First Graders

Updated on December 12, 2006
E.R. asks from Medford, OR
4 answers

Hello. My daughter is a very outgoing child and makes friends easily. She will go up to just about anyone and start up a conversation. My daughter came to me last night with a 'problem she wanted me to fix'. She said that her favorite thing to do at recess is jump rope... not by herself but with friends. But she said that she ends up fighting with the girls that play jump rope. She said they have fought 3 times about 'the jump rope is not tug a war'. So she said she is playing with others kids now, the games they want to play, and then when she asks them to play her game they don't want to. She is frustrated. She thinks nobody likes her because of her freckles. I LOVE them! I tell her how much I like them often and so do others. I don't know where she got this idea that they are ugly. I told her to try and make new friends, that everybody is different and she just needs to find someone that likes the games she likes. Any other suggestions??

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K.O.

answers from Portland on

That is so sad that girls just do that. I have 6 children, 2 of which are girls. It seems to be much harder for girls to make friends that are "good" friends. Everybody wants to be in control and be the boss. Unfortunately, she might just have to play what is being played and you will have to set up play dates which friends of her choosing and possibly monitor them so she can get to play some things that she wants. Playing at home has been the best opportunity for my girls to make good, long lasting friendships. The atmosphere in school is not always the best to foster sharing and fairness.

Merry Chrismtas and good luck! OH, tell your daughter that freckles are gorgeous!!!! :)

1 mom found this helpful
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R.B.

answers from Sacramento on

Hello,
My daughter just turned 7 and this sounds like a typical scenario at school, especially with girls. I really think it IS just a stage and they will find their niche. Just keep telling your daughter how beautiful she is and tell her to try to just play with people that are "fun", no matter what game they are playing. Tell her to practice jumping rope by herself and usually someone will come up and ask if they can jump too. Then all of a sudden there's a couple people jumping rope. It's normal for kids to fight. I am always dealing with this with my daughter. She is very outgoing also. Positive encouragement will win in the end. Just be patient....

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K.D.

answers from Portland on

Try talking to her teacher about ways you might BOTH be able to help her. Since the teacher is with her during much of her waking hours AND during the time when the "problem" is occuring, it's important he/she knows.

Try books like My Nose, Your Nose by Melanie Walsh, Different Just Like Me by Lori Mitchell, and The Only One Club by Jane Naliboff (this might be a good one for the teacher, too, that could help in the classroom). They are all books that will help your daughter learn to celebrate her uniqueness.

I'm with you; I love freckles. My mom is COVERED in them and always has been. I have my fair share but only one of my children has gotten any and they are sparse. I love summer, though, when all those little tiny freckles begin to appear across his nose and cheeks. My dad used to tell me they were fly poop. Nice. I've told my children they are the marks left behind when magic fairies visit at night. Remind your daughter, though, that making freckles is pretty cool, though. Not everyone can do it and you can't just decide to do it if you can't!

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S.M.

answers from Chico on

My niece is 7 and has hated her blonde hair and thinks the other kids don't like her because of that. :)

I had read somewhere that girls at this age are entering that "competitive" stage. They are starting to notice differences and the haves/have nots type of things. So, I THINK it's just a stage.

I think I read about this in Parent's or Parenting magazine.

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