Disrespectfulness

It sounds like he is going through his independent stage. He just wants to see how far he can go. Be firm but gentle. You need to show him that yes he can make his own decisions... but there may be consequences. He also needs to know that disrespect is not tolerated. Hope this helps!

I dont know if this will help you at all. I wouldn't be to concerned about right now. If an incident occurs where he becomes disrespectful, I would tell my son that is not nice and let it go, but correct him each time it happens. It may just be a phase and it will blow over before long. My son is three he is not disrespectful, he just pretends not to listen to me and his father.

my daughter was like this at one point, we did time out and talking to her, we had to tell her alot about it and it seemed at first it was almost pointless b/c it didnt seem to work but eventually it did and she didnt try to push her limits anymore, all children go through this i think at one point, they like to see who's boss :) Good luck

L., like most everyone has said, it is a part of growing up. He is exercising his new found ability to express his opinion. He's testing his boundaries with you and your fiance. Just be consistent and firm with him and he will learn what is acceptable behavior.

I doubt if he is doing it to be disrespectful. Raspberries are just a silly thing that they learn to do with their mouth, and he's probably pretty proud that he accomplished this "skill". In another year or two it might be developmentally appropriate to start teaching him that it's rude; for now just don't give it any attention one way or the other. As far as the hitting, I would stick to telling him that hitting hurts, we don't hit people, hands aren't for hitting, etc; and distract him with something else to do. A one year old is not old enough to understand the purpose of a timeout; he cannot connect it to the action that he's done and he will end up hurt and confused as to why mommy and daddy are ignoring him. I think the bottom line is though, no matter how you deal with it it's not going to stop right away. Toddlers just don't work that way. ;)

L.

How old is your son? One? Anyway, he is not showing you disrespect...believe me...that's the only way he knows how to express himself right now. I am now getting my 18 month old son to be a LITTLE more respectful but he is a good son all in all...so be patient and just be firm but nice about it...when correcting him. He'll get the picture...but mainly BE PATIENT...and give the little guy a chance.

good luck
Kelly

I have a 1 yr old as well....Dont yell at him about the raspberries...they are just testing there capabilities with there tounge and mouth. As for the hitting, I wouldnt yll at that either, just get down to his level on the floor, and firmly state to him "NO HITTING"...He will prb cry, but dont feed itto it...JUST WALK AWAY....Let him know you mean it!!!! I simpley, but firmly just state the facts with a one yr old...Not explaining at this point, but just stating the NO's...for example...they throw there cup...I say...you dont throw your cup...and I take it...Hitting...I say no hitting...screaming...I say no screaming..if they dont listen they suffer the conseq......whether it be sitting on the floor in the corner, or taking there cup away for a while, or placing them in the pack n play and letting them scream....

L.,
You're son is just going through a normal stage of growing up. He has no concept of what disrespect is and isn't intentional in his behaviors. He knows there are certain expectations regarding his behavior, he just doesn't know what they are. So he is basically testing his boundaries to figure out exactly where they are. As long as you are very consistant with him, this will pass. Also, when you ask him to do something, he may not understand. It may be necessary to help/show him what you need him to do.

Good luck!!
T.

Hi,

The independence he is starting to show is good, but the hitting is a concern (I would not worry about the raspberry). The worst thing you can do is reinforce the behavior by yelling at him (gives the behavior attention). I would suggest using I statements (I don't like it when you hit because it makes me feel . . .). Then I would calmly send him to time out for a set period of time. If it is continuous, I would ignore it, then the next time he asks for something, you say no.

The thing that I wondering, is where did he pick up this behavior? Did he get it at school/daycare? What TV shows is he watching, etc. My son, who loves spongebob watched the spongebob movie (which was far more violent than the tv show) walked around for two weeks threatening to pull off our arms because that happened in the movie, so they do pick up a lot of what they watch.

What you also have to remember is that he is not being disprespectful on purpose, but trying to forge independence. (I had to have this talk with my husband as well.) You have to remember every behvior of a child that age is designed to get attention, negative or positive. He may feel like he is not getting enough attention specifically from your fiancee. If I had to fathom a guess, I would say the behavior happens most when your fiance gets home from work and is trying to decompress, and not real emotionally accessable. If this is the case, you may want to have a routine where after a set period of time, your fiancee sits down with him to read him a story or something that is one on one time with the two of them. That may help the behavior dramatically.

Good luck.

L.

How old is he? If he is only one right now the only thing you need to do is tell him no and then distract him to a positive behavior. He is not disrespecting you, he is being a baby.

As one of the the moms said, he's not "disrespecting" you, he's just playing. You have to keep in mind that your child is a one year old. He's a baby. He has no idea what respect is. Children don't have a strong concept of right and wrong (meaning an actul understanding of it) until almost four years old. I think the most important thing for you to is change your way of looking at it. The rasberries will stop on thier own eventually and as for the hitting, just be pateint. Don't hit him back becuase then he's going to think its a game.

He is too young to "disrespect" you. He doesn't know what it means or what he is doing. I would suggest you either ignore it or quietly get down on his level and say to him that it is unacceptable. Time outs don't work this young. He is just testing his boundaries and seeing how far he can get. Just wait...it gets worse. The Twos are coming!

I hate to tell you this but it is just a part of growing up. Your son is showing you his independence and trying to make his own decisions. It will probably get worse before it gets better. thats where time outs come in to play. although I have found that at 1 they are still too small to respond to a time out, that works better when they are 2 and over. For the mean time when he does mis-behave try to talk to him and tell him firmly no, Other than that try to keep your cool, know its nothing personal just part of growing up. an excellent book I read on behavior was called "siblings without riverly" (sp?)although you only have one child there was many different and creative ways of talking to children and managing behavior. It was very helpful. good luck with your little guy. When it gets really bad try to remember 1 really good moment with him and keep that in your head. It is hard not to lose it when they can be so bold! If you want to chat more feel free to email me.

All kids go through a "testing boundries" stage. It usually lasts a while & will change as time goes on. For example, he's 1 now & is blowing raspberries & hitting. Once you get him over that, he may start slamming doors, or asking over & over again for the same thing even though you've already answered it. I found that if I just rode it out & corrected & maybe used time-outs, most of it was just about not giving in on my part & never letting them get away with it. Good luck!