Help - Warren, OH

S.,

Do you have an attorney? Has ie been determined by the court that you both have custody?
If you have grounds for you concerns, other than family drama, you could get supervised visitations.

On the other hand, I can understand your frustration, but they are looking out for their son, you'd do the same for you daughter if she went through this.

I don't think they don't care about your daughter either, sounds like they may be a bit too nosey but you can set clear boundaries with them.

You can simply tell them that they can ONLY see her when your ex has them and the rest of the time they'll have to deal with the situation.

Always be respectful but very clear even if you have to write it down to read it on the phone when you tell them your boundaries.

Also, either your ex is a total push over or you're trying to put the blame somewhere and the likely candidates are his parents, I also know there are some parents out there that know NO boundaries but you can live peacefully setting limits with them. You could also take advantage of their desire to be with her and use them as baby sitters ;)

You are very young and I know at your age I didn't know how to handle human relations as well as I do now, I will be happy to walk you through any situation with logical advice on how to handle situations with them.

Be patient, as time passes this will be behind you and they will always be grandma and grandpa, your daughter is fortunate to have them if they are good to her and you will really benefit from allowing her to be loved by others ;)

Why are you still living with this man? My first advice would be to get out of that home. Move out on your own. If you and him are living together there really is no such thing as 'your' weekend and 'his' weekend. That said, if it is your weekend to have your daughter, you don't have to let his parents have her. The law will back you up on that. Just tell them no. You can't stop him from taking your daughter to see her grandparents. They can complain all they want about the amount of child support their son has to pay, but he still has to pay it. If the court assigned an amount, then he has to abide by it. The law's pretty black and white on that one. If he with holds support, you can have his wages garnished, if they're not already. You're in a hard position. I'm wondering if his parents had something to do with your break up? Maybe you two can get some distance from his folks and try to work things out, if that's what you want. Also, inform your lawyer of your concern that his parents may try to take your little girl. Perhaps there is a way that you can make sure all their visits are supervised. Good luck to you! Stay strong!

In laws suck. that being said you have every right to do whatever you want with your child when she is with you but you can not tell him that he can't allow his parents to see her, grandparents actually do have rights though they are not easy to come by in Ohio in a court. As for child support a lot of women never file for it, but at the same time you have the right to do so and now that it has been done, short of his parents getting an attorney and taking you to court for some form of visitation and having the judge order a lower amount there is nothing they can do about him having to pay. they can be as mad as they want but it will not change anything. and generally a judge will not be happy with No child support, though if he does see his child often and does support her fully while she is there, this meaning all her food, clothing, diapers, ect while she is with him, a judge might take that into consideration and lower it some but even something like that is generally only going to happen if both parties agree or there is a really good reason. good luck

Well, S., quite honestly the grandparents of your child do have rights to be grandparents. They don't have the right to 'call the shots', but they're not just going to drop off the face of the earth just because you want them to (and boy, how many people out there would love for their in-laws or partner's parents to do just that?!?) Unless they are being abusive toward your child, keeping your daughter from seeing her grandparents will do more harm than good over the long run. Children deserve to have contact and interaction with their grandparents (as long as it is appropriate and healthy).

It sounds like you are concerned about their behavior towards their grandchild. Start documenting everything and consult with an attorney. No matter what you do, always remember that this is about your daughter and her best interests. When you make the decision to have a baby, you also get the unfortunate baggage of sometimes-overbearing grandparents that comes along with it.

I went through the same situation with my husbands mother. She made my life a living hell!!!!!! It has been almost 6 years since she has touched my kids and we live in the same town. You and him made that child and it's your responsibility to keep that child safe and take of your child. Your child would be better off and plus you don't want your child around someone that acts like that and putting things in her head. been there done that. By the way there is no such things as grandparents rights. Trust me I've checked!! One piece of advice just follow your gut. good luck!

S.,

First of all, if you were never married to the father of your child, you automatically have full custody. Period. Do not let them bully you into thinking otherwise.

If the father wants - he can take YOU to court. I would recomend calling the Juvenile court for a copy of your county's parenting schedule. Usually it is ONE day out of the week and every other weekend. It will also give you a breakdown of holidays and age appropriate visitation times. Do not let them have her more often then scheduled, unless it is a special occasion. If you follow this to the letter, and prove that you are being coopertive, they have no reason to make you do shared parenting or give up custody.

Second, he HAS to pay child support. Through the child support system. The only way child support will lessen his responsibility is if you are taking care of her less than 1/2 the time. That is why you need to be keeping to the schedule.

You are under no obligation to work this out with his parents. If you can, I would consult a lawyer, just as a precaution. But bottom line - get a backbone and DO NOT let them bully you.

Good luck!
S.