Opinions on Motorcycles, How Dangerous Are They, in Need of Advice

Hi Loves-

I have mixed emotions about motorcycles...One of my son's recently bought one, and I understand the 'selling points' about gas...

One thing that stuck with me (and I shared with my son) was when my brother (now deceased) was placed on the heart transplant list due to cardio myopathy...The staff were hopeful for him getting a healthy heart if he could make it til May...when the number of 'organ donors' increases...I asked why, and part of the reason was nicer weather...and increased motor cycle accidents. Drivers tend to be younger I guess...and have healthy organs...

Just a thought that stuck with me
Michele/cat

Well, both of my parents rode Harleys for YEARS and I used to ride a "crotch-rocket" when I was in the Navy and stationed in Guam. My brother is a Harley Davidson mechanic and int he Navy Reserves.
All of my parents friends ride Harleys. My parents stopped because they moved to an area where riding 4 wheelers and mountain bikes made more sense than Harleys.
But I know TONS of people who ride or rode and I have never had ANYONE die or get more than road-rash that I know of. Usually if there was a crash there was more damage to the bike than the rider.
And my parents and family and friends do not believe in wearing helmets, so even more of a clue that it is pretty safe with a safe rider.
But I guess I am biased.
My opinion on the "making him" do something part though, motorcycle or not, I do not think that any spouse should MAKE their partner do anything. He is a grown up, he is a individual and you are not his parent.
That is just my opinion.
Good luck :)
PS If we ever have the money to or my brother is able to bring one up from Texas, we will be getting at least 1 Harley.

Three things that you are NOT allowed while being married to me;
1) Motorcycle
2) Bungee jumping
3) Sky diving

If you wanted to do these things, you should not have married ME and had a child. Period.

I don't think you were harsh. My fiance wanted a 'crotch rocket' too at one point and I told him my opinion about it. I don't like motorcyles, they are dangerous even if you know what your doing.

My fiance then changed his mind about wanting one after having to pick up a wrecked motorcyle. (he's a tow truck driver) It wasn't the guy on the motorcyles fault at all. Some woman didn't know where she was going and wasn't looking and turned right into him.

Don't feel guilty, you care about him.

motorcycles are called "donorcycles" or "neckbreakers" by the EMTs.
K. h.

you are right they are dangerous if in the wrong hands. that is it depends on the maturity of the driver. i will not ride with someone who rides stupid. now as far as him bieng killed on one he could also die in a car crash tomarrow. when its your time it is your time whether you have a seatbelt on or not a helment or not a bike a car a truck it doesnt matter when god calls your number its your time and you cant change it

You are right. I used to work on a neuro unit and motorcycles are just a bad thing. I saw people in terrible shape, their lives never to be the same again because of a fun ride....
Doesn't matter how good of a driver you are.
I could just repeat everything you already said because you are spot on.

Back in the day, when I had more of a "real" life than I do now (haha), I dated a motorcycle road racer from New Zealand. It was his JOB. He traveled the country racing motorcycles. How wouldn't ride O. block on a street bike. Ever. He said when he was on a racetrack, the other 30 guys knew what they were doing.

That said, my husband recently bought a Harley. He really is the safest driver I know (painfully slow in his SUV--can't stand to be his passenger) and I think he is safe on the bike.

Yes--accidents can happen and you can't control all of the other people on the road. But he could break his neck falling down stairs too. So could anyone. All HE can do is be as safe as he can be. And take the motorcycle safety courses as well.

I hate motorcycles. My DH had one, not a C.R., and he would ride it on the weekends. I would worry until he got home. I think you are very wise to express your concerns. Just think about how distracted drivers are today with texting and driving. On a motorcycle you don't fair well if someone is distracted and hits you. I think you have a pretty great guy to give up his motorcycle for his family. Don't feel guilty. Feel blessed! :)

My husband rides and so do I. We have a 5 year old, 3 year old, & 7 month old; one of the first things I wanted to do after having the baby was get back on a motorcycle! My husbands main mode of transportation is his motorcycle and once we finish our Total Money Makeover we plan on getting me a used sport bike, aka "crotch rocket."
The people who have said that accidents happen regardless are right. We refuse to live our lives in fear of what *might happen* and take precautions while riding. We have the correct gear and are hypervigilant about watching out for cars & trucks that aren't watching out for us. The truth is that most people who ride aren't racing up & down the freeway doing wheelies but rather everyday people who enjoy riding.
In your position I would think about whether or not you have been scared into this or if it is a valid concern of yours. It seems that when we hear of a devastating story it is easy to internalize it and let our mind go nuts with "what if's" and "it could happens." Do the benefits of him owning and riding a motorcycle outweigh the "what if's?"
On a side note: we are looking into getting our son (5) a 50cc motorcycle and he is currently saving his money to purchase all of the necessary riding gear.
Hope you guys are able to make the decision that is right for your family. Many blessings.

My parents and my brother rode safely for years. Then last spring, almost exactly a year ago, my brother's FIL who was also a very safe rider, had a terrible accident. He was in full protective gear - helmet, chaps, gloves, everything - and a car hit him. FIL was doing everything right. There was nothing he could have done differently except not be on the motorcycle. He is now in a wheelchair most of the time and is blind (the optic nerve was damaged). He is only 50ish. No one in our family rides any longer. Please don't feel guilty.

Ok, 1st off, it DOES matter how careful you are, it's called defensive driving. It's why in 24 years of driving very spiritedly, I've never had an accident. You assume the worst, you assume everyone around you is going to do the WRONG thing. You operate the vehicle, and do NOTHING else while operating the vehicle. You LOVE to drive (ride), it's NOT just transportation, it's a sport, it's an art, it's a craft.

Anyway, my guy is 55 now, he would LOVE to have another bike. I would LOVE for him to have one. He is an outstanding driver (rider), it lights up his eyes, puts a bounce in his step, one of the things I find very sexy about him.

However like your husband, if I asked him to give it up, he would do so in a heart beat. But I would never ask him, it'd be like asking him to NOT be the guy I love.

Just my $.02!

:)

I don't think you should feel guilty. My friend's father is a neurologist, and he has always said that in his job there are only two things that scare him because of what they do to the body: fire and motorcycles.

No, you should not feel guilty. Yes, he deserves to spend his hard-earned money and enjoy it but there are plenty of things to do that with. Sounds like he is thinking about your point of view and that is a good start. He is already looking at trucks and researching how much to sell his bike. Don't be wishy washy and go back against your own word.
I understand there are people who don't get into accidents but I worked in a hospital and I saw plenty of people who do. You can be the most careful person on the road but when it comes to a crash between a motorcyle vs another vehicle, basically, your body is protecting/cushioning the motorcycle, not the other way round.
You are both making good decisions for the wellfare of your children. Yes, things happen and anyone can die tomorrow. But at least you will die knowing that you did all you could to make good decisions for your family's future.

I don't think you should feel guilty, per say.... but I think you are making decisions based solely on emotion; which may or may not be valid - but you two will have to make that decision.

I would not make him give up the motorcycle. I don't want to make you paranoid..... but bad things could happen and have nothing to do with his motorcycle.

I think it's GREAT that he was willing to listen and consider your perspective and that shows that he's a responsible driver who is concerned with safety.

Good Luck.

You did the right thing. Motorcycles are very dangerous. I assume you wouldn't want him to smoke, go tightrope walking, be in rodeos, etc. Yes, life is dangerous, but there are things that we can do to minimize our risks. I think he's making the choice a mature and responsible father should make.

He can always get a motorcycle when the kids are grown.

My boyfriend and his son both have a "crotch rocket". It scares me to death when they ride it. They have been riding bikes for years now. First with a 750 now with a 1000. They both tell me they are great, careful drivers. I tell them that it is not them that I am worried about, it's the idiots out there who do not watch out for them. Just this sunday, a man lost his life when a lady in her car decided to make an illegal U turn when a guy on a bike ran right into her and did not make it. I went to another accident where a lady in a mini van drove out in front of a 19 year old boy riding a bike and he too ran right into the middle of the van and did not make it. (I work in law enforcement, so I can tell you more horror stories but I think you get the picture) They all have been the other person's fault. So all I do, when my boyfriend rides his is tell him that I love him, say a prayer for him and for him to be very careful. That is all I can do. That is his toy and he had it before I can along and he truly loves it.

Motorcycles are sooo dangerous!!! My ex brother in law was almost killed on his he has severe brain damage and will never work again his girlfriend is now raising her kids from a wheelchair! Your kids are still so young! They need you both!!!!

I have been on the back of a bike since I was 15 ( I am now 47). I love being on a bike and will always ride. You do have to be more careful on a bike. So many people comment on how dangerous bikes are but how many times do you read about people dying in a car accident. I don't see everyone giving up their cars and deadly car accidents happen all the time. I did ride less when my children were young because my husband and I always rode together and I worried if we both were hurt who would care for our children. Now that they are in college we bought a Harley touring bike and love it. Do I worry when my husband takes the bike to work? YES! but I also worry when he takes the car to work! This is something you and your husband needs to be comfortable with. I know if it was up to my father he would have never let me on the back of a bike but lets just say I have never listened. :)

My husband had a motorcycle and he loved that thing, but he didn't ride it much once our son was born. Once we moved, he traded the bike for a boat.
If he's a cautious bike rider (doesn't speed, wears a helmet, watches traffic around him, is careful about weather conditions), and the traffic in your area is not too thick, he should be fine.
What happens in dense traffic is people in other vehicles seem to not see motorcycles and crowd them. That can lead to trouble. Cars are a bit more visible (and this depends on the size of the car - that little 2 seater I've see on the road in a few places would be easy to miss next to a semi) but small cars in a crash are not that safe. They flip, get crunched up and I've seen a few zippy sports cars sandwiched underneath tractor trailers.
Try to relax and if his commute really bothers you maybe you should all move closer to his job so he spends less time on the road (no matter what he drives to get there).

My husband bought a Harley when I was pregnant with my our 1st baby. I hated every second of it and was literally miserable. His dad borrowed the motorcycle one day and wrecked it. Thank God he only lost a finger and not his life, but I was so happy to see that thing go.
I told my husband there is no way I could live with fear like that all the time. I told him, I know this sounds horrible, but if he got another motorcycle, I would leave him. I really just couldnt do it. I would literally cringe and feel sick when I saw him ride it. He said I was keeping him from one of his dreams, but I told him that I also had to give up some things when we started having kids. I really dont feel bad about it. He bought a 69 camaro and Im completely ok with it if it will keep him off a motorcycle. There are more important things in life than having a motorcycle. I dont feel bad for protecting him and my children.

If hes willing to sell it, I would encourage him. Hes had his fun.

one of the first things my EX did after our divorce was buy a chopper and he never wears a helmet. My 6 year old son is in love with all things motorcycle and wants to ride on it very badly.

My Ex has already visited two friends who were in an accident about 3 months ago.

My EX took my son to a fundraiser on Saturday for 2 young children who are now parentless b/c of a motorcycle accident about a year ago. Wasn't the rider's fault, but that doesn't make the two young children feel better about not having parents.

While I understand that my Ex is a good rider, I know Dallas drivers aren't. People don't signal when changing lanes and rarely look. So many SUVs mean you can't even see the motorcycles unless you REALLY look.

Everyone is going to be an accident... would you rather it be in a car where you're more likely to live or on a bike where you're more likely to die or be permanently injured? Seems like a no brainer to me.

It's understandable for you to be concerned and worried. My husband wanted to buy a motorcycle (not crotch rocket) and we ended up getting one. He drove it to work for a few months (he drives about 30 miles each way) and then it sat in our garage for months. Because we live in the country (not close to neighbors), we never rode it together. With the shift he was working, he felt bad about taking it out on the weekends alone so we ended up selling it. Maybe you two should come up with a plan - as in he only drives it in certain weather. Other than that, there is not much you can do.

Good luck!

You know what we call "crotch rocket" riders out here??? Organ donors!! No way with two little kids! He might be the safest person on the planet but you can't count on other drivers being careful of him. Hope he finds a truck soon!

I would never, never, ever let myself of one of my loved ones use one of those death traps. Sure they are a lot of fun when you're on a track, but on the freeway? FORGET IT!!!

I live in Los Angeles and have driven to and from down town for 5 years. During those five years I have seen 20 or so accidents with motocycles. Eight of those I saw parts of people. Yes, that's right....parts of people. Usually when the accident involved a semi.

I don't care how good your hubby is at riding a cycle, it's the people in the cars you need to worry about. We live in an age when people are not only eating and putting on makeup while they drive, but texting and talking on their phone. The majority of people on the road today DO NOT look out for cyclists. They weave in and out of traffic without signaling and text or talk on the phone.

If you want to save money have him ride the bus. Dump the cycle.

No you are not being extreme and no you should not feel guilty. I would take this opportunity that he is willing to give it up and RUN with it. Rather than you wanting it gone and he wanting to keep it and having it turn into a big argument. Like the other M.'s have said- they are death traps. And heaven forbid something would happen to your husband, and you look back and wish you would have just gotten rid of it.

My husband would love one too, but i REFUSE to let him. My M., was on a regular motorcycle driving 35mph when a car was fleeing from the police hit her head on- they were going almost 70 mph. Somehow, my M. survived, but broke every limb in her body, shaddered her pelvic bone and wrist. She now has metal plates all over her body, cannot really use her deformed right hand (which she was right handed) among a list of many other things. And that happened over 9 years ago. That was in NO way her fault and she was being very careful of her surroundings, but the fact of the matter is you never know what is going to come around the next corner, or who isn't going to see you- and then hit you.

Its the right decision to get rid of it.