Help .. My Daughter Likes to Go Outside by Her Self

Updated on April 10, 2007
A.L. asks from Traverse City, MI
7 answers

yesterday my four year old got up before i did .. and went out side by herself and i couldnt find her for about two hours ... when i finally found her i was sooo mad and happy at the same time i didnt know how to handle the situation ... i wasnt sure... so i explained to her what she did was wrong ... and told her would could have happened ... but she did it again today .. i dont know what else to do .. it isnt like i wake up late... i get up around 8am every day ... any ideas???

thank you
A.

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So What Happened?

So i just wanted to let everyone know that i sat down with Mia and told her that she was a big girl but she still need to talk to mommy before she just runs off like that ... and that if someone would have taken her .. then she would be sad and so would i .. i told her alot of things i didnt have to scare her i think she got the point.. because when i asked her if she understood .. she started crying and saying she didnt want to be taken from me ... i wasnt planing on scaring her i dont like scaring her but i just thought she need to understand .. i wasnt mean to her .. but thank you for everything you said to help me out ..

More Answers

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M.H.

answers from Detroit on

Hi A.,

I went through this exact thing with my 4 year old son. I woke up and was calling him and he was not responding and the doorwall was still closed and locked. Apparently he went out the side door and opened the garage by hitting the button next to the door in the garage. I found him on our deck in the backyard playing nicely. I was so scared, but at the same time I knew that he knew to stay close to the house. We don't have fences where we live so that made me a little bit nervous. When I found him I told him how he scared me and that he is not allowed to do that ever again. That he is to wake me up and ask me if he can go outside first. Well, he is 5 now and he never did that again. He has been asking me ever since. Not every parent has to "scare the hell of their child" (as someone else said) to get them to listen and understand. You just need to explain to them what would happend if they wandered off alone..like a stranger could take them or they could get lost and then their Mom or Dad woud have a hard time finding them. That way they'll understand how important it is to ask Mom and to let her know where you are at all times. Good Luck

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M.T.

answers from Detroit on

I have 4 1/2 yr old triplets and I went thru this with my daughter (have 2 boys and a girl) at about 3. You can either put one of those plastic things on the handle of the door (they are a pain in the butt though) or you can always buy these little alarm things from the store that stick to the door and the frame and when the connection is broken it makes this awful alarm sound. It is very loud and would definately wake you. Hope this helps and it will pass.

M.

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J.G.

answers from Detroit on

hey,
have u consider one of those lil chain-lock things (you know the one that one peace goes on the door frame and the other peace goes on the door it self and has a small chain to it) or try a child's gate

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A.I.

answers from Lansing on

hello A.
how are you doing today i would be scared out of my mind if i woke up and could not find my child for two hours .i would by the alarm that go on the door they are great the noise is so loud or maybe get one of the ky dead bolt but what ever you do do not put any lock what so ever on your child door if child protective services are ever called on you you could lose your child .so i would go with the alarm and maybe put out a snack for her in her room before you go to be good luck hope this passis soon

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K.W.

answers from Jackson on

Whatever you do, do not put anything on the childs door to keep the child from getting out of her room. I put one of those safety covers on my sons door when he used to do that and protective services said I was endangering my child. If you put up a lock, make it on the front and back door. Good luck hun.

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J.H.

answers from Detroit on

Hey A.,

If it helps an idea would be to put a slide lock or hook and eye lock as a last resort on her door where she cant reach it. This obviously would be for saftey only since you get up around the same time. And leave her something to play with in her room. Otherwise I would suggest something that makes noise tied to her door so you would be able to hear her when she tries to sneak out. Hope this helps and I don't sound crazy :)

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T.S.

answers from Kalamazoo on

A.,
I have to agree with the slide lock up top of the doors leading outside ( put them as high as possible tho) and add baby monitors just in case a stool or chair is within her range of ideas... (my son climbed a 6 ft high ent. center at age 3 where i found him on top only cuz he was laughing).... locking her bedroom door is not legal nor safe (HUGE fire safety issue).... try the locks and monitors
T.

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