Caffeine Article

It is very difficult to do, but I had to go face to face with my mother-in-law over respecting my parental requests. These were issues of health and safety, (she didn't believe in car seats)not simply wants or desires. I let her know that she wouldn't be seeing my son alone until I knew she would follow my rules. It took probably 2 years before I ever left the room when she was in it and close to 5 years before she ever babysat again. But it worked.

J.,

I'm assuming that you are speaking of relatives and just not wanting to put it out there. (If you are speaking of non-relatives and/or non-parents who obviously don't understand the nutritional black hole they are creating, I would tell them in no uncertain terms that they have no business introducing any kind of food or drink to my child without my permission, healthy or not.)

I think everyone goes through something with their parents or in-laws regarding what is acceptable fare. My FIL wanted to give my son ice cream, cake icing, whipped cream and all kinds of other junk before he was a year old. "Just a taste," he would say, "I did it with my children." I think he wanted to enjoy my child's reaction to the sweetness. (This will seem harshly worded, but I don't hold with the idea that my children should perform like trained monkeys for anyone. Not to mention that my children were on special formula for digestive problems!)

I told him that I respected his decisions for his children whether or not I would have agreed with them at the time, so he needed to respect mine. I didn't enjoy saying it because I like and care for my FIL. Things were awkward the rest of that day. It helped that my husband immediately backed me up so that we were a united front. It didn't happen again

I think that sometimes grandparents and relatives think that they have a sort of "co-custody" of the child because they are blood family and presume they have the freedom to make choices like that for them. While I'm grateful for the presence of grandparents, etc., in the lives of my children and look forward to the deepening of those relationships, I'm still the Mommy and maintaining their health is job one.

Good luck!

I agree with Jhenifer. Even with my mom or other immediate family, my motto is: "My kids, my rules". No, it doesn't go over very well most times, but it's catching on. That said, have you look at the American Academy of Pediatrics for specific articles or facts. There are just some people who only take to "expert" opinion on your kids.

I'm sort of on the fence with this one. I agree that people should be respecting your wishes when it comes to your child. However, I also agree that you may be overreacting just a bit. Don't get me wrong, I don't agree with people giving a baby ANYTHING except their own food and breastmilk/formula and water. I won't even let my MIL give my baby a taste of a sucker until she's a year old. Unless these people are spending a good majority of the time with your child, I really wouldn't worry about it all that much. Yes, you should continue to express your wishes that they respect your decisions as a parent. But I also agree that any "evidence" you present to them will most likely go in one ear and out the other.

Wow! You are the parent. That really should be enough! That's what you should tell them!

I love how you're the parent and yet you have to offer scientific proof to other people that they shouldn't give your one-year-old coffee and soda!

Talk to your doctor at your next visit and ask for info about caffeine for kids. He/she can probably give you some articles or else some strong words for the disrespectful folks in your life. Your doctor can even write a prescription for "no caffeine" that your can show to your relatives.

If that fails, you may just have to stop leaving your child alone with these people until they can learn to respect your wishes. If they complain, tell them it is because of they refuse to give you the respect you deserve as your child's mother. Not only is this filling your child's belly with empty calories, it is showing your child that your instructions can be ignored.

Good luck!

I totally agree that you are the parent and it is your business what you want your child to have and not have. If this is a situation that you seem to be in a lot, tell them you will stop coming there. If it is a caregiver, you can always find another place for your child. It really boils down to respect. If someone does something that you ask them not to do; they are being disrespectful. I would flip out too.

A lot of people just want to give the child new tastes. I'm with you, though. Caffeine is a no-no. I would look online for information regarding this, or try your library.

Did you say coffee? Someone gave your one year old COFFEE??? I would flip out. A one year old has no need for coffee or soda. Whoever these people are that are giving this to a one year old should be ashamed of themselves. Not to mention that this is your baby...what you say goes, period.

I have had issues myself with people giving my baby things I disapproved of. Most of these people were older and went by the philosophy that "we did it back then, and it was o.k." I don't know if that is the case here, but I would not be surprised if these people were older. But that is not the point. The point is you need to stand up for yourself. You should not need an article to prove your point. What you say goes, and if people don't respect that keep your baby away from them.

Good luck!

You can look for articles if you want, but I'd recommend getting the book PRESCRIPTION FOR NUTRITIONAL HEALING by Balch. It should be in EVERY home, just like a dictionary or Bible or encyclopedia. You'll find all KINDS of things in there.

It will tell you about the nutrients depleted by caffeine, the fact that it's a diuretic, etc. You should have NO problem finding it.

My real question is why would anyone be giving a one year old coffee or soda? Are these friends, family members, or are they idiots?
Sounds to me like they are in for a lecture and the statement if they can't follow the request not to do this they don't need to see you or the child for awhile.

I am so sorry people are not honoring your wishes. You are the mother, what you say goes! And while I dont have an article, I do know that caffeine is very bad, for children and adults (although I'm as guilty as the next person for consuming it!). There is absolutely NO reason a child should have pop or coffee. Caffeine is a known carcinogen and his little body cannot process it as quickly or efficiently as an adult. Do whatever you can to prevent him from having it. It will also disrupt his sleep, of course, which has lasting effects as well. Good luck!

If someone gave my 1 year old caffeine or soda, I would be very upset. My daughter is 3 and has never had caffeine or soda. The problem is that you are telling them not to do it and they are ignoring you. They are not respecting your wishes as the child's mom. I would not let these people see your child until they can respect your wishes.

I agree YOUR child YOUR rules period. I also agree you should let the "Momma Bear" out.

As a member of the American Dietetics Associoation, I would suggest referencing one of the miilion articles out there regarding caffeine (the mechanisms of action are the same in children as in adults). Caffeine is fine for healthy adults in moderation but much more potent in a child's small body. I'm surprised your child will drink coffee; but that certainly isn't a habit we'd recommend. As far as soda pop, the caffeine is a concern but what is worse is the sugar in soft drinks, including non-caffeinated types such as Sprite and 7Up.
Good luck. J.

How sad for you to be in an environment where no one respects your wishes concerning your child. I recently went through this with my son, finally they started drinking diet , caffeine free sprite. Too late though my son has dental caries, 11 to be exact. It upset me so much I refuse to let my son have soda pop, juice drinks, sugary treats of any kind, and I tell them why and I thank them for the help they have extended to him. He still has to have his teeth fixed but I made sure everyone knew the severity of their behavior and what it has cost this child. The dentist said he is not to have... and this is what has happened because of what he has had. So please don't give him any of this. Last night we went by to see one of his sitters, and she said she still had a bag of fruit snacks that she had been saving for him, see no matter what a working mom pays her sitter your child will never be cared for as well as what you would do for him at home.

I agree with most of the other moms--this is really not just an issue with the safety of caffine--it is a respect issue. All you should need to do is say my baby is not to have any coffee or soda and if you give it to her then i can not trust you to be alone with her--and stick to it! Sure back in the day they might have done this with their kids but they also did not put their kids in seat belts or car seats!

First off, I think you may be overreacting. Unless these people are force feeding her a pot of black coffee or a 2-liter of Pepsi, then they're not doing any harm to your 1-year-old. Do you feed your child chocolate milk? If so, then you're also guilty of feeding her caffeine. The only way caffeine would be detrimental is if she was already unhealthy or had liver or gastrointestinal problems. Caffeine is in more foods than we know of, it's just not called "caffeine". There's an article I found that might give you more information:

www.righthealth.com/topic/Foods_Containing_Caffeine/overv...

If you think about it, we do much more worse things to our kids than give them a sip of soda. Does anyone think that injecting our 3-month-olds with numerous viruses at one time is safe? Probably not, but we all do it because the doctor tells us it's what we're supposed to do. I'm not against vaccination, but I think there's a safer way to do it.

I hope this website is helpful to you. If not, I would also suggest checking out the American Medical Association on the subject. Good luck to you!

WHAT?!? Are you kidding? I would lose it! I am sure you can find lots of articles on the internet. It is crazy that someone thinks this is okay!

According to my ped the worst thing your could give a child is diet soda followed by regular soda. As I told my mom the doctor said no and I am their mother and I told you no. Take the child with you and keep saying no.Between the ages of 1-2 your kid's should only drink milk (unless alergies prevent), juice and water. Its your child and you have to set limits.

You don't need an article, you need to be more assertive! Who the heck gives a one year old coffee?? I, personally, wouldn't give a child that age soda (or pop as we call it). I rarely let my kids have pop and the youngest is 3!

Look up all the ingredients in the soda! High fructose corn syrup and artificial colors and flavors are just two of the ingredients that are very bad for you. Just do a search for each one. You'll be surprised at what comes up! I'd do a search for you to give you an example, but there's no soda available to look at right now.

Bottom line: YOU are the mom! YOU set the rules for your child. Any one who cares about you and/or your child will respect WHATEVER decision you make in regards to your child! If I were you, I'd do a search on how to deal with people who disrespect your role as a parent. Probably LOTS of articles out there on that!

Good luck!

~S.

I can't find the article I had right now but you are the BOSS of your child . You say NO CAFFEINE so that is the way it is.If they can't understand your methods of raising your child keep the child away from them. Soda is only over sugared water and food colorings, not good either.I never had a soda until I was about 8 years old at a slumber party it made me seriously ill.Don't drink the stuff now either.
I was given very warm coffee in a bottle when I was small to help control my asthma, it opened my air ways and help reduce the inflamation in my brochial tubes. However it was Dr. prescribed and never made me wired like it does adults.This was way back in the early 60's.It was also given to hyperactive children instead of drugs and it mellowed them out.Then the big drug companies came up with ritalin and such things.Caffeine has it's place in the world but demand it not be given to your child or tell them they won't see the child. You are doing what you think is right and I agree with you 100 %. Good luck .
Debbie

This sure hits me personally. I also requested that no one give my children pop/soda when they were young. I am shocked that anyone would consider giving the baby coffee! Firstly, I cannot understand any reason why people would want to do this, giving empty calories, gaining a taste for something that serves no purpose, and filling the belly so that nutritional food has no room.

This is going to require everyone to get on board. Ask them directly, what are you gaining by disobeying a rule that I have given about my child? Do I sneak behind your back and do something with your child that you would prefer that I would not? Ask them bluntly, "How does my rule against these items seem so unfair that you would disrespect me act against my wishes?"

I'm sorry to say, you need to make these people uncomfortable with their actions. It is absolutely inexcusable that they would not only act against your rule, but for something that does not benefit and is actually harmful to the baby!

My youngest will be 9 next month and my oldest just turned 11 this month. Both of them have the perfect weight for their height. Neither has received pop on a regular basis, and if I were to put the total amount of pop during their lives, they probably haven't had more than 2 cans total. They love milk, flavored milk, cranberry juice, regular water, and flavored carbonated water.

Compare this to some children that have had a lot of pop/soda over their lives. They may be overweight, have behavioral problems because their bodies build up a need/addiction and rebel when the need is not met, and may experience the high when drinking and a low when their body crashes. This does not mention the affects on their teeth. All that sugar laying on their teeth until they are brushed will work the cavities. Dentists are not cheap, and getting cavities when you can prevent them is silly.

I just do not understand why anyone would choose to disobey you on this. My best to you on this situation. I was fortunate that my family stood behind my beliefs on this (with some grumbling about being a bit of an overcontrolling mum, but after I put the pressure back on them on why I SHOULD allow this, they had no counter answer). I STRONGLY ADVISE that you always err on the side of caution when you are dealing with your child.

I also pulled the BIG CARD out and stated very clearly that if my wishes are not followed, I would not allow unsupervised visits with the children. I would not allow my children to be with someone that was actively working against my rules and/or damaging my children's health, which is what I believe this to be. This might be very difficult for you if you rely on these people to childsit for you, but I'd find a stranger that will abide then someone actively working against me.