I'd leave the kids in their own rooms for now. The 2 year old and the 4 year old can't play with the same toys. The 2 year old can't play with toys that are choke hazards so if 4 year old wants to play with toys too small for little sis then little sis can't be in her own room. In a year or two they can easily share a room but now it would be really hard.

If you don't know about choke hazards please google it. A friend of mine shared a post from a blog mom who's ill child had passed away. He had some rare disease that was a huge battle so I figured he had lost his battle with it. So I opened it and read. The more I read the more I thought "What a waste". The mom had let her little guy have gummies, he'd choked to death on a gummie. Gummies are a choke hazard for a 2 year old, so are grapes, marshmallows, lego's, Barbie shoes, marbles, and more.

The baby could be in the room with you and hubby for a few months, just put the baby bed beside your side of the bed and you can put your hand through the rails to comfort if they get restless.

By that time it will be time for kiddo to move into their own room.

I like it when everyone can have their own room. I think as kids get older, it's important for them to have a space that is just for them - where they can keep things they don't want anyone to touch, or where they can go and close the door if they want to be left alone.

Since you will likely want them separated eventually, you might as well just do it now. Then no one will have to readjust to a new room later.

My boys have always shared a room. They are 8 and 11 and have never had any issues.

What do your daughters think?

My 2 boys are begging to share a room. And we plan to let them in the next 6 months or so, when the younger one is 4. We are waiting because the younger one tends to take a while to settle down for sleep, and I think he will keep the older one up. By age 4, I think he'll be able to better understand that if he shares a room, that doesn't mean he has unlimited permission to keep his brother up.

That said, if they start fighting over space, or whenever they decide they want their own rooms, we'll move them back into separate rooms. Since we have enough space, we don't plan to make them stay in the same room if they try it and don't like it.

So I guess my opinion is - talk to your kids, especially the 4 year old. If this is something she wants to do and if she understands that she needs to let her sister fall asleep, then go ahead and try it. You can always change your mind if it doesn't work out, either now or as they get older.

it's hard for me to fathom families where every child grows up with their own rooms. america is an anomaly.
if it doesn't work out, you can always go back, right? i mean, why make the decision based off your worst-case scenario fears? what if they don't wake each other up or fight over space?
occasionally my boys would wake each other up, but honestly, i suspect there were many late-night playing or quiet chatting sessions that the dh and i never even knew about. there were also occasional battles. but i'm sure that would have happened whether or not they shared a room.
khairete
S.

My boys shared a room until they were 8 years old, and then they got their own rooms. Sooooo much nicer. Quieter. Cleaner. No arguing over who made the mess and who has to clean it up. No having one wake the other early and make them grumpy. No chatter into the late hours of the night.

The cons of sharing far outweighed the pros for us. It worked for 8 years because that's what we had to do....but once we moved, that was IT. I wouldn't have them share ever again.

My sister and I had our own rooms, but ended up sleeping together in my room anyways. If you want to give it a try, then what's the harm? You can always switch them back and fix up the last room of it doesn't work out.

We live in the city, so space is at a premium! We have three bedrooms upstairs (one master and two kid rooms). One kid room is quite large, the other VERY small. When our second was born, we gave him the small room and bought new "big boy" furniture for the larger space. It included a full sized bed with a trundle that pulls out on the side (like a drawer). We did not intend to have a third baby...until my biological clock informed me that we were NOT done! Baby #3 arrived and for a while (a looooong while, since we had a heart condition and I wouldn't let her out of my sight, she was in our room for 6 months!) and then we had to make the change. My boys were BEYOND excited to sleep together in the same room, so we decided to try it out. We pulled out the trundle for the little guy and got an awesome mattress for it (more comfortable than our sleep number!). For the first three months, it was tough. They both had trouble settling down, so I would bring a book (with a book light) or my ipad in there and sit at their desk until they fell asleep. When the little guy was really impossible (he is my "spirited child") I would bring him into the baby's room, put him the crib, and close the door. After 5 minutes I would go in and he would be hysterical (he liked his big boy bed) and I would bring him back to his big bed. He settled down right away. After those three months, we started putting them down and leaving the room, but stayed upstairs so we could pop in if there was any trouble. After a while, they got SO GREAT at just going to bed.
In the beginning, the little one would climb into the big guy's bed every night. My husband didn't love this, but I convinced him to allow them to sleep like that when they wanted because it DRASTICALLY reduced the number of times the kids came into our room at night scared or in need of something. Now, a year and a half later, the little usually stays in his bed, but once every few weeks or so he will climb in with his brother.
There is one lasting con, which is that the little guy wakes up EARLY and my older one is often inclined to sleep in. The little guy still wakes up his brother in the morning, but we are working on teaching him not to do that. On school days it doesn't matter, but on the weekends I am a little bummed that my busy 7 year old doesn't get more rest. Otherwise, I think its been nice!
We are starting to run into one other problem, but it isn't prevalent yet. My older guy is starting to acquire things that he doesn't want the little one to touch. There aren't many places for him to put these things, so we basically have to put them too high for either of them to reach, which kind of makes them pointless since they don't get used. I'm hoping the 3 year old will move out of his destructive stage soon...or we might end up moving to accommodate the needs of our older child (among other reasons, of course!).
Sorry this is so long, I am still taking down my morning coffee so I might have rambled a bit :) GOOD LUCK!

My 2 year old and 5 year old share.. if we put them to bed at the same time we have to seperate them or they play.

If you can keep your 2 year old seperate or put her down first. But if they see the older one is up, she might want to be up also.

I have my 3 and 6 y/o girls in the same room, even though we have 2 other spare rooms. I like it, I've got them exactly on the same bath/bedtime schedule and things move pretty smoothly, and it all happens one time in one room. They seem to enjoy it. They have no issues over sharing at all, it's just the way it is.

I think this summer I will move them downstairs, to make room for the baby that's coming (boy) but they'll still be together until they express an interest of their own rooms.

I think you will find you really like the convenience of it. Though I suspect you may have a transition period where you have to establish new routines.

2 and 4 are young, they won't protest and they won't have issues over personal space. Within a month, they'll barely remember "the way it was".

And my girls do not wake each other up at all in the night, One or the other may have have a dream, or call for us, or whatever, and it doesn't domino effect at all. When the older was almost 3 and the baby moved in, it didn't alter her sleep habits in the slightest.

I think it depends on your kids' personalities. we moved my son into his sisters room when she was a baby (he was 4). he thought it was unfair that mom and dad get someone to sleep with but he had to be all alone in his room. After the baby was old enough to sleep in her own room we set it up to share. Our son is a good sleeper, so his sister doesn't keep him up altho if he wasn't it might not work.
I shared a room with my younger sister until I was about 12 and wanted my own. it was good bonding and a really positive experience so if you think it's a good fit for your kids then I would do it. kids grow and change, so as long as you are OK with moving them back to their own rooms later, I wouldn't worry about that part.
good luck!

My kids like sharing rooms. In our last house #1 & #2 shared. When we moved, we asked #1 if he would like his own room and he said no. He wanted to share with #3, so #1 & #3 share and #2 has his own. They are all boys--ages 8, 5, and 3. We have enough bedrooms that they can each have their own someday, if they would like. They also have a playroom, so they really only sleep in their rooms.

I had 4 children in a 3 bedroom duplex. My older girls (26 months apart) always shared a room. The boy/girl twins shared a room with separate cribs. We moved to a 5 bedroom house when the kids were 9, 7, and 5. They still continued to share rooms because it was easier. When the twins were 6 we moved my son out to his own room just because it seemed like a good time to make that change. If his sister was afraid she'd end up sleeping on his floor in a sleep bag.

When my oldest daughter went into Jr high we moved her to her own room so at that point each child had their own room.

Don't just assume that the kids will fight. Mine didn't. They loved sharing a room. What you do is make sharing a room a privilege. "If you don't quiet down right now, you're going in the other room to sleep." And then DO IT. Don't just threaten. (Never threaten something that you don't absolutely follow through on...) She will understand that you mean business, that she misses her sister, and also the sister who is being inconvenienced will want her out of the room. That's powerful incentive for her to shape up.

Because of this, I would not allow 'sleepovers'. You lose your bargaining power if you do that. Either they share rooms, or they don't. That will make your child behave...

I didn't have this problem because my sons wanted to be together up until my older son was too big for a twin bed (5th grade). Then I separated them. By the way, I put their twin beds into an L shape. Then liked that and it gave plenty of room in the floor for them to enjoy putting their train tracks together, or laying out all of the cool puzzles...