Just Need a Little Sympathy

While I can imagine how you feel, you can't be there to protect her from everything, right? Also, if you are worried about permanent damage, I ripped my pinky nail off when I was little and you can't even tell! Feel Better!

Hi M.!

How horrible! I feel so bad for her - and you. Take her to get ice cream. That always makes them feel better (I know - it's only temporary though). Then maybe you can work out some sort of deal with her that if she keeps the bandaid on all day (to prevent infection)then she can pick out a treat or a toy or something of her choice.

Not too long ago my 5 yr old daughter was giving my 2 yr old son a piggy-back ride. She lost her balance and fell right into the entertainment center. It complete knocked out her front tooth by the root and cut her lip. I felt so horrible for her! I just cuddled with her and let her pick out a movie and I sat there and watched it with her. I think it's just the old fashioned cuddling and being taken care of by mommy and/or daddy that makes them feel better.

I can only imagine how she feels - and how you, as a mother, must be feeling for her.

Hang in there!

A.

HUGS! I know sometimes I think oweies are harder on us moms! Don't feel badly in the sense you will not be able to control these things. There unfortunately are many more bumps and boo boos to come. It is inevitable!!! :)

I have two 4 and 7 and we have had our share of illness, bumps, bruises, cuts and so on, thank God nothing serious but it is heart aching to have your little one hurt or upset. Once that initial protective nail starts coming back it will be a lot less sensitive, right now it is so tender I am sure.

When my kids got hurt we had a boo boo jar, filled with M&Ms, they could tell me how badly they were hurt by how many M&Ms it took to help feel better, hee hee!!! Worked like a charm to calm them and then we talked like "well, that seems serious, is that a five M&M boo boo?"...hee hee.

I found out the hard way if we make a big deal out of the boo boo the kids will too, so best to give lot's of love and comfort then try and let it go and just keep it clean and bandaged and stay calm. HUGS HUN!!!!! I hope she is feeling better soon.

Awwww. That sounds like it hurt! Ouch. You must be a good Mom to feel her pain. Awwwww. I am sorry that happened.

Oh, you poor thing! I know just how you feel! The worst part is how long it takes for that nail to grow in.
I was constantly after DH to quit letting our son take off his shoes in the car. Sure enough, one night ds pulled his shoes off on the way home - DH was playing along & they were having a great time. Once we got home we all got out, DH was holding Z and looking for something in the trunk. Bang! Next thing I knew I was frantically trying to open the trunk to get Z's toe out! (yep, somehow his big toe got smashed in the trunk) It turned black and horrible - we both felt awful.
The black is almost gone now, but it's been almost 6 months. Six very long months! :)

My niece dad the same thing - TWICE! When one was healing the other one happened. One got stuck in a screen door hinge and she (by reaction) pulled it out and ripped off the nail, the second a week later, she was playing on a grocery cart while waiting for her mom and somehow damaged another one and it fell off the next day. The doctor put on a finger cot like a hard protective shield the shape of a finger like a splint and it protected it from being bumped and hurt. She didn't seem to have any pain with that on. AND her nails both grew back fine! She was also 2 at the time. My niece's bled a lot - like 2 days but the dr. said that was fine since it was a very small amount.

M.,

When I was 8 years old I got my finger smashed and lost my fingernail. The doctor told my parents that it would not grow back. Today I have a fingernail on that finger. It actually looks better than the others around it.
I still remember the pain of something knocking the bare finger.

The best thing for you to do is to watch the injury and keep it clean. This too will pass in time.

With my whole heart, C.

Oh, I am so sorry! :( I can only imagine how painful and sensitive her finger must feel. Hopefully her little nail will grow back fast.

The best bandages I have found for fingertips are by Next Care and they are the Heavy Duty ones. They are especially made for fingertips and wrap around them and seal. They are shaped like an hourglass.

They are not pretty, but they stay on really well. Maybe you could put a cute bandage over it or draw a face or something on it.

I hope her pain resides however it will probably be very sensitive for a while.

Hang in there! L.

My son, a week ago, got his finger pinched between two boards and his skin was pealed off. Two things I can tell you that helped him. One a bandage that he liked. We had camouflage bandages and he liked them so that worked a lot! Another thing is to have your daughter do something that will take her mind off of it. If she gets distracted then she will soon forget about it and it will make your life a little bit easier.

I don't know if you are a Christian or not, but my son was extremely comforted by first praying about Jesus to heal his finger and knowing that Jesus was healing his finger right then and it will soon be healed.

M.! I can totally empahtize with you here. My son when he was 18 months got his finger stuck under a rocking chair at my cousin's house and it pretty much severed his finger right off. It was a nightmare! I have never been to the ER but we spent most of the day there and I think it was more traumatic for me and my husband than it was for my son. Anyway, they sewed his finger back on but had to pull the whole nail bed out. They were very skeptical if the nail would ever grow back. A couple days later once we got back home we went to see a pediatric hand specialist and he said that the nail would grow back no problem. And he was right, not only did the finger totally heal back together with no loss of feeling or nerve damage, he has a normal nail as well. So don't beat yourself up, her nail will grow back just fine and look totally normal when she is older and wants to get manicures and wear jewelry. :) What helped with our son in keeping him away from the bandage is we went out and got him a cool mitten with some fun graphics and then we taped it around his wrist so he couldn't pull it off. After a couple days we didn't need to tape it anymore because he was used to it and actually asked to have it put on. So since it warmer out now maybe get her some pretty pink thin gloves or something just for a couple days or while she sleeps just to give the finger time to heal and scab over. Neosporin was a big part of the healing as well. Feel free to email me directly if you have any specific questions. good luck and give that brave little girl a hug!

You are doing a great job! It's a hard thing to see your child hurt. To be honest, sometimes my husband gets in the way when one of the kids get hurt. There's just something about the care and love of a mommy that helps to make things better. Some of the other things the other moms said can help; like the ice-cream, a cool bandaide, a popsicle, a special movie on the tv. One of the best remedies my kids like is when they curl up in my lap/arms and I hold them close and tell them how much I love them and how they are so brave and strong.

All you can do is to make sure the wound heals and that you fill her heart with all your love. And it seems like that is exactly what you are doing. Unfortunately accidents and boo-boo's follow children around like a magnet to metal.

I know what you mean. I too have had to go to the bathroom with a baby or toddler on my lap. I think Mom's are amazing creatures, I bet you have never heard a dad say he has done something like that! ; )
Give her lots of kisses and just make sure you keep it clean. Isn't being a mom an adventure?

As a veteran of many a flying run to the emergency room and seven bone fractures, horrible lacerations that required stitches, an infection that required surgery, etc., I understand how bad you feel. I always said I'd rather it be ME who got hurt because when they get hurt, it hurts us both. Accidents are going to happen and you've got many years ahead of you, there will be more and they will hurt you just as much as this one. Pat yourself on the back for being such a loving mother that it does hurt you, too. Not everyone is that way.

Dear M.,
What you have is a "mother's heart"! Whenever we have something happen to our precious little children, our heart breaks into a million peices. It somehow feels as if we should have done something to prevent it from happening. Of course, that is silly....we can't be by their sided 24/7.
As my kids grew up, I felt every hurt they recieved. I even had a hard time when they got shots that were needed.
M., there will be more times like this, as your children grow. It may be the hurt of falling down, the hurt from a friend being mean, losing a favorite toy, and when older, the rejection of a boy/girl that they like. All those things will hurt you as well. The only thing you can do, is to love them, and let them know that you will be there for them. And there will also be the wonderful times. You will see the excitment of being able to do something for the first time, the happiness of having a new friend, and yes, the joy in their eyes as they talk about having met the "right one", and seeing them married and happy.
There are so many sides of a mother's heart, but I wouldn't want it any other way!!
Give your little one an extra hug, and I hope her finger is better soon.

It sounds to me like you did everything right, without missing a beat. It is always hard to deal with things by yourself, and you are a strong woman to be able to do that. (Especially with such a nasty injury... you know the kind you only see, but it seems like you KNOW how that feels!!!) I am certain, also that it will grow back, without a hitch, and she will get over it in a matter of time. Kids are extremely versatile (more so than us, when we see them get hurt). We all feel your pain, But you did good girl! I lost my nail once... Well, it broke way down near the bottom, but I had to do the final tear, it was kind of hanging there... ANYWAYS I found the best way to soothe it was ice, some anti-inflammatory meds for the first little bit... I found it was more comfortable, also, if I stuck a big wad of t.p. (or sergical padding, your call) around my finger, so it was really fat, and covered it in bandaids (we all know when something hurts, we WILL whack it, a billion times a day... it's Murphy's Law).
Good luck, best wishes!

Maybe try explaining about how the longer the bandage stays on the faster the nail grows. And as soon as the nail is grown out, she can have her nails polished (little girl polish). Even from toddler age, my daughter LOVED getting her nails polished.

For that heartache you feel, I think you've gotten good support. But also know that it's a clear demonstration of your deep and abiding love for your girl. How blessed you are to be a mom. And how blessed your child is that you are her mom.

It brought back memories when i read you had to pee while holding her. I too have soothed my girl while using the potty, its what a mother has to do. The best medicine is what you are doing. The best medicine is mama and her love and caring. Keep it up and don't feel bad, we all have moments like this. I send you prayers.

Hi M.
Oh gal it is OK!!!! It is so sad when things like this happen. Our poor babies...But they mean the world to us & so when they get hurt we automatically feel guilty.

If you didn't feel bad then you wouldn't be human! Give her lots of kisses, hugs, movies, popsicles & more. She will be good as gold in a couple days!

Tea tree oil/salve will keep it clean & heal it too!

If you want to talk pm me. Sometimes it's nice for a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen. G.

Poor girl! Don't worry, every parent has a horror story and the first "major" injury is always traumatic for the child, and sometimes even more so for the parent. She's going to be fine.

My husband wasn't around for my daughter's first trip to the ER. She fell on a toy she was standing on, she had just got out of the bath, as I was going to get her off, she slipped and the corner landed right in between her legs...yeah, there. I spread her legs, and blood squirted me in the face!!! I couldn't freak out no matter how much I wanted to, because I knew it would scare her. The worst part was trying to console her, call 911,prepare to go to the ER, do paperwork once we got to the hospital, all while trying to comfort my daughter. 18 stitches later, my husband showed up pretending to be the hero. I was relieved and angry he was there to take over at the same time.

My point is, these things happen, you definitely aren't alone.

So sorry to hear about that. The only thing I have to say is this, years ago I was working on a truck with my husband and I smashed my finger, the nail turned black and about 90% of it fell off. The intial hurt (the throbbing)tends to go away in a few days but the finger itself stays very tender till the nail is back. Mine was my pointer finger and I got use to doing everything with my finger up just because even trying to use it to do something simple was so sensitive. So don't be to suprised if in a month from now she is still hurting a little now and then. Good luck.

It is always hard with the first child. My heart can just feel your pain right now. Actually, my oldest is 18 but I still feel upset when my 5 year gets hurt. A mommy is always a mommy. Sometimes the sympathy, along with the hugs and kisses, is for mommy too. Little girls are always drama queens. When my daughter got hurt I could hear her screaming at the other end of the block. It actually probably looks worse than it is. Just make sure that you let her know that she is a really big girl. (Kids like all the attention that they can get) Call grandma and tell her about the issue and how big your daughter is being. Make sure dad knows all the details. Cutsie band aids will be great. Maybe just wrap it a little bigger so everyone can see it. When you wrap it up, just make sure all the air is off and things should progress nicely. Hope it all works for you!!

Yes, you deserve some sympathy, because it's very hard to see your child hurt and in pain. Of course, this sort of thing happens a lot! However careful you (as well as everybody else) are about your child - or anyone else's child - accidents happen.

This is a time you can use to teach your daughter that when we get hurt, it's certainly okay to cry, and then we can get curious about it. Two-year-olds can't handle big explanations, but they can handle, "Yes, you have a funny finger right now," and "We'll have a good time seeing your fingernail grow back this summer." Cute band-aids are terrific! The idea is for her to begin to learn that accidents are just part of living and that we can smile after we cry. Lots of hugs, lots of kisses, lots of encouragement to go right back on the play yard equipment (even if you go on it first).

My younger son, at about the same age, pulled a drawer completely out, and when it fell it smashed his toes; he didn't lose the toenails but they were certainly an interesting color for a long while.

I've found it helps to try to get the child (and yourself) into the curiosity mode. It's hard to be scared for yourself when you're curious about something.

One of my daughters burned the palms of her hands when she was three. We helped her remember to be careful with them and keep the bandages on by using gloves. I suggest some that she likes a lot or dress up gloves.

Your daughter is a lucky girl. You have been willing to do everything to comfort her (even taking her potty with you), and you have the sense to have your pity party and then move on. When she sees you give yourself a short time to feel bad, then get up and move on quickly, and even getting some support women who've been there, she'll learn the same skills. These are life skills that are so important for girls.

I remember some of my most challenging days as a mom. My husband has worked crazy hours most of our marriage - graveyards, swing shifts, back-to-backs, doubles, you name it. He was working graveyards when our 2nd was born, and being super-pregnant with a high maintenance toddler at night was difficult. We worked swing shifts when our 3rd was born, and I was all alone with 3 little kids, one a newborn, and a mastitis infection -- ugh. But we are strong women. My kids are in school now and I can enjoy a bit of time without them, and enjoy time with them when they come home. Hang in there, you'll get through the challenges, and they make the good times all the sweeter!

Oh I am sure she will be fine. My brother dropped a huge rock on my hand when I was 4/5 and my finger nail popped off. I kept a bandaid on it and it was fine. I would just not bring any attention to it. The more you pay attention the more she will think about it and it will hurt more. It will take about 3/4 weeks to grow out. It will stop hurting in a few days I am sure.

I wish you hubby had been there too. Sometimes we just need a shoulder to hold us up when we help our little ones.