I have four kids, 2 boys, 2 girls and I would like to know if it is common practice for coaches to tell a teen that is midway through a Varsity Football season to move to JV? My son is 17 years old and a junior, and on varsity Football. He has played football for three years through high school and also played before that in Junior High. The Varisty Coach has played him several times this year on and off but it seems that if he misses a play or makes a mistake, the coach immediately scolds him and removes him from the field and benches him. He does this to other players except what would be classified as the "star players" of the team. Those guys can screw up all day long but remain in the game 100% of the time. Recently, during a practice, my son was cornered by the Varsity Coach and was told to step down to JV. Flustered, my son did not know how to respond, so he packed up his stuff and walked to the JV side of the field and continued to practice. MIstake on my son's part for being too passive but he said he was completely blindsided. The next day, we see the JV coach's own son, who has been on JV this whole time, playing on Varsity and in my son's position. What the heck is this? None of these coaches have explained this to my son, nor have they tried to speak to me as a parent to let us know why all of this transpired. I think we are owed an explanation at the least. I also find this move in poor taste and it has now caused what was once a peaceful time to watch my son’s games, turn into gossip in the stands, questions to me about why he is on JV, and drama that is slowly escalating at every game as to what is going on. Do coaches really have this much latitude and boldness to do something like this and not have to explain it? I’m not questioning the coach’s ability or overall decisions….but I am questioning HOW this was handled and WHY I was never told by him. If you were me, what steps would you take now and should I approach this coach for some answers? Please help.
Yep, happens all the time. But, it's still not right.
Star players always get preferential treatment and unlimited playtime.
Politics, and sometimes money, has a lot to do with it.
You might try speaking with the coach and/or the schools athletic director.
Good luck.
Yes, in my experience it depends on the overall culture of the school.
Does your husband have any thoughts on how to handle this? Would he be willing to approach the coaches and get a feel for what to do next, if anything? If you do it - things may get worse. Football coaches seem to have an inherent dislike of "overbearing" mamas . . . (not that you are).
Good luck.
Have you tried calling the coach? I have young children, my oldest is 9 so I have not delt with this. After trying to talk to him can your son ignore the drama and play for the other team? Maybe he will be happier in the long run in the move. As for the coach's son you can talk to the coach or does the school principal have any say? Talk to your son about being the bigger person no matter how this goes work hard and keep loving the game.
Good luck to you both!!
Happens all the time. Your son is likely still good enough for Varsity... But the coach wants HIS son to play Varsity now.
M.,
My advice is if your son loves the game advise him to do his best in the "new" position. Show all concerned, coaches, players, spectators and parents that he is the bigger man. If not, he should leave the sport.
Life is full of disappointments, it's up to the individual whether they let things get the best of them or turn them into a character building, learning experience.
Blessings...
Yes it has happened. Some coaches ride the non-'star' players harder and the slightest thing can send them back.
I don't think its out of line for your son to ask the coach for a meeting after practice just so that he can understand what happened and he can change what was wrong, etc. I think I would have him approach the coaches first. Then if you or he are still unhappy with the answer, ask for a meeting for yourself. You have a right to know what was wrong.
As for the gossips in the stands, just say that you don't know why. the coach didn't like something at practice and sent him to JV. That you are still waiting for an explanation, and leave it at that.
At least your son is being given the chance to keep playing, even if it's on a lower level. I played softball in high school, missed my sophomore (usually JV) year due to an injury, arrived to try-outs my junior year and asked to try-out for the JV team, since I knew I was behind a year and a bit rusty. I was told that I had to be on Varsity as a Junior and then was cut from the team during try-outs and didn't get to play at all. If your son really wants to play, at least he still can and use this year to improve for next year.
It does happen not not without at least an explanation of "we think it is best if you move back to the JV squad for now". Your son should speak to the head coach and see what he has to say...calmly ask him what happended and what he can do to be back on the Varsity squad.
