Room Sharing - Pittsburgh,PA

Updated on July 08, 2010
I.W. asks from Pittsburgh, PA
10 answers

We have just recently moved our 2 year old into our 4 year old's room and so far its not going too great. The first night, my youngest was up every 2 hours screaming and waking my oldest (and the whole house) up. The second night he slept great, but the next day my oldest was exhausted. The third night I found out why, before I even left the room my youngest crawled into bed with my oldest, apparently that was how he had slept so well the night before! When I keep them apart (which is nearly impossible to do), its an all night screamfest. When they sleep together they sleep for 8 hours tops and are both tired and cranky all day (my oldest has even started taking 3 hour naps during the day!). Any advice?

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Featured Answers

L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

If I were you, I'd find a way to give them their own rooms...
Nobody is sleeping.
Nothing good is coming out of it.
YMMV
LBC

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M.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My boys have seperate rooms but still sleep together every night-alternating rooms. I think it is really comforting for them to be together like that. I love seeing them all snuggled up together-esp considering how they fight like crazy during the day! So....maybe you should let them sleep together and not fight it. Consider getting a bigger bed so there will be more room. Also-don't let your 4 yo nap during the day-esp not for 3 hours. This way he will be more sleepy at bedtime.

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B.

answers from Augusta on

If they are in twin beds why not push their beds together maybe put a rail between them to keep them from kicking each other but they would essentialy be sleeping together but with more room.

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S.V.

answers from Philadelphia on

I think that it will blow over. My husband has a big family, and when I bug him, he kind of rolls over and deals with it. He can sleep through almost anything, noises etc. He said it was because when he was little, his siblings would come bug him, and mess with him in his sleep, so he just learned to sleep a little harder. lol. my brother-in-law has his own big family, and i've seen it in action. Your oldest will learn to deal with it in time.

However, some previous posters are right in that you should be setting some boundaries for your youngest, if you are worried about your oldest.

But i think that it really isn't too big a deal.

A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

This sounds like a discipline issue. An all night scream fest implies tantrums, and you should discipline that firmly as soon as it starts so they understand it's not allowed. Same with crawling in the bed with a brother, etc.
My kids are these same ages and share a room. They've never been allowed to get out of bed or throw tantrums, so they didn't start when we put them in a room together. If you firm up your rules, this will pass. Check on your youngest, make sure he isn't leaving his bed. Be consistent with consequences whenever he does. Don't let him get away with it. Don't allow scream fests. Use consequences.
They'll only do what they're allowed to do.
The only other option is giving them their own rooms. You can do it! Be firm and you'll have two groovy roommates soon enough.

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J.B.

answers from Denver on

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child- I believe there is a chapter devoted to shared sleeping situations.

D.S.

answers from Allentown on

Hi, I.:

Don't let the 4 year old sleep more than 1 1/2 hrs for his nap.
Families go through tough times together. It will resolve itself
and then another challenge will present itself.
This is where you get all your experience for your
grandchildren.

Good luck. D.

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K.G.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I am going through that right now, except I have 3 in a room due to a SMALL house. I have 3 boys, 1, 3, and 7. The 1 year old is the best. He goes right to sleep and is sometimes woken up by his brothers. However, the 3 and 7 year old are constantly fighting. This is one thing that I have found that works. I put the 3 or 7 year old to bed 1/2 hour earlier than the other one. By that time one is already asleep and USUALLY doesn't bother the other one. So maybe try putting the 2 year old to bed 1st and that way he might be asleep in his own bed when the 4 year old goes to bed. Good Luck!

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D.M.

answers from Detroit on

Hi I.---My guess that this will be a temporary, although difficult situation until all are used to the new arrangement.

Your 4 year old should be old enough to verbalize what is going on. Maybe suggest that if his brother wakes him, he should just go crawl into the other bed so he can sleep alone.

Try to smile as you watch the dynamics of your babies learning to adapt to a new situation. This is peanuts. Wait til they get bigger (lol ;).

Good luck...Happy 4th of July! D.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

well i kinda feel sorry for your oldest... he is not getting a good sleep...
he is 4 and can express his feelings to you... and any good/bad feelings about it. You wouldn't want him to resent the youngest nor the arrangements....
Can they have separate rooms?
2 years old, they naturally have sleep tweaks... and not sleep all night, like a 4 year old.

Then the next day they are both overtired... and cranky. I would be too. But we are the adults... so logically, we can cope better with it. Not a 4 year old. Nor a 2 year old.

Where was the 2 year old sleeping previously? And was he/she sleeping well there? Perhaps keep to that set up.

When I was a child, there was a time I had to share a room with my sibling.. I hated it. She always caused trouble and I was the more laid-back one... so I was 'expected' to put up with it. It was not fair. Then I got my own room. Which was much better.
Not all siblings sleep well together.

All the best,
Susan

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