Please HELP!!! Seeking Advice on Breaking from the Pacifer!

My daughter was a little over 3 when we got rid of hers. We started out with the just at bedtime/naptime and when Easter rolled around we left them for the bunny and that was that. Sometimes they are ready and just need a push, sometimes they are no where near it. You the best judge of that.

Cathyd

I don't know if this will help or not but it worked for us. My little guy loves the local university's mascot the Redwolves. We talked to him about how the baby redwolves needed pie pies (pacifiers). Within a couple weeks he decided he was a big boy & wanted to give his pie pies to the baby redwolves. We then took him for a drive and he threw the pie pies into the woods to the baby redwolves. He never asked for pie pies again.

You've had quite a few responses but I didn't see this one yet... :) First of all, good luck!! When my older son was almost 2.5 he started biting holes in the paci. Well, I told him we don't do that, it's dangerous etc... I had a whole cup of them (he didn't know it). I ended up throwing away the one with a hole and bringing out a new one. This happened a couple times. Then I told him *this* is the last paci. If you chew a hole in it, then no more pacis.

Then came the hole. How to follow through??? The first night we were at a friend's house and he fell asleep on the way home and went into the crib - so out of it that he never knew. The next morning my mom called to tell me that my friend said give it a week. That night we had to go to bed without the paci. OH MY GOODNESS!!! If my mother hadn't told me to give it a week... So, about day 4 or 5 the crying at bedtime stopped. We had already just been having it in bed. Whenever he asked for it, we would just say remember? It broke!! All gone in the trash...

So, just another thing to try - it worked for us!! We didn't take it away because we thought he needed to get rid of it but for safety reasons and that is what we impressed on him.

His little brother only uses his for naps and bedtimes to begin with so I hopefully won't have to go through it AS much this time!! :)

One thing to try is to start by only allowing the baba in his bed. Tell him that it can't leave the bed and if he wants it, he has to go there. I did this to my little ones before completely taking it away. They were about 11-12 months when I did it. Another idea is to go cold turkey and take it away. It will be a fussy few days, but he will get over it. I have friends that have used the "baba fairy." They let their child pick out a very special gift that they want badly. They then have the child put all of the babas on their bed when they go to bed at night. The "baba fairy" comes (a bit like the tooth fairy) and excanges the babas for the toy. If you do this, you MUST throw them away and not be able to get to them in desperation. Remind him if he wants them, that the baba fairy took them and you cannot get them back. I have some friends that clipped the bottoms so that they no longer get suction and the child no longer wants it. I never bought a size bigger than newborn. I didn't want to make it easier to use and to fit their mouths better as they grew.

I have heard of people leaving them for Santa...I don't see why the Easter Bunny wouldn't want a pacifier! Make a really big deal about how excited the easter bunny will be and how he'll put it in a "little kid's" basket. I'd get a really really big easter gift as a "thank you" to put in it's place. Maybe a big stuffed animal he can even sleep with the first few nights.

Good Luck!

I have heard of people making a "pacifer tree" where you tie the pacifer to a tree in your yard and tell your child that the pacifer fairy needs to borrow his for a new baby somewhere else. Then, of course, you throw them away where he can't find them after he goes to sleep. Some children respond well to the idea that the thing they love is going to help another child. I hope you find something that works because sucking too long on a pacifer can cause teeth problems later.
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J.

Hi T.

I would like you to know I had the same issue but I read somewhere that a child left all the pacifiers on the door step for the pacifier fair and in return they got a big kid toy. I did it with my son we did it last easter we left them for the easter bunny. since that day he has never asked for it again. and he was the kid that had it in his mouth all the time unless he was eatting or talking.

My daughter was addicted to her pacifer as well and what we did was tied her pacifers to a ballon with helium and let them go into the air and told her that we were sending them to Jesus so that he could give them to other little kids that needed them. We told her since she was a big girl he needed to give them to babies that didn't have them and she was ok with that. Once they were gone it was kind of like out of sight out of mind. It was a lot easier than I anticipated. Good Luck!!

We started earlier with my daughter (when we moved from bottle to sippy), but this worked well:

I always took it out at night after she had been sleeping for a few hours so she didn't get used to sleeping with it.

I also cut the tips off the end (of all of them, that way you can still have several around), but did so gradually. A little bit here, a few weeks later a little more. That way she gradually adjusted and found that it wasn't satisfying any more.

I also limited only to nap and night time, and then took away naps too. (Your son will probably respond to some advance notification for each phase i.e. that after this week, paci will only be @ night/nap time.)

After several weeks, and not much of a nipple left, when we told her that after today we wouldn't have it anymore b/c she was a big girl, she didn't much care.

Plan on several weeks, but it was pretty painless for everyone.

ok- mine was 2 1/2 and ADDICTED also! I tried acting like they were "lost", confining them only to his crib (he'd sneak them out) everything- the only thing that worked was: it was very traumatic that day, but hey- it worked. I was angry b/c he had a cold and couldn't breathe through his nose but refused to let the paci go. I tried throwing them away but he dug them out of the trash. Finally, in the middle of the day, I CUT the rubber pieces off all of them right in front of him. He was pissed, to say the least, and had a melt down, but after that he cried himself to sleep (nap). He asked for them that night before bed and I reminded them that they were all broken. After that, he maybe asked one more time and that was it!!! He was CURED!!! It was a bad day, but only one day and he knew they were gone.

Harsh, I know, but it worked!

Oh T. W....I am so where you are! My little girl will be three in less than a month...and I know that I need to break her from it, but for the life of me I just can't seem to do it....I forced it on her when she was a baby because I nursed her and she just wanted to hold my nipple in her mouth for comfort...even when she wasn't eating...so I replaced it with her Fi Fi....I sort of feel guilty for taking it away now that it is not convinient for me. Everyone asks when I am going to take it away and I tell them that surely she want want to take it to the prom with her! It has to go, but I am hoping she will give it up on her own......

Have your son throw it away. Once it is in the trash, if he asks for it tell him it's "all gone" or how ever you have been telling him "something he wants is not available". You should expect a day or two of tantrums and if he has been using it to go to sleep, about a week of getting used to self soothing without it. You can practice the self soothing before you have him throw away the pacifier, so he has an idea of how to calm himself. Trying to ease him out of the habit will be confusing for him. He doesn't have the complex thinking capacity that adults have and won't understand why it is o.k. sometimes and not at other times. Good Luck!

My little girl just turned 2 a few weeks ago and she was also addicted to her pacifier,but hasn't had it for about 3 months now. A few months ago we were going out of town for the weekend a few days before we left my mom, who watches my children, cut part of the tip off of it, which did not phase her at all she still sucked it. So while we were gone every time she would ask for it we would try to change the subject and keep her mind off of it. She went to sleep w/o it while we were there, then on the way home we didn't give it to her, kept changing the subject and getting her mind on somethig else. After we got home the first few nights were kind of rough she cried beofre she went to bed, then after that we would tell her she was a big girl and the babies had pacifiers now. She has been fine since she sees them and says they are for babies. Hope this helps. Good Luck. It was kind of sad for me to take hers away because it meant she was growing up, but I knew I had to b/c I'm like you I didn't want her to be 3 or 4 walking around with it.

M. H

I've read everyone responses before mine and all those methods work except for the ones that tell you he is fine and will grow out of it.....that's a lie! My mama and my two oldest brother's sucked their pacis til pre-k! My grandma told me she use to catch my mama with hers at school!! But yes is the perfect time to break him! I broke my son right after he turned one. He liked to play alot especially with bigger kids so I told him he had to be a big kid to play and that he wasn't a big kid cuz he sucked a pacis!! So in order for him to play he had to give up his pacis! By the time he finish playing he was half way broke so when he asked for it I told him I gave it to a baby! And one day he found the one we kept for him on airplanes and he put in his mouth and said "nasty, for babies"!!

I will say only one thing. If they need to suck they will suck. It may be a thumb, a finger, an edge of a blanket, etc....if he has that need to suck then let him keep the pacifier. I went through this with my daughter and she sucked the middle finger of her right hand even up in jr. high when she was stressed out or very worn out. As a result when we went to get her examined for braces the Dentist said they wouldn't do any good. We needed to break her jaw and put some kind of a brace in her mouth so that extra bone would grow because her bottom jaw was so recessed. It's not noticeable from the front but from the side it is.

A pacifier is much easier for a child to put down at some point in the future than a finger or object is.

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I am breaking my 22 month old right now so I know what you are going through, although mine is not totally addicted like yours. My daughter only gets her paci at night. I stopped buying pacifiers a few months back and have been searching every night for one until finally I think they must all be lost. Since I refuse to buy more I am forced to wean her which I wanted to do by 2 anyways. She found a paci in my purse the other day at Walmart and threw it on the floor and I left it there. So now when she asks for it, I just tell her you threw it down in the store and we lost it, it is gone.

Here are a few ideas: Since the Easter bunny is around right now you can take him to the Easter bunny, have him give the Easter bunny his paci and maybe slip the bunny a little stuffed toy to give him. The stuffed toy can be something he really likes like a dinosaur, disney beanie of a character he likes, or maybe a night light type animal... this will take the place of his paci, especially at night.

Have him put all his pacifiers in a big envelope (he can color the envelope). Then have him put the envelope in the mail box and say you are mailing them to the "Big Boy Fairy" and she will send him back a big boy present in return for his pacifiers. Then when he naps (or you can have your husband do it on the sly) take out the envelope and replace it with another envelope or package with a special toy or stuffed animal. Then take him back out to the mailbox to get his special package. You can make it extra special by decorating the package or hanging balloons all over mailbox with streamers so he can see that the fairy came. You have to make it real fun and exciting so he will be willing to give up the paci and when you remind him (when he asks for his paci) and you tell him the fairy has them, he will remember the toy he got and fun he had giving them away and getting his pkg)

For my oldest daughter we went to the park and threw the paci to the ducks. (Just one, just throw away the others) So whenever she asked for them, she remembered we threw it to the ducks and they were gone.

The key is to stick to it once you decide to do it. It is hard not to give in when they cry for it or when it will get you a little more sleep in the morning. But you have to throw them out and just go cold turkey. They will cry, but trust me, it won't last long. Just get his mind on something else when he asks for it.

If you haven't taken your child to the dentist yet, go. If anyone can talk you into how important it is to wean your child of a pacifier, the dentist can. Even as young as they are, if they are constantly sucking on it, it can really mess up their teeth and palate. My 3 year old was addicted to her paci too and she pretty much sucked her palate in to where it will have to be fixed to make it wider when she is 4 or 5 so her teeth will have room to develope.

One: don't buy anymore of them for him.

Two: loss the one he has now and throw away all the ones he has at home.

Three: if you don't want to take the one away he has now just do the second half of two and when he losses his baba, don't give him another one.

I understand that this will cause crying but you will have to listen to it to break him of his baba.

My mom always says put some hot sauce on it.

When my daughter was around 15 mos. old we went to the Dr. for a ear infection and I asked her what to do. She advised me to cut the tip on the end and that would make my daughter not want it any longer. Well we came home and I did that and guess what my daughter went and put it in the trash herself. Now we had our moments b/c they are smart about having more than one but hey that worked for us.

Good luck

My doctor told me to cut the tip of the pacifier off so it won't create a suction and it worked for my little boy. He still liked having it near him at night for a couple of months but eventually he quit asking for it.

I can tell you how I got mine to quite and I thought he would have it going to school. He had it pin to him most of the time. Then we pinned it to the bed and the only time he could have it was when he went to bed. It was hard a first but he did realize this and we held strong and so if he needed a minute he would go to his room.

Try it!

My 2 year old and I took a trip to my dad's house and we 'forgot' his paci. He asks for it occasionally, but I tell him babies have a pacifier, not big boys. It seems to work.
My sister in law's son has just turned 3 and was more addicted than my child was. She rounded all of the paci's up and soaked them in apple cider vinegar. He asked for one, she rinsed it off and he put it in his mouth...hbe immediately spit it out and told her paci was yucky...after thr 3rd one, he decided he didn't need one.
With her other child she took an exacto knife and made a very small cut in the end of the paci, then all of the paci's were broken!
Just a few things that have worked, stay positive and know you will not have a 12 year old with a paci. GOOD LUCK!

Been there and done that with both of my children. The only thing that will work is persistence on your behalf. I must warn you, there will be lots of crying but try to console him and let him know that he is a big boy now. ANd if you throw all of them away then you won't be able to give in to the tantrum.

Just take it away. I did that with my son when he was like 1 1/2. He cried like crazy for one day, and then forgot about it. it might be harder since your son is older, but they're more resilient than you think. If you can stand the crying, it's the easiest way.

Try the baba fairy. Have him leave it for the baba fairy to give to other babies, since he's now a big boy. Put the baba in a gift sack next to his bed. Before he gets up in the morning, replace the baba with a new toy, perferably something that he can sleep with. Make sure all babas are out of sight & gone... you don't want him finding one later. It's probably just a habit, so out of sight... out of mind.
If he won't go to sleep without it, then you might replace it with something before he goes to bed. Give him a new blanket or stuffed animal that he can use to comfort himself, instead of the baba. You might even let him pick out the new bedtime toy.
Good luck!

T.,
was you about 2 years ago. My daugher was so attached to her "passi." I knew it had to go. So when she turned two I only let her have it in her bed for nap and bed time. And when she turned three we told her (starting about a month before) that "when you turn three the passi's break." She had a younger sister, so I had to come up with something that would allow baby sister to have it and not her. So the night of her third birthday I told her, yet again, that "tonight is the last night you get your passi." After she fell asleep I went in there and cut them off, right at the base. There was NOTHING left for her to suck on. The next morning I showed her what happened to them (including the ones in the cabinet). and she was totally fine with it. The next night she asked for it, but I told her they were broken. and that was that. Even 6 months later, she is fine with her little sister having it (at night only). If your son is only two, I wouldn't push too hard for him to give it up entirly. Let him have it only at night, or only in the car and then when he turns three try the method I suggested - it worked GREAT for us. BTW, long before her 3rd birthday we tried cutting the tip off so there would be no suction and that didn't phase her in the least bit, she couldn't have cared less. I hope you find success. I know EXACTLY what you are going through. S.

This is one of those battles left alone. Let him have his passy. It's not hurting anyone except you at this time. Many of us have 2 yr. olds with it and as long as they are happy and content - mom should be too. Our daughter LOVED her passy and when she was about three she threw it away herself. My husband and I looked at eachother terrified that she would realize what she did and start screaming. I told him I have a few hidden around the house but she never asked for it again. They will give it up when they are ready and have a real sense of security about it - no screaming/fit pitching! Also, a mom of five told me once that she has never seen a bride or groom walking down the isle with a passy AND if they did, it was someone else's problem at that time!!! Everyone in the room laughed and agreed it was nothing to get stressed over. It's just a phase that will eventually wear off.

Hi T.. My daughter was pretty attached to "Pappy". I think she was about 2 when her pediatrician told us to try to break her from it by 2 1/2. I borrowed a trick from someone at our church. During her nap time one day, I went in and got the pacifier and cut the tip of it off down close to the base. I threw the tip away and when she woke up she called me and said, "Pappy broke." She helped me look for the tip, and for another Pappy, but we "couldn't find one". We kept the Pappy in her room to remind her that Pappy broke and encouraged her to sleep without it. This also takes stamina from you though - don't cave in! Trust me, it's a good time - you don't want his speech or teeth to be affected by this!

I never gave my son a pacifier for that very reason, i didn't want to have to break him from it. But, both of my sister in law's boys were very addicted to them. When the doctor told her that it was time to stop, she just went home and cut all the nipples off of them. Once the boys realized they didn't work, they simply gave them up. Sounds a bit harsh to me, but it worked for her both times. Best of luck!
Have a great day and god bless!!

When my daughter was 2 we cut a hole in the end of the pacifier. She brought it to me and said, "It's broke." She handed it to me and went on. She told her dad when he got home from work that her "bubby" broke and went on playing. At bed time we just reminded her that it broke and she was fine with that. That was all it took. Just the one day. She did not say anything about it again. I hope this helps.

I have never tried it but i saw on Super Nanny once - they told the child they needed to leave their pacifiers for the binky fairy... they tied them all to ribbons and hung on a tree outside - once the child took a nap you go take them down and have a little "gift" under the tree for them - like the tooth fairy idea... good luck!

I will add to what a couple of other moms said about cutting the tip off of the pacifier. That is what my mom did for my brother and what we did for our daughter at about 16 months and what we will do for our son. We started with the tip and then in a few days cut more off. You just keep taking more off until he decides he doesn't want it. I think the important thing is that when he decides not to use it anymore that he is the one that throws it in the trash. That way when he says anything about it you can remind him that it was broke and the HE threw it away. Good luck.

Leave him alone. When he goes to school or even nursery school he'll stop. The sucking instict is stronger in some children than others. He's just a baby. Why does that bother you? If you are comparing him with other children, or what someone else thinks...remember we are all very unique.