Do I Have a Right to Be Frusrated?

omg i go through the exact same thing except no family relationship I alsp get paid 100 a week because i was told thats all they could afford half the time the mom goes shopping or just drops her off here and doesnt even go to work and still dont show up until 6 or so I get so mad . I also have everyon telling me I am being taken advantage of. Also i am struggling My husband does construction and the industry is really bad right now so i am trying to getmy own company up and going but cant because i babysit. Trust me L. I feel you....

L., it is frustrating. I feel sorry for you and the position you are in, here you are just trying to be thoughtful and now you are in a position where if you say something you could harm a relationship. Truth is you need to put boundaries in your relationships and like the prior request suggested a contract (of sorts) would be great but since one wasn't in place from the start you need to let your family know that you have some new requests. I suggest to polietly let them know that you need proper notice; otherwise you will not be available and will make other plans for your day. In child care you need to set schedules and you have your own agenda as well. You also need to take time for yourself so that you don't feel taken advantage of - perhaps trade a day of care or chose a day or two that they pick up early so you and your children can enjoy an outting too. I work at the YMCA in Bonita it's part time my shifts are 3-4 hours my kids come to work with me and I get a free membership and free Child Watch; so if this continues to frustrate you put in an applictaion there if it is close to you. Anyway, good luck and most importantly put you and yoru family first. K.

Don't even get me started on family tonight, I am dealing with a similiar situation right this minute! You are being taken advantage of, who cares what they are doing if they were paying you enough, but they're not. Ask them to please inform you when she will be late and tell them you want more money. Period, they'll either anty up or have NO LUCK finding such great care. And thats coming from a daycare provider, because you are their family and i am sure you give the baby lots of care. Stay strong and good luck.

that would make me mad too! You should tell them what you need. Sit down and make a list of the way you need it to be. What is important to you. I don't think money is the only issue here. First, you seem to need at least one or two days to yourself and your kids. They may need to hire a sitter to come to their house while she works a few days and pay her. That will give you some time for your family. I would charge whatever daycares pay for the other 3 days you do. And also request that they call the night before if they aren't coming. (emergencies excluded) And put it all in writing. If they had to send their child to a daycare they would know what is expected of them. If it's not in writing, people forget and take advantage.
The point is, the problem will only build up and get worse. But they can't fault you if you have solutions to your problems you are having. They may be grateful even. You are doing them a great service by relieveing them of alot of stress because they trust you. Make them see that.

Actually you do have the right to be frustrated. Your in-laws could at least call. I'm a stay at home mom as well and I decided to do home day care to help bring in an income and my parents are required to call me if they are going to be absent or tardy, it's common curtesy.
A.

Hi L.,
You do have the right to feel taken advantage of. I was just talking w/my mother about the same situation that she has been placed in. She babysits my nephew @ no charge while she is temporarily laid off from work. She began babysitting my nephew(her grandson)part-time as a favor ,to save my brother and his girlfriend money and to avoid having him go to daycare @the age of 1yr. My mother is now having a difficult time making ends meet w/her unemployment income. Yet,she is still watching my nephew while my brother goes to work full-time and his girlfriend works part-time and goes out shopping w/friends. I understand that you don't want your neice to go to daycare. But,You also have to be more concerned about your children first. How many times have you put off going someplace w/them because there wasn't enough room for your neices car seat,etc. I am not telling you not to watch your neice. But, It is not fair for you to stay home w/her,while your sister is out shopping/on pleasure. (The solution to it all>>>) Try calling local daycares and inquiring about their fees. Then incorporate that into your fees.. I am pretty sure that they charge more. Then tell your sis & BIL that you are unable to babysit when they arrive late. However, You will be charging them the same flat rate (w/the new increase). You may also want to use their car when you have to take the kids out. Perhaps it has alittle more room. If you use your sister's car... She'd have to stay home and work anyway-so that's a plus too (just don't leave your car keys w/her)! Trust me...They will learn to arrive on time and you will be able to spend more time with all of the children.They will learn to be more punctual and understanding. This will be benificial to everyone in the long run.

Hi L.
Yes you do have a right to be upset.Here`s the promblem though if you are starting a business from home or are you just planning to take care of your niece?? Because if you are doing a childcare business then you should have a contract or some type of policy in place if not these things will happen and remember family is always the worse clients because they feel they can.Let them know that u dont like these things and they should respect you and your family.

Hi L..

The going rate for full-time care in a daycare for a 11month old can be anywhere between 145-165 a week. They definitely should be paying you more or quit acting like you should cater to their shopping plans, decorating plans etc. because it sounds like you are trying to be nice and do this as a favor yet they are taking advantage of your kindness. You should definitely set a strict rule about dropping off no later than a specific time in the morning, and they should call ahead of time if she will be absent. They need to understand that you also have a family and you could be using the time waiting around for them to be with your children! I had a similar problem about the carseat not fitting in my car of a little girl I would care for. And I would make outside activities, kiddie pool, bubbles, walking to a local park to keep them busy and out of the house for a while. Good luck and put your foot down!! :)

I would definately ask them to set a time, then if they are late, not be there! I agree with everyone else, that you need to put your foot down, but do it in a loving way that Business and Family are 2 different things. If you are accepting money, that is Business!