How Do You Deal When It All Piles Up?

Hi T., I almost always feel the same way and sometimes it seems the list is so long that I just don't want to do anything. So I make lists- one "master list" with everything that I need to get done and then I prioritize for each day. If I can get my daily list done on that day and still feel I can do a little more then I'll try to get a head start on the next day's list. I know I at least need to get the things done on each daily list to not feel so overwhelmed. I am a single mom to a 6 year old boy, room parent for his 1st grade class, work full time, soccer team mom and coach, and starting to get my certificate in party planning and open an events planning business with photography on the side ( I minored in photography in college). I try to do everything, as I'm somewhat of a control freak and I noticed that once Oct. hits (my son's birthday was the 4th) and then we have halloween, thanksgiving and christmas that if I don't use the lists I go crazy and have panic attacks- it's gotten bad before. I have to remind myself in between my many cups of coffee, lol, that the world around me is not going to fall apart if the dishes sit in the sink for one night, or if the laundry doesn't get folded right away. It's hard but just knowing that once my list is done, I can breath easy and go to sleep with a clear mind- not one that is running wild on what still needs to get done, then I feel better in the morning and more confident and energized to start the next day's list. Good luck, it will get better! Just remember to breath and take it one task at a time.

I agree with a good nights sleep. Have some banana and milk before you go to bed, it's a miracle sleep aid.

Cry, eat chocolate, enjoy an easy read or tv show to quiet the craziness in my head, take a short walk in the sunshine, play happy music, read scriptures, pray. Don't worry about the house - the mess will wait for you. Conquer one thing at a time and take it day by day. :)

* Sleep. Take it when and where you can get it. Especially w/a 16 month old AND a 6 yr old.

*Exercise. Even a walk around the block. Solitude for 15-30 mins. Ahh.
I walk as fast as I can & do it whenever I can.

*I talk to my friends (older, long term friendships but you can meet new people & create new friendships at the park, through other friends/moms, at jewelry parties your friends/neighbors have, talk to your neighbors, be friendly when your friends introduce you to their friends)

*Ideally, I would like 15 mins/a day to read a magazine or watch the comedy channel.

* At the end of each day or the beginning of each day, write a gratitude list. 5 things you are grateful for. It gives you perspective.

* Sometimes I "disappear into the bathroom" for a 3 mins escape to "catch my breath" before anyone finds me. It helps.

* I like being outdoors so I take my baby to the park or out back. It seems to calm me.

* Turn on the news for a few mins. The awful/sad stories always give me persepective. Then I have to turn if off.

* Make a list of 5 things you HAVE TO DO TODAY: billing for the business, studying etc.

* Let the housework go! I had to do that & that is hard for me but what's more important? Time spent w/my baby & family or how clean my floors are? I do the basics every single day. On my deathbed, may I say "You know, I should have done more housework! " Not, "I wish I would have spent more time w/my kids & hugged them more, loved them more etc."

* Sleep, take your duties/chores in small doses, lose what can fall by the wayside, take a deep breath, get in a walk if you can't exercise regularly, eat healthy, vent to friends etc. Best of luck! :)

A combination of exercise, chocolate, sunshine and a healthy dose of "I'm only human." 15 minutes of cardio can give me enough endorphines to get through... and I HATE exercise. I have just come to recognize the value of it to my mental health (in addition to the obvious physical health benefits.) The chemicals in chocolate are also helpful, and I refuse to think of the Hershey Bar as "ruining" the time I just spent on the elliptical. Instead, I think in terms of how much more chocolate I would have to ingest if I didn't have the workout earlier. A good playlist for your workout is invaluable. I like angry rock for working out my issues. :-)

In addition to all the other wonderful suggestions you have...I have found, as a mother, that good, solid, uplifting ADULT conversations...does wonders. I don't know why...but talking about it...having someone smile and laugh with you and say, "I totally remember feeling that way!" or "My sink is full of dirty dishes and my child had a meltdown at the store the other day too!"...really helps!!

#1 - very strong cup of tea with milk and honey.

#2 - Start BACKWARDS PLANNING...in all things that you do...carve out the time you need for each major item.

#3 - PRIORITIZE the major items, put them in your calendar, in your head and PROTECT that time for that event, or paper, or test, etc.

#4 - You must get enough sleep...so you must SIMPLIFY your life and figure out where you waste time...perhaps dressing? Then wear the same simple styles over and over. Perhaps cooking? Then prepare the same simple meals for several weeks until you catch up.

#5 - ASK Friends and Family for HELP..BEFORE YOU NEED IT.

GL!!

Go do something fun you like to do, all by yourself. Then.........lists.....lists.....and more lists. I have daily lists, weekly lists, monthly lists, long term lists, lists of things I would like to get done at some time. It works for me to keep me going on a daily basis, but not lose track of the things I want to get done by winter, Christmas, spring, etc.

I try to start by getting a good night sleep and starting fresh the next day. When I'm sleep deprived everything seems 100 times worse. Then I work off of lists. And I make sure that some of the stuff on the list is easy so I can check things off. That makes things seem better to me. Plus I keep reminding myself that this is only temporary. The messy house can wait until after your midterm on Monday. Schedule some time to do something fun with your 6 yo (doesn't have to be a huge time commitment, but make sure it is something you too enjoy doing together). Good luck with everything. We're all human and can only do so much.

T.:

Okay- on the bill collections? In box me? We are right around the corner from each other and I'm more than willing to help out.

I've got two boys, ages 9 & 11, we'll get your kids over here so your 19month old can get some energy out!! And this will give you time to get your paper done as well as decompress....

messy house? If it gets bad - I call a cleaning company to come in and tackle it for me. If that's not in the budget, I ask the able bodied (which means all) to help straighten up.

Friday night is my girls night out. So you can have something to do on a Friday night.

Now if we didn't live within 10 miles of each other? I would prioritize my day or weekend to make sure stuff got done.

Have a date with my 6 year old...whether it be ice cream or the park - 15 to 30 minutes and they think it's been hours.

Ask husband to take toddler to the park so I can study for my exam. Maybe take both of them so I don't feel guilty? Good for him as well since he needs time with the kids.

Not worry about the house RIGHT NOW.

Ask someone else to do the collections for me.

Does that help? Please feel free to inbox me!!

I cry. It helps. :o)

How do you eat an elephant? O. bite at a time.
Prioritize what needs to be done. Work the list!
Sometimes you have to schedule down/play/friend time.