Mom in Need of Help - Holladay,TN

Hi K.. I know what she is going through. I am bi-polar. It is like have PMS but 20 times worse. I know that when my medication was not regulated, I would act out by yelling, crying, being promiscuous, among other things. Alot of what she is doing, she can not control. She knows what she is saying is hurtful, but she cannot keep herself calm and think rationally before the words spill out of her mouth. It is very important that you find someone that can get the meds tweaked. If you are seeing a family dr for this, stop. She needs a psychatrist. They know how other meds will interact with bipolar meds. Another thing to watch for is to watch her and make sure she is really taking her medications. Sometimes if a medication is making a person feel "dragged down", they will not take it. They will spit it out in the sink or trash.
My best friends son was throwing his behind the refrigerator.

When she screams at your husband, you still reprimand her. You let her know that you understand that she is going through a difficult time right now but that you will not tolerate disrespect. Sometimes people use the bipolar to get away with being nasty to someone.

If you would like to talk to me further about being bipolar, send me a message. I hope that I have given some useful information.

L.

Hi K.:
I have a little experience with bipolar disorder since my former mother-in-law had it. She was completely controlled by taking her lithium. It took a while to get the dosage just right, but when they did, you would have never known she had anything going on. She also took Elavil at night to help her sleep. She had one manic state in the 12 years that I knew her, and that was when she went into the hospital dealing with metastatic cancer. The doctors got the bright idea to start messing with her medicine, and it threw her for a loop. Now, I realize dealing with bipolar in a teenager is a whole different situation, but I would think that Lithium would still be a necessary medication to help control the manic outbursts. You didn't mention therapy. Is your daughter able to talk to a counsellor or a therapist to help her deal with losing her father at such a young age? I have a 15 y/o stepson who likes to pick fights with me, and his mother is still living. I think he just has some underlying resentment toward me because I'm the one who is HERE...doing all the normal Mom things for him and his mother is NOT. Maybe your daughter is having some of the same feelings without realizing it...toward your husband. Best of luck, dear...and keep us informed.
~~C.

I have to say it is exhausting and honestly you will rarely find someone who really knows what your facing. My dau 10 ral father never wanted her, has a step D loves but fights alot. He doesn't always see the whole picture. She has a lot to deal with. MY son 9 bipolar, with OCD, GAD, and form of PDD. Loves his D, fights all the time. D just does not get it. I have a dau 6 showing HUGE signs of perfectistic figures and mood swings under stress. Loves her D, and does not fight w/D but he doesn't get it. she is very sensitive. I have a son speech impaired showing signs of ADHD. It is very hard for others to understand how kids get this and what you go through everyday too. I will say this. You not alone. I wish there was a support group for us moms. I thought about starting one just to meet moms like us. About the fighting. when it happens watch see if there is a trigger, maybe something said that she misunderstood or took the wrong way. First tell your husband you support him as much as your dau. He will never get anywhere if she is yelling. You need to have him explain that they will address this when she is calm, send her to her room.I had to carry my 70 lb son to his. When she is calm, have him go in, start with I love you,can we talk, I am sorry if I did something to hurt your feelings, but I want to help you. I do not understand how you feel, don't pretend to either, and would like too. She needs to have her feelins valdiated, and you might even see her vldiate his. Use "I" statements. " I felt ___when you did this..How did you feel? Yes, it makes a big difference. Being bipolar you feel like know one understands, it is scary, and sometimes harder on the child then a parent can image. They love you, it is about helping them to cope and love themselves. They know they are different, sometimes that is all it is about. They have not learn to love themselves. I hope I helped a little. Today just hug her, no reason. Just hug her.

my daughter has a emotional problem. i am a psych major and am really disappointed in the way professionals handle teens. try prefered options and understand she maybe going through and emotional confusion or post traumatic syndrome. if you need someone to talk to call me & ###-###-####

please look at this website.... I used to work at ETL and I can tell you I saw your daughter everyday, just in a different body. This program can really change your life, her life, your whole family Dynamic. If you have any questions I can explain it to you further. I do not work for them anymore I stay home with my youngest son, I am not trying to sale you something I am simply trying to show a SURE-FIRE way out!

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B.
###-###-#### (Hendersonville)

From:K. I can kinda relate although I am 41 I have been manic depressive since I can remember. I know that alot of it has to do with the meds. It may take 20 different kinds before they find the right mixture that will work for her. I find one that works and I take it a year or if lucky 2 and then normally has to be changed. It is a battle. Who diagnosed her with bipolar? There could be other tings going on with her especially at that age. If you have depression or any kind of mental illness in your family it can be inherited. I wish you the best of luck