How to Get My Kid to Stop Sleeping with a Nightlight

Updated on November 04, 2015
M.B. asks from Durham, NC
41 answers

My daughter is 11 and still sleeps with a nightlight. I am a little concerned. She wants to stop she says but she said she can't. I don't want to be mean and force her. I don't know what to do.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Wow, who cares? I like a nightlight in the bathroom. Not because I'm scared but so I can actually SEE when/if I get up in the night.
Seriously, why is this even an issue???

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J.K.

answers from Wausau on

A nightlight is a non-issue. There is no problem with it, and no reason that you need to get her to stop.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Why make her stop? She's only 11. I think if she needs it and uses it, then let her keep it. Who cares? Why are you concerned? Many ADULTS are still afraid of the dark. I say there are much bigger fish. Let her keep it.

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T.N.

answers from Albany on

Waaah? I'm 49 years old and still want a nightlight. How is this a problem?

:(

12 moms found this helpful

V.S.

answers from Reading on

I prefer to see where I'm going when I get up at night, so I always have a nightlight in the hall outside our room. If we are traveling and the room is too dark, I leave the light on in the bathroom or keep the blinds open to get street light. It's not like she sucking her thumb or something harmful. Why does she need not to have it?

ETA: OMG! harmful to eyesight? Seriously? Sleep cycles? At 4 watts? SMDH….

11 moms found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Maybe plug a night light into a light timer so it turns off after an hour or two.

At various times in my life I tried to stop sleeping with a stuffed animal.
Long story short - I'm almost 54 and I currently sleep with a bear my husband got for me.
If you've got to have a vice, sleeping with a stuffed animal is one we can all live with.
I suggest that maybe a night light might be something similar.

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

Unless it's a floodlight strobe that is doubling your electric bill to keep it lit, why is it a problem?

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D..

answers from Miami on

Please let this go. You are making a mountain out of a molehill. I know ADULTS who have a little bit of light in their rooms. It makes them feel more secure for MANY reasons. This is nothing to bother your daughter about. It's like kids who still sleep with a stuffed animal in their bed until they go off to college. Would you try to take that away too?

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

Why is this on your radar? She could sleep with a night light on for the next 90 years and it wouldn't matter.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Why is this an issue? Just let her sleep with it on and tell her there is no reason to not have a nightlight.

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A.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

Just let her do it.. it's not as big a deal as one might think... honestly, when my husband and son are away, I like to have one on.. The reason being, when asleep, if I hear something, I don't like to wake up in total darkness, and instead, prefer to have a little light.. it's just something that makes me feel better... and if it makes your daughter feel better, they hey, why not..

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M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

Why is it a problem? Who is making her feel bad for having it? I rarely sleep in a pitch black room and I'm 32.

If she wants something that is a little more grown up than the typical nightlight get her a Scentsy plug in or warmer...my daughter has one and uses that often enough....the light is calming and the scent also helps.

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K.C.

answers from Denver on

I know many grownups who like a bit of light during the night. I don't see what's wrong with letting her have a nightlight. Is it affecting her sleep? If not, no problem, let her continue using it. And don't make her feel bad for wanting a nightlight. It's really a non-issue.

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J.D.

answers from Dayton on

I don't get it, why do you think this is a problem?

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L.U.

answers from Seattle on

Let her sleep with a nightlight. What's the big deal?
I sleep with the fan on, every.single.night. If someone turns it off I actually wake up and turn it back on. Ridiculous!! lol
If she wants to stop she will do it on her own....but if she doesn't, I really don't see what the issue is.
L.

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R.B.

answers from San Francisco on

What to do: let her sleep with a night light. How is that harmful?

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B.B.

answers from Missoula on

I am 34 and have always used a nightlight. Why is it a problem, exactly?

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

i'm not sure why it's an issue, other than the helplessness she displays by wanting to but claiming she 'can't.'
forcing her wouldn't be a good parenting thing to do at all.
i'd try getting her a dimmer and just letting her dim it down more and more as her comfort level allows. empower her by making it her dealio.
my kids weren't scared of the dark, but my younger just loved lights. he's 24 now and still does. lava lamps, black lights, the ones that throw the universe onto the ceiling, ones that make the room look like it's under water, he tried 'em all, often several at a time. the last time he was home i sent him back with a bagful of orange halloween lights for his room.
maybe just encourage her to enjoy a little light in her room but wean herself from it being a necessity.
khairete
S.

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J.C.

answers from New York on

Let it be. So many people sleep with lights on and the TV on. A low light won't make a difference in a fairly dark and quiet room.

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A.N.

answers from Orlando on

This is not something to worry about! There is nothing bad going on here. So she still sleeps with a nightlight? So what? My son slept in pull-ups until he was 10. So what? Every kid is different. Let her have her nightlight, and please stop making a big deal about it, because you are going to give her anxiety about it.

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C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

I'm not sure why this bothers you. My 11 year old son sleeps with a nightlight. It does not bother me in the least. My 72 year old mom likes to sleep with a nightlight. I have to plug one into our guest bedroom when she comes to visit. I'm not sure why you care if you child sleeps with one or not. I have one in my bathroom attached to my bedroom and I leave the door cracked open so when I get up in the night I can see a little bit while I walk to the bathroom. I would let this go.

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M.P.

answers from Asheville on

Just let her sleep with a nightlight! I don't see the problem with it. I still sleep with one in my room, and I assure you I am not damaged because if it.

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J.S.

answers from St. Louis on

Why does she need to sleep in the dark?

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E.B.

answers from Austin on

What do you mean by "nightlight"? There are small plug-in lights with one of those small dim bulbs that provide a little bit of illumination so that one can locate the bathroom entrance or the door to the hallway. They often have little decorative shades and the bulbs are sold in home hardware stores and can be a soft blue or a pleasant yellow. I have nightlights in strategic places around the home; they're flat and a pleasant blue color and are there for maneuvering safely in the event that I need to get quickly to my daughter's room without tripping over something, or for getting a drink of water without stumbling into something. I bring a small nightlight along when we go to a hotel, as the bathroom light choices are usually only off and pitch dark, or brightly lit with a dozen bulbs. That way I can simply plug in a small nightlight and we can quietly and safely walk around the unfamiliar hotel room without turning on lights and disturbing the other family members who might still be asleep.

But if you're talking about leaving a bedside reading lamp on, that's a different issue. That could be disruptive to sleep. Let her choose a real nightlight with a cool design and plug it in somewhere in the room that's not right next to her bed but that offers enough light to be soothing to her. I don't see any problem with having a true "nightlight" in the room somewhere.

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Get her a dreamlight. It's a stuffed animal with a "nightlight" built in - there are different animals. It projects stars onto the ceiling for about 10 minutes if you set it that way, and they change colors. Then they go off. If the child is still awake, they can turn it on again. If they fall asleep, no battery power is wasted. You can find them at Target, Costco, wherever. The light isn't super strong, but it's bright enough to be reassuring.

It has a setting where you can set it to stay on, but that just eats battery power.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

I suggest you do nothing. She'll quit when she no longer needs the nite light. My 12 and 15 yo grandchildren still have a night light. My grandson, 12, says he's scared without one. My granddaughter doesn't say why, just that she turns one on sometimes. Having a night lite is OK.

I leave a light on in the bathroom so that I can see and be oriented if I wake up.

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J.P.

answers from Lakeland on

I am 45 and have two night lights in the house, the master bath and my daughters bathroom. My husband also leaves on the small light under the microwave so he can see in the kitchen if he gets some water.

I don't see how having a night light is a problem. It really doesn't have anything to do with being afraid of the dark, it's just about being able to have a little light without it keeping anyone awake.

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X.Y.

answers from Chicago on

Pick your battles, this isn't worth it and stop making her feel bad

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Z.B.

answers from Toledo on

I don't sleep with a nightlight simply because I like sleeping in the dark. It's all about what you're used to. I just prefer it this way, and so does my husband. No big deal.

There's nothing wrong with sleeping with a nightlight either. Both ways are just fine.

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D.B.

answers from Boston on

This is your first question on Mamapedia, so we don't have any context about your or your child.

Can you say more about why this is a problem? I'm not sure why this is not sustainable. I can see if she were to go camping, or if there were a power failure, there'd be no back-up plan. If she had a slumber party and too many other kids hated it, there might be a problem, but I think an equal number of kids would appreciate it. Hotels have nightlights in every room and bathroom, so it's not just a security crutch, it's an aid for getting up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom.

Please put more info at the end of your question, using "ETA" (Edited to Add) or put it in the "So What Happened" section so we know what your objections are.

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K.A.

answers from San Diego on

I am older than 11 and I still have night lights around the house either as true traditional nightlights you plug into outlets or lights from electronics and appliances. There is no reason to stop unless they are keeping her up from excess light which it doesn't sound like there is. Some people just sleep better with a low light vs a blacked out room.

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M.G.

answers from Portland on

Personally I wouldn't care myself if my child slept with one. But you say she would like to stop. So you leave her door open and leave hall light on. Next week close the door most of the way, next week put a night light on out there ... You just do baby steps and wean her off it. Or you do it all in one go and remove it. Depends on your kid.
If it's her own desire to be done with it, let her lead where she is eleven. Why is it important to her to give it up? Until you know why for wanting to change behaviour it's hard to advise. Would she be scared without it? Or is it peer pressure from sleepovers? My approach might be different depending on the reason behind the need to stop.

ETA if it's you forcing the issue with your concern (just reread your question) then I would back off let her lead it when and if she's ready, nothing wrong with a night light. And you will only stress her out.

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D.T.

answers from Muncie on

Twinkle lights are "cool" for a tween's room. They give off "little" light. I had glow stars. Not sure if they're still "in" or not, but enough of them can give off enough light at night to act as a nightlight and they fade after time, no electricity used. A lava lamp can also give off a small amount of light and looks more "adult". I grew up with night lights in the hall and in the main bathroom, so we could see where we were going if we got up in the middle of the night.

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N.Z.

answers from Los Angeles on

Let her sleep with the sleep light. She'll eventually get over it. My parents let me sleep with the hallway light on until I was a senior in high school. I don't think it caused any lifelong damage. I sleep fine in the dark now. In fact, I now prefer COMPLETE darkness -- I hate even a little bit of light.

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J.H.

answers from New York on

I see where you are coming from. My 11-year old son only quit using his a few months ago. My concern was that he liked it to be right next to his bed, and it really seemed bright in the middle of the night so I was pretty sure it wasn't good for his sleep patterns (he has Tourette's and his tics can get really bad if he doesn't get enough sleep).

We have a nightlight in the bathroom that is in the little hall that all our bedrooms open out to, so that gives some middle-of-the-night light.

He has two packages of glow in the dark stars on his ceiling, but it was really hard to see them with the nightlight on. They looked totally cool with it off, and I would tell him that and would sometes lie in there with him with no nightlight just to look at them. So I guess at some point he just decided he wanted to see them too.

Good luck. You may want to try the glow in the dark stars, or even a nightlight that goes off after a couple hours (like someone mentioned below) to try to wean her off.

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C.B.

answers from Reno on

We have a night lights in the kiddos rooms (10 and 13) and one in the bathroom. They are very low light (scentys). They are by there doors and if and when they don't want one then they don't have to have one. I really do not see where there is an issue

Blessings

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R.K.

answers from Appleton on

I'm 60 and have ambient lighting all over my house. Unless there is a power outage my house is never dark.
Not a bit deal in my opinion. I just like having a little light all over my house. If something wakes me I want to know if someone is there.

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O.H.

answers from Phoenix on

You let her have her nightlight. there is nothing wrong with it and you need to tell her that. Many of us have our "things" that we need to help us sleep. I have a fan blowing on my head and blackout curtains. I don't even like the light from the clock. lol My husband says we sleep in a cave. No biggie. Just let her keep it and if she is stressing because she thinks she shouldn't have it put her mind to rest and tell her its ok. Good luck.

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N.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I'm 56 and have a night light in my bathroom. It gives my bedroom a little bit of light so I can get up and around to the bathroom if I need to.

There is no logical reason to not have a night light if you want one. I'd tell her to stop worrying about it and that it's perfectly normal for people to have night lights if they want one.

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S.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

I don't actually have any advice. I am just surprised at how many people say it's ok to use a night light or sleep with one themselves. I have always been under the impression that it was unhealthy to sleep with a light on because of sleep cycles, but also because it can damage eyesight in children. It has never been an issue here as we all like to sleep in the dark. We do have a nightlight in the hall for when we get up at night. Maybe you can get her to move the nightlight to the hall and let her open her door a crack?

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T.D.

answers from Springfield on

my dad made me put it in the bathroom. he used 2 small bricks to hold the door in place and moved it closer to closed about an inch a night till the door was closed. the night light was still on for about a week (for potty reasons) and then the bulb died and he never replaced it.
i was 10 when he did it, and since the door moving was so gradual i don't remember noticing it being moved.
i am now in my 30's and need it to be dark to sleep

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