Sahm? - Flagstaff,AZ

Hi F., I have always been a SDAHM, and would not have done anything different. I have never a day with my kids, never missed any mile stones, and never missed plays, award assemblys, dance shows, base ball/tee ball games I missed one open house cause i was sick but 13 years of school with 3 kidd and that is all i have missed. SAHM is the best, worst job in the world. I loved it and now they are grown and i can say in all honesty I raised my own kids. J.

I've been a SAHM for close to 20 years. It was the right thing for me and I'm so pleased to have been able to be home all the time for everyone.

I will say however, the pay SUCKS!!

Enjoy it!

as a mom who transitioned from working to part-time to work at home/sahm, i'll tell you the best thing to do is get a good support system of like-minded moms. although i loved being with my children, it can get very mind-numbing without any adult stimulation. especially if you have been working for so long. also, i'm not sure your industry, but maybe stay connected with on-line chat groups in your field.

the key is to not loose YOU in the transition.

i wish you well.

I worked almost 20 years in a very demanding field FT before I switched to PT. Let me tell you--being "at home" is the toughest job you'll ever have! You will need your time management skills and so much more to cope and thrive! Good luck with your transition!

Being a SAHM is what you make of it. I have never, ever, ever been bored. I do a small amount of side work but am primarily at home with my kids. We now homeschool, as well. Just be sure you get what you need, whatever that is. Is it quiet, alone time? Time with friends? Reading time? Exercise? You need to be sure you are fed emotionally so you can really be there for your kids.

I agree with Phyllymami 100%. You need to make sure that you still have adult connections and activities you do for yourself. Staying at home is wonderful, as you don't miss out on anything going on with your kids. However, it can become isolating. Trust me, there will be days when you think to yourself, Why am I doing this? And that is ok. Being a full time, stay at home mom is a really tough job. (not that working is not, but it is SO different) Stay involved with other moms who stay home and do things for you when you get the chance! Good luck and enjoy it!

The first question that came to mind specifically for your situation is that there will be such a difference in structure, from working for someone other, to being in complete charge of your self and family w/o the artificial deadlines,

What does your psychiatrist say about your ability to self motivate and stay on track with your disability? If meds will not help in the long run, how will that affect you interpersonal skills with your family and children? Because they will now be getting the full ups an downs of being you. How have they been informed and kept abreast to date about your disability?

Are there support groups in your area, or s/t provided through your psych, that might help you with the transitions and what lays ahead?

Personally, like other moms here, I worked a high level management job for a defense contractor, specifically with international air force customers. Had great benefits, tenure and travel.

My identity was completely wrapped up in my career and when I first became a SAHM and the conversation rolled around to me and what do you do, I would always answer with what I USED TO DO. This lasted for many months. Until one day I overheard a women jokingly say to another women, "What, can't your husband afford to keep you at home." IDK exactly why that comment affected me, but I realized I had made a huge decision to leave that corporate life and be their for my husband and children and I was going to be the best mom I could be.

Every story is different, but even when I was working, I was a single mom at the time, I always had to leave work to get to the daycare on time, I would have to plan my meals and prioritize my errands like any other mom, I dreamed about having time to keep the house more functional, etc.

Now, my kids have access to me whenever they need me. I just spent today as a matter of fact taking them rock climbing. Yesterday, I took them to the zoo. My freedom and ability to be spontaneous is probably the BEST part of being a SAHM. Those outing would have never happened if I was working and I truly feel blessed to be able to spend that kind of time with my kids. I get to raise them and instill the values that I know are important.

I would think in Flag you could enjoy that amazing observatory on a regular basis, the university libraries, both winter and summer sports....make lots and lots of memories with your children. If you have been working for so long it will be like Christmas having you home all the time.

I left a very stressful job to be a SAHM after we had our third child last year and I'm so glad I did it. I love it! I'm still learning how to balance housework, spending time with the kids, running errands, taking the kids out to do fun activities and squeeze in my Mamapedia time but we're starting to get a schedule that works for us.

Make sure you do things to get out of the house for some Mommy time or else you will go crazy! I make sure to go out to dinner with my girlfriends at least once a month and I'm getting ready to start a weekly Photography class.

Good luck!

I love being a sahm! I get to play with my kids and cook dinner for dh. I try to do other things to occupy my mind like going to school or doing crafts/recipes with the kids. Even if it's just every once in a while getting an app on the phone for one of them and teaching them how to play it or a movie. Our relationships are a lot closer because they have all of my time and energy.

I have had a successful, rewarding, high power career of 12 years. Then gradually, more and more, i have become, am becoming a stay at home mom. My kids need me more than i ever expected, and i want to share that responsibility less than i ever expected. I love my time with them. But i also loved my work. I am sometimes worried how to get started again when they really need me less....? But mostly ok, since i still get offers etc.

Anyway, not your problem, right? SAHM is the most challenging, exhausting and fulfilling work i have ever done. It is a zillion times harder than what i did before (and believe me that was hard: stressful travel, public talks, presentations in front of scary audiences, unexpected deadlines...). And i love it, too.
Good luck with your transition! It doesn't have to feel right all of the time, but most of the time in the long-term average... ;-)

I worked for 14 years in the financial services industry and along the way I earned a BBA in Finance and an MBA in management. I am 33, almost 34. My husband is a pilot in the military and this past May I left my career to follow him while he attended a 6 month long graduate level training class for his job, thus becoming s SAHM to our now 21 month old daughter.

After being a career woman and very self-sufficient/independent, I was worried about how I would handle being home. I officially passed the 6 month mark this week and am thrilled to be home. I didn't know what to expect but its nice to not be rushing out the door everyday to work and then rushing back home to get dinner ready and baby to bed. I find myself much better abel to cope with the little things that come up in life (car repairs, home maintenance, etc). Its not easy filling the day with things to keep myself and my daughter busy but I do run two successful at-home business (not like Mary Kay or anything- an actual business with a Tax ID and everything) which helps keep me occupied.

There are also a lot of moms groups/activities to get involved with. I say its just as hard as working but a lot more fun and much more rewarding!

My mom battled with mental illness, and she couldn't hold a job, got money from my grandparents, and she spent most of my teenage years on the couch...and was overly religious, with a huge chip on her shoulder about my dad, and as an adult I have very little respect for her that she couldn't contain herself and had zero social life. That being said, stay as involved as you can, make sure that you and your husband understand your trigger points where you start to slip (like what behavior do you do that becomes irrational), do not isolate yourself, be careful what you say around your kids (like: What would you do if I died? Yeah, I heard that...). And keep your short term daily goals more important than your long term. You have to watch the day to day activity.

I wish you the best of luck. Stay strong. BTW....I turned out just fine, and my sisters did too. We are more resilient because we saw this adversity and were very independent.