Believe in God, but Then Don't?

Updated on June 09, 2011
S.J. asks from Cherryville, MO
24 answers

Just curious if any of you out there had a time when you belived in God, and then as you grew older changed your mind/beliefs? This is purely a curiosity question. And feel free to simply say "yes" or what have you, or elaborate on to "why" if you wish. Again, I am just curious.

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I am absolutely LOVING all of these responses. Thanks to all for taking the time to answer, and I hope there are more answers to come.

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M.L.

answers from Chicago on

Yes - I have experienced this. I've come to find it's normal - even those who go through seminary experience this as their faith is tested over and over and it's even expected by their guidance counselors so they may help them through it.

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K.G.

answers from San Diego on

Not me but my husband. I have no idea why and he says nothing inparticular changed his mind. I'm not very religious but it still makes me sad.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

Yes. It's hard to explain, so I won't. However, it's not out of an anger toward God or a hardened heart. It was just a part of my personal growth process... and I'm not done growing, so who knows?:)

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M.P.

answers from Raleigh on

I grew up Southern Baptist, "tried on" several different religions, and am now agnostic. Not to be confused with an atheist. I am not saying there isn't a god. I am just saying "I don't know". My favorite quote is from Bill Maher, who put it perfectly into words:
"Religion is dangerous because it allows human beings who don't have all the answers to think that they do."
That about sums it up for me.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

S.:

I've always believed in God. however, I was tested in 2004 when I lost two babies, one at 20 weeks and the next at 12/14...

I don't go to church, however, I do not feel that my relationship with God has anything to do with my going to church...

As I see the world today - I FIRMLY believe in God - I see miracles and things I just can't explain - I look at my boys and say a prayer of thanks to God...

There are times I question other religions - especially Muslim/Islam - as I don't believe ANY God would be a "vendictive" God and ONLY wants people to believe in THEIR God....I know there are extremes in EVERY culture and way of life.... But I FIRMLY believe in God....have since I was a kid and it only got stronger as I grew up and witnessed things in the world!!

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T.K.

answers from Dallas on

Have you heard that saying - there are no atheists in foxholes.

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R.K.

answers from Appleton on

I was raised Catholic, forced to go to Catholic school for grades 1-8. I never really bought into it though. I never believed in Baptisim, I don't believe that an innocent baby is born with sin.
In 1999 I met a new friend who was Wiccan and I started helping her research some stuff on line. The more I read the more I liked it, I converted to Wicca and have never looked back. Yes, I am an ordained minister.
I have always believed in a Supreme Being, now I call her Goddess.

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A.C.

answers from Provo on

It is comforting to me to read all the responses of others who are agnostic and say they now live without fear. That is exactly how I feel. I was raised in a very religious household. While I am sure that many people find religion and the idea of God comforting, it always terrified me. I remember obsessing over many "sins"- things that in hindsight are not a big deal at all and are only natural, but were "against the word of God" according to my church. I would often fall asleep crying over my "sins" or begging God's forgiveness- again. The church I was raised in was very big on emergency preparedness (a good thing) but because it was talked about so much, I truly always thought the end of the world was just around the corner. It really freaked me out. As I have become older, I find that I feel much more peace without those religious beliefs. I know that my parents and family worry about my "soul" and no doubt are sure in their minds that if I would come back to the church, I would be happier, but I know it is not the right path for me. I think that I am a better person without it: the choices I make are guided by what I believe is best for my family and for society.

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A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Yes, I grew up believing and fearing...

As I aged I realized the only reason I believed was due to the fear. Now I say I am Agnostic and live without fear.

Updated: I also allow my children to attend the same church I went to growing up...it's their choice. If they decide to believe I have no issues with that.

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M.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

I used to go to church all the time, I was raised catholic. I got married in the Catholic church, got my kids baptized and all. It took a few years after my son was born to question everything. My son has extreme special needs and I just couldn't understand why there is such a loving god that he would cause this much pain and heartache. I felt like I was getting punished for something. I don't push my feelings on my kids, I let them believe if they want to, it isn't my choice it is their's. There are other bits and pieces to the story.

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L.W.

answers from Dallas on

I have always believed however has it always been strong? Unfortunately not. Things/events happen that test it, sometimes to the brink but my faith is always there somehow. When I lost my mom unexpectedly to a brain aneurysm I questioned God. Why take someone so young and full of life?? But there are things in this life that aren't meant for us to understand. Only God knows. It took me awhile to come back but I did. I find that you always have to work on your relationship with God. God wants a personal relationship with you and the only way to get that is to have faith in him, pray and believe.

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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

Oh yes indeed! I grew up in a fairly secular family, was not baptised and never went to church. As I got older I thought a lot about the God thing, and decided there was indeed a divine entity. In the past two years I have lost my faith. Is it all just pie-in-the-sky, or as someone I know puts it, a great Santa Claus in the sky for grown ups? I want so much to believe. I want to see my dead relatives again. Isn't that what it's all about - humanity's fear of death? But then again, I find comfort in atheism. If there's nothing more, then there's nothing to be afraid of. Anyway, you can see what I mean about my own conflicts around this issue.

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L.N.

answers from New York on

yes, i grew up believing in God. God was part of me. then things started happening when I had trouble believing there was God, because if there was, then such terrible things wouldn't be happening. i stayed away from church for a decade. then, while self-examining, i realized, i didn't stop believing in God. I was just mad at God for giving free will to people. I realized it wasn't God causing tragedy. It's the people. We are the only ones capable of doing terrible things to each other. I accepted my feelings.

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H.G.

answers from Dallas on

Its not that I don't believe in god but I've got more" why" questions than answers.

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K.R.

answers from Sherman on

yep. very religious as a young person. but when i got older and look more objectively, i just couldn't justify all the ritual, and not thinking for my self (trusting bible blindly) that went with it.
now as an adult in my thirties, i find that organized religion seems to cause as much harm as good, as it is right up there with natural resources for the most common reason for war, and a justification for intolerance.

some people need a reason to be good. some don't.

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E.B.

answers from Seattle on

I was raised in a very religious family. My grand father was a Pastor. My mom was your typical Pastor kid.

My parents did what all parents how believe do. They made us get up every Sunday morning...get dressed up(which as I got older consisted of sweats and a tshirt)just to go sit around for three hours...this is how I would have described it to you had this question been answered by my twelve year old self.

As soon as I was of working age I got a job. I also made a point to tell my boss that I wanted Sunday shifts. I did just about everything I could to get out of going to church.

Note on the church...at the point I was an ''Active Youth'' the youth ministry had gone down hill. The kids were really rough around the edges and there was not a good base of adult support around us. There was a core group of us the chose to ''HATE IT TOGETHER'', meaning we did the youth activities but with an attitude.

As I got older, my parents stopped fighting with us on whether or not we would be joining them for church. They made the choice to let us figure it out...They had given us a good grounding for belief...they figure if I wasnt gonna run with it I would be sorry later or I would come around.

I was really the only one not interested(I am the middle of three girls)...I looked at everyone in the religious field as pushing and very greedy. I refused to see the good that really is in the middle of it all.

I was this way until I had my third baby. I am not sure what happened.. Where my ahh huh moment came from..and now I couldnt tell you what that moment even was. There have been so many that followed it...

It has taken me alot to get to the point I can own my values and religious beliefs out loud, other then my family and my best friend...all of the others in my life are non-believers(almost to the point they have really offended me with the mockery they through out there because they dont believe)So, I was always very timid to speak up when they were bashing religion. My husband was one of those people, here of lately though he has stopped and is even now to the point where he will help with the circus on Sundays so the boys can come to service with me.

I could care less now. If they start in with it..I just nicely ask them to tone it down. Still not wanting to totally turn preachy(I am a firm believer god is working through me to get peoples hearts to move...He knows I am not good with pushy..so he is slowly showing me the way). Everyone is entitled to their thoughts views and ideas of religion. Who am I to tell them who to pray too...If they are a really big bother to me and I feel that we just cant meet in the middle with things...I tend to not pursue the relationship any further then it is.

I still have lots of learning and many questions about god, religion...and how everything is suppose to function together. My dad has become my teacher, he(after cleaning up)went on a very HUGE spiritual journey. He would be up with the sun(sometimes well before) praying reading the bible and in communication with god. This went on for more then two years...I think if i asked he if he did it still the answer would be yes..but not as often as he has learned that he can be in communication all the time.

Totally lost your question in my answer sorry...This was a curiosity question...not a help me find my way question...I think though it is not the length of the journey you spent getting to god..It is the journey you have to look back on..once you have found him. Some people will never find him. I think the world needs a little bit of every belief to make it an interesting place. I have been bless though with the chance to have peace within a great relationship with God.

Thank you for this question..even if it was meant in fun...This has been quite a journey for me. One I never thought I would take. Totally happy that I chose to do so though.

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N.G.

answers from Dallas on

I was raised in the Catholic church, because that was my father's preference, and that's the way he was raised, but honestly, the entire time, I knew I wouldn't be Catholic when I was old enough to decide for myself. I married a Lutheran, which is about as close to Catholic as you can get and still be protestant, so of course I didn't like that much either. All this time, I never knew whether I believed in God or not. I thought that if I found the right way or place of/to worship, then I could better 'hear' God. Still, I felt like children raised with God are better off, so whether or not I believed in him, I raised my children as Christians. I brought them to the Lutheran church that my husband was raised in but then, collectively, my husband and I came to the revelation that neither of us felt like that church was where we belonged. We strayed from the church (and God) for a few years. We both began questioning His existence. At one point we toyed with the idea of labeling ourselves as 'atheist'. However, I still had that nagging feeling that I was doing a disservice to my kids by not raising them in the church. So, recently, we decided to try a completely different avenue. We went to a church that is not remotely related to the way either of us was raised. We both loved it. My kids loved it. We felt at home. My husband has renewed his relationship with Christ and every day my faith becomes stronger. It is still a work in progress but that is the way of faith. I rambled, but that's my ongoing story of my faith journey. haha!

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J.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

I can't say I ever didn't believe. But there was a time when I driffted away. During that time I became hostile towards God. But even when I contemplated not believeing, I'd consider my existance and realize, it could not have happened though evolution. But even through my hostility, He drew me back. I believe he spoke a word to me through scriture,
"the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so." Roman 8:7.
Thus started a pivital time in my life when I considered that my hostility was not valid, even though it was my feeling. That the real problem was not God, it was me, or rather my sinful nature. In the last 11 or12 years my heart has been softened. But even when I was angry and hostile towards God, I still believed.

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K.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

I have always believed... but I do have a friend that was raise in a strong catholic family and he no longer believes there is a god. In fact I would say he is one of the most in your face atheist I have ever met. His parents are still devout Catholics and I am sure they pray for him as I do (of course he thinks that is pointless).

According to him it is because he is so deep into science, how could you believe there is a god after devoting oneself to science. He is an physic engineer with a master that he dedicated to something in science proving there is no god and so on. The discussions about God or no god we have are circles upon circles of saying the same thing since neither of us is going to change our beliefs. I have come to just being there for him when he needs it, we are nice to one another but our friendship has fallen apart and I avoid any religious or atheist topic if at all possible.

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L.M.

answers from Chicago on

I can't say that I've stopped believing in God. God is real in my life because I've lived long enough to witness his blessings in my life. God expects us to live here on earth and use our resources to get the things we need or desire. I can't blame God when I was unemployed, or when I lost family members, or when I was going through tough times. Most of these things that happened were just a apart of life, but it was God who helped me through these tough times. I can't speak for anyone, but I've been through a lot and I won't discuss everything, but I used to say why me! I questioned a lot of things, but I also have been humbled through those experiences to learn what matter the most in my life.

I hope this helps you, but it is by faith and not by sight. My faith has helped me to know that God is real. I won't leave God because I know what he's brought me out and I'm at a place where I'm understanding more.

God Bless you and may you find the answers you are looking for.

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P.M.

answers from Tampa on

I haven't believed in the Christian God since I was 12 y/o

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M.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Yes. I won't say I totally don't now but have a ton of doubts that didn't exist before. Not sure how or when it happened either. I sometimes wonder if it was after having kids. I became so much more aware of the world around me and the pain that would come with losing a child...and wondering how a "good" God could let that happen to people. In addition to the many other crazy things we read about on a daily basis. So now I am really at a place where I do have to wonder is it all a hoax? When you think about it it makes perfect sense why man would invent something that would define his afterlife-the thought of dying and ending up in the ground is terrifying.
I hate feeling like this I have to say. I am jealous of people who really have faith in God. It seems like it would really be a comfort. I also really worry abotu burning in hell for feeling like this.
One more thing that is kind of weird...I have also wondered if this feeling has been put there by the devil..is this how he pulls people away? I mean-it is just too weird that I would all of a sudden stop believing.

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L.K.

answers from Kansas City on

Yes, and still do. What I don't believe in is organized religion.

How I explain it is I was born to a non-practicing Catholic father and non-denominational mother. I spent many years as a child in the Presbyterian church, but was baptized Baptist. I have relatives who are Old Order Brethren. Worked for the Seventh Day Adventists and went to school at the Nazarene University. I have dear friends who are Jewish, Hindu and Muslim. And married a Catholic. I respect all and believe that we are all heading the same direction but taking different paths. Nor is it my place to judge here on earth.

@ MamaDuck - How true is that Bill Mahr quote! It struck me on day that I kid you not, there are 4 different churches on 4 different corners not far from my house? Why? Because everyone believes in their interpretation of what Holy Word they are reading. I remember being somewhere with young kids, I was an adult at the time, and they where having a hard time finding a job because they couldn't work the Sabbath. And believed it is Holy and all that work on the Holy day should be put to death. I calmly said that I'll explain that next time they have a relative in the hospital I'm working at as a nurse. The whole world does not and can not shut down.
Someone else posted about dressing appropriately for church. Even my mom, bless her heart commented one time about a young man who came to church in jeans and she was appalled. Until I pointed out that he was there hearing the same sermon she was and maybe that's all he had. And what's that saying about judging?

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J.B.

answers from Rochester on

Yes. I was raised Catholic and even had a Catholic wedding. About about 7 years turned to Paganism and Love it. That is what I have always been. Do you feel "guilty" for not beliving in God?

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