Advice on Piercing Ears?

Updated on November 28, 2008
G.B. asks from Portage, WI
39 answers

My mother in law recently bought my daughter beautiful pearl earings and a necklace. My husband expressed interest in getting her ears pierced. We spoke with a nurse at our pediatrician's office, who thought that getting her ears done at this age would be fine. Any thoughts?

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C.K.

answers from Sheboygan on

I waited to get my daughters ears done until she was 4, it was her b-day present, and she wanted it done. My sister had her daughters done at 6 months and had a lot of problems with the earrings falling out (getting lost in the crib, fear of her swallowing or choking on them), she also had an instance where the earring was stuck in the hole. This doesn't always happen but its good to know. My daughter has not had a problem with the exception that she lost an earring at a friends house about 7 months after.

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A.F.

answers from Cedar Rapids on

I agree with the majority. She might not want her ears pierced when she is older. The piercing will leave a scar. She might even be allergic like I was and have her ear swell up and get really infected. I think ear piercing is a personal decision, and she should be allowed to have a say in it.

A.

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A.B.

answers from Fargo on

My personal take on getting ears pierced is to wait until they tell me they want them. I got mine when I was in 4th grade and then I was able to take care of them myself.

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J.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Here is a tip if you decide to pierce her ears: put baby orajel on her earlobe about 15 minutes before they pierce her ear. It will numb it a little bit. I have two girls and both had their ears pierced at 2 months old. We didn't know about this tip with our first daughter, and she cried a bit when her ears were done. We did use the orajel on our second daughter and she slept right through the procedure.

This is a topic that I have found many people really like to share their negative opinions about. Don't let them upset you.

1 mom found this helpful
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E.I.

answers from Duluth on

i would avoid getting her ears pierced. it may be a decision she later regrets. i ended up being allergic/sensitive to every single pair of earrings i bought. so tell her she can wait until shes older (16 18 something..?) and tell her that they can be pesty and a bother if she ends up being allergic.
only my opinion.
:D
good luck

A.L.

answers from Wausau on

I can't express how happy I am to see so many people urging you not to pierce your baby. This is my absolute BIGGEST pet peeve as I can't stand it when any parent puts any child through any unnecessary pain. And a piercing is certainly unnecessary. It is not like an immunization, it is merely torture in vanity's name for the parent, not the child.

Regardless of whether the child is "too young to remember it when they're older," ears are a part of the body that children, in my experience, often touch. They might pull on it when they're sleepy and most usually do when they have an ear infection as well.

I don't like it when people use the argument that "its a part of our culture." It doesn't matter if that was the case, it is still unnecessary cruelty to a child. And besides, in certain parts of the eastern world it is a common cultural practice to perform Female Circumcision to girls going through puberty. Does that mean its OK? "This is the way we've always done things, so this is the way I will do them as well." I think that's a pretty ignorant view, progress would never happen if we always thought that way. In my opinion, people who use that excuse are trying to find a way to justify what they are doing and shift the blame of their child's pain to someone or something else so they don't have to feel personally responsible when their baby cries.

In the end, if you get bullied into the decision by your husband or if you come to the decision on your own to pierce your baby girl's ears, I urge you to at least have it done by an actual physician or a professional piercing artist. With a doctor, you can be sure that the environment is safe and he or she is able to pierce your child surgically and possibly without pain by using anesthesia. Piercing guns are terrible since they push the tissue aside, professional piercing artists use hollow needles that remove a section of tissue for the earring to go into. This means that the wound is clean and is less likely to become infected.

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C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

If I had a girl, I would wait until she was old enough to make the choice herself and take care of them.
I've had my ears pierced twice, the first set when I was 12 or 13 and the second set at 16 or 17. The second time, one of the new holes became horribly infected and swollen and closed up over the the front of the earring- all overnight. I had done everything I was supposed to with cleaning an turning them. I had to push the earring front back through the skin and keep it from going back. It was incredibly painful and time-consuming and took a long time to get back to normal.
12+ years later, that ear is still more sensitive and prone to infection if I am not incredibly diligent at caring for the holes. I would not want to take the chance of anything like that happening to my baby.

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L.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

I did my first daughters ears at 8 months. (that was when my husband finally caved to my begging) She was a bit too old because she screamed every time she saw the jewelry counter after that. But she did do fine with the earrings themselves. Just make sure they pierce both sides at the same time. If they don't have two people to get both done, wait or go somewhere else.
I want to pierce their ears by 3 months so they leave them alone, but my husband and my ped disagree.
If you are still nursing her, it will go great! She will stop crying when you start nursing her. Otherwise try giving her a Safety Pop sucker, the sugary treat should distract her.

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B.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

I pierced my daughter's ears at 4mos. old and Never had a any problems..

I now just had another daughter (6wks.old) and were waiting for her first immunizations then were going to get her's pierced as well.

If you do it while their young they don't know they're in and don't touch them or pull them out etc...

Alot people say to wait until the child wants it and can take care of it well I've never met a girl who didn't want her ears pierced.

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J.Y.

answers from Madison on

Would you go ahead and pierce your daughters eyebrow or nose? Most parents would say no way. (Me included) I don't see a difference between making the decision to pierce your daughters ears and piercing some other part of her body. It is intrusive and disrespectful to do that to a little one who has not given consent to be pierced with a needle. I would love to be able to buy earrings for my daughter but she doesn't want them pierced yet. She said maybe when she is 8, and I think it will be an empowering thing for her to be able to make that decision about her own body and be old enough to remember choosing it for herself.

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B.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

Ask him if he is expressing an interest in caring for the earrings in her ears every day???
It is a LOT of work for anyone, and a baby obviously can't do it herself....so, therefore it will be up to an adult.
Keep the earrings and necklace and give them to her for her first communion, or confirmation or something special.
Then, she can care for them by herself. Having a baby is enough work.

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J.F.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi G.,

I asked this question when my daughter was 5 months old and got about 125 responses! After reading all of them (some not so nice ones), I realized that it is your preference as a parent and that you have a small window of opportunity to have them done when they are an infant (before they are really mobile). Then, it would be best to wait until she is past 3 years old when she isn't as accident prone and there isn't any choking concerns. We chose to wait until she is older and will play it by ear (no pun intended!). I was also concerned that the holes wouldn't line up later after she was grown. Good luck! (I didn't read your other posts, and hope they weren't as mean as some of the ones I got!)

K.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

I agree with the previous 2 moms, wait till your daughter is old enough to say she wants it and will be able to take care of it herself... I am sure you are going to hear other moms saying they think it is the cutest thing and gald they had their daughter's ears pireced as an infant, so take everything as opnions and make your decision from there.

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J.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

If you had said you had an 8-YEAR-old girl I probably wouldn't offer this feedback, but personally, I would wait until your daughter is older, so it can be sort of a big-girl thing to do. Do babies really need jewelry? Maybe I'm biased just because I had to be 12 before my parents would allow it! Keep in mind the maintenance of keeping the ears clean--another thing to think about! I say let babies stay babies for a while.

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L.D.

answers from Milwaukee on

As long as your daughter doesn't normally play with her ears, she should handle the earrings just fine!! I had always been told to wait until the baby is at least a year old, but when my 2 1/2 yr old was born, I found out that mommies are getting their babies ears pierced as soon as 6 weeks or something crazy like that!!!

Anyways, take your baby girl somewhere where there are at least 2 piercers, because that way, there will be someone on each side with the piercing gun, and can do both ears at the same time.

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E.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

I had my first daughter's ears done at 13 months. She was too old to be oblivious and too young to be excited and sit still. Neesles to say it wasn't the best experience. I voed that if I had more girls I would get them done earlier. When I had my second daughter, her ears got pierced at 6 months. Smooth sailing!! Also when they are that young the nerves intheir ears have not fully grown down into the lobe so it hurts them less.
Also, my best friends just did her daughter's ears and she is 3 months old. The only thing at the piercing place is that they want them to have their first set of shots before they do them.

Good luck and HAVE FUN!!! She will look so precious with them!

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A.D.

answers from Madison on

I see you have received a lot of advice and I honestly haven't read them all, so I'll just tell you what I did with my daughter and why : )
My cousin had his daughter's ears pierces as an infant and when they came to visit me I had to clean the earrings, and ears because of infection. I found that it was there 2nd or third try to fight this infection and I told them that the holes should just close and to try again in a few years to keep them clean easier she was 2 at that time and at four she can help with the cleaning. That seems to have been good advice since she had the holes redone without a further issue.
My daughter had been asking since she was 2. She got them done when she was nearly 5. We have cleaned her ears religiously and not had a problem. I would have done it at 4 but her dad had an issue with that. We made sure that there were two people available to each have a gun and we'd have it done in one shot in case it hurt too much for her to have a second shot right after the first.
Honestly I think as long as you keep up with the cleaning and turning the earrings it will be just fine.

R.B.

answers from La Crosse on

i know there is alot of mom's who are against it. but i just got my baby girl ears done a couple of weeks ago after her tetnus shots (2 mo). we left the dr's office and went and had it done right away. she cried harder for the shots than getting her ears done. i had it done one at a time due to its easier to hold her head that way. we gave her tylenol after the shots and before getting them pierced and she bearly cried. she hasn't had a problem with me cleaning them or turning them.

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M.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

Yea, I'm sure it'll be fine. I wanted to wait until my children were 6-8 years old but it didn't work out that way. I wanted to give them the right to decide instead of me taking that right away. I waited until my oldest was 3 years and 8 months old and was asking me for it on and off the year previously. My step-mother purchased birthstone earrings at her first birthday but couldn't wear them until about 8 weeks after her earrings were pierced. They just sat in a cabinet.

My youngest is two and I'll wait until she's asking me for awhile. Even thought my oldest was asking me I know she's still too young to make such a permanent decision but I allowed it because it's our tradition in America and you problably see more girls with it than not.

It's a personal decision and I'd just personally wait untils he asks and asks for awhile. Then you know she'll appreciate it. My oldest is a few months over four and she still tells me how happy she is that she got them and that she likes them.

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J.A.

answers from Madison on

My thoughts on this is that earrings are a choking hazard. We had a friend at our house whose daughters both have pierced ears. The younger one managed to lose an earring, which luckily I found before my girls (who were 1 at the time).

I also agree with waiting until your daughter can make the choice herself. Both of my girls would like pierced ears, but they will be waiting until at least age 11, when they should be able to take care of the piercings themselves.

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K.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

I agree with Cassandra. I waited until my daughter was able to take care of her ears on her own and would not play with them. My doctor even made a comment the other day with she was in for her physical. She asked when she got her ears pierced and I told her when she was 7yrs old - she is now 11yrs old. She said she hates when she see's infant come in with their ears pierced. I agree - I think when they are pierced that young it is for the parents enjoyment, not the childs. I had to wait until I was 13yrs old to get mine done. My 1yr old will have to wait many years to get hers done...

However, all in all it is your personal opionion that matters!!

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G.N.

answers from Lincoln on

My daughter got her ears pierced at 2 weeks old. It shocked a bunch of people, I know. But where I was born baby girls get it done when they are babies, right away so they don't try to grab their ears. It's a cultural thing... as for the pain, she cried for a whole 10 seconds! I am not kidding! And our pediatrician did it, we didn't go to the mall or any other unsanitary place.
A couple of my friends (same background as me) were surprised because they couldn't do it any earlier than 3 months, per their pediatrician.
At 8 months old I'm not sure... you know her best, will she attempt to tug at her ears? If you think she would, then maybe you should wait until she herself asks for it? Other than that, medically she should be fine (otherwise the nurse would have expressed concerns).

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A.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

I had my daughter's ears pierced at 4 months and never had any issues. I had them do each ear at the same time though (two people) so it was only one prick. She never messed with them until recently (almost 3 years old now) and now she only messes with them because she figured out how to take them out and likes to try and get new ones!

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A.R.

answers from Milwaukee on

I had my ears pierced at 1 month old... i cried for all of 2 seconds (so says my mom) and I've had them pierced ever since and am glad that I got it done while my ears were still very thin.
I have now had my daughters ears pierced since she was three months old. She cried for 10 minutes and she was over it. I didn't find it difficult or a hardship at all to clean her ears a couple of times a day and rotate the earring. She's got very cute little studs in (that i don't change often at all) and eveyone thinks they are very cute.
Also something to keep in mind is that it might be better to do them now before she really starts finding her ears and pulling on them.
Just my opinion and experiance.
I am a 28 yr old working mom with a beautiful 23 month old.

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J.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

I got my daughter's ears pierced after her last tetanus shot, I believe, she was about 6 months old. She totally does not think about them and allows me to change her earrings when necessary w/ no fuss. She's 2 now and I can't imagine getting the piercing done now...it would be too much drama.

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M.W.

answers from St. Cloud on

This is a great age to do it.

Claries' where we had it done says BEFORE 1 or AFTER 5.

Just call ahead and MAKE SURE THERE WILL BE 2 WORKERS SO THEY DO THEM BOTH AT ONCE!!!

As for waiting, if you want it done, just do it. What grown woman ever said, I wish my parents would have waited. On the other hand, I know some that are now to scared to go get it done themselves and wish their parents would have just done it.

Our daughter was 9 1/2 months when we did hers. She did not say a peep. I don't think I would do them a whole lot younger but at that age they looked really cute. She never touched them and we had NO PROBLEMS. I rarely change them. She's now 3 1/2 and I think we've changed them 3 times (for special occasions) total. Her studs are cute. I personally don't like seeing itty bitty babies with piercings though....

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H.A.

answers from Waterloo on

This is just my opinion, but I think girls should be able to make the decision when they want to get their ears pierced (if at all). I look at it as more of a "coming of age" thing for a teen or pre-teen girl.

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C.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

I would not pierce my child's ears until: (1) They were old enough to know what is going on, and give consent, and (2) They were old enough to care for their pierced ears and earrings, which means using the cleaning solution and not losing or playing with earrings. I think most kids hit both points at around age 7.

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A.V.

answers from Minneapolis on

Our ped told ut to get it done between 4 & 8 months or 3 & 4 years her reason was younger they won't know they are there after the 1st hour or so lowering her risk of infection and 3-4 years knows not to touch them inbetween is very difficult and can easily get infected long story short my baby 4months at the time (now 16 almost 17 month old) my BF 24 and her youngest 3 years all went and got their ears pierced (had mine before i can remember) my 4 month olds never got red or infected 24 year old got them infected from changing them too soon and 3 year old got them infected from showing them and touching them they all got cleaned 2-3 times a day. With the baby they suggest not to change them for 6 months just clean daily and rotated them i did that and now change them every couple days depending on the outfit (HAHAHAHA) and clean them besides in the bath once a week but clean them when i take them out. If you are still unsure call your ped and they can direct you in the right direction but i suggest you do it ASAP the older the baby the higher risk of infection.

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M.A.

answers from Rapid City on

I used to work at a place that pierced ears. I've peirced hundreds of ears on people from age 1 month to age 90. There are few things you need to consider. You ped is right, there is nothing health wise to prevent you from doing it. Once they've had thier first shots, you can go for it. But before you do, there are a few things you need to know that most people who pierce won't tell you about. As one mom suggested, it is easier on the little on if you have them both done at the same time. Be very careful of this though. If both people aren't holding the guns just right, they will both be set in different directions. That means when she's older and tries to wear studs, they will point in diffent directions. I have my ears peirced 4 times and one set was done badly. One side the stud points up and the other points down. Because of that, I only wear hoops. It sucks.

Like another mom pointed out, you have to take care of them. If you wait, it can be a great learning experience for your DD on taking care of things. Plus if by chance she does develope an infection, it will not only be painful, but you'll have to let them close. This will create scar tissue that will make re-piercing difficult and more painful.

The last thing to consider is that at her age, your DD's ears are growing very rapidly. Even if they are straight and even now, they might not be in a year or 5 years. Personally, after peircing as much as I have, I would never peirce my daughter's ears as a baby. I would recommend waiting, but it, of course, is a personal decision you have to make. If you do decide to get them done, feel free to email me (____@____.com) and I'll give you any ideas and advice I can to make it go smoothly.

Whatever you decide, best of luck!!

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B.N.

answers from Madison on

Personally I've had 2 piercing in 1 ear and 4 in the other, and a belly ring. So obviously I'm not against piercings. However i will never pierce my DD until the point where she comes up to me and tells me she want's piercings. She needs to make that decision because it's her body not mine. Just a thought.

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi,

My little girl will be 5 at Christmas (26th) and I have held tight to not letting her get her ears pierced until she is 5. My reason is, at this age she will have some say in what happens to her ears. Also, she will be more responsible to help care for the new piercings. At 5 some girls do not want their ears pierced. I would hold off till she is a little older to get them pierced. The pearl earings would be very special if she was old enough to go to the bank and take them out of a saftey deposit box and know she was given them at such a young age. could even take a picture of her now with the earings and put it with them for when you decide she is ready.

If your hubby really wants them, will he be the one to keep turning them as your baby girl is screaming and trying to pull them out? What if she gets an infection? Where will he be? Those are the questions I gave my husband when he wanted our baby girl's pierced. He thought it was a good idea to wait a while. Then, wait till the winter hat season is over. I don't want the hat to ripe the earings out either.

Good luck with your decisions. Remember you are the mommy and no one can tell you how to raise your baby.

K.

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S.G.

answers from Rapid City on

I had my daughters ears pierced when she was a year old and it only took one fall on a chair at the bowling alley to rip her ear. We let them close up and when she was in kindergarten she asked for them to be pierced again, so we did and during rest time they laid on carpet mats. Her earring got caught on the mat and when she lifted her head it forced the back to go inside her ear (probably wasn't completely closed when she tore it at 1 year). By the time I seen it, her ear had swollen up around the back, it took a doctors visit and a lot of pain to get the back out. Again we let them close and we left it that way until she was old enough to take care of them and to be less likely to rip her ears.

I know it is cute seeing those little earrings and all but why chance problems when she isn't even old enough to ask for them?

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A.D.

answers from Davenport on

Sorry, I try not to be too judgemental about what other people do, but one thing I can't stand is when a parent pierces their baby's ears. I think it looks trashy and ridiculous, not cute. You know that baby didn't decide to do that for herself. The parents pushed that decision on her based on their own beliefs. Let her make that decision when she's old enough for the responsibility. As for the pearl earrings, if they are that important to your family, do you want to risk losing them by putting them in a baby's ear?

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L.M.

answers from Rapid City on

Since your daughter will not be able to wear the necklace right now either, maybe you should wait until she is old enough to appreciate this gift and get her ears pierced and present the earrings and necklace at the same time. If you put them aside and wait until she is old enough to understand where they came from, it might be more meaningful, and there will be less of a chance of the jewelry getting lost.

I personally do not like the appearance of earrings on a baby. I think their new little bodies should be kept whole as long as possible! :)

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A.M.

answers from Appleton on

We had our daughter's ears pierced at 5 months old. She has NEVER touched them. She let me clean them every time I changed her diaper for the first 10wks, and now lets me clean during baths--it is like they have been a part of her life forever. She looks SOO cute with them and no one ever thought she was a boy!

She is now 17 months old, and we have yet to change them because I just don't see the need to just yet. We have not had any problems with them, and she still doesn't really notice that they are in.

I say DO IT! My sister-in-law had her daughter's done when she was 3yrs old and said it was a nightmare, she knew what was going on and has played with them non-stop to the point they hurt her. My theory is that the younger the better--they don't really know what is going on.

Good Luck!

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S.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

Her inquisitive little fingers may tug at the earrings. The piercing will hurt her and she won't understand why. She may feel, as I do, that it is uncomfortable to sleep with an earring in her ear. How will she tell you that the back is pushing into her head when she sleeps on her side? How will you stop her from pulling at it when it itches?

Is this really what you want, or are you feeling pressure to do this? Perhaps more importantly, is this what your daughter will want when she is old enough to have an opinion? Why not wait and ask her when she can be excited about it? It sort of robs her of that experience if you do it now. I have given my children things because I really wanted them to have them, only to later have wished I would have held off until they were a little older and they could appreciate it more.

If you do the ears now, maybe for her coming of age she will want to do her navel, or her eyebrow, or her nose? (Not to be judgmental about that, but I say let her start with her own ears.

They have cute little stick on earrings you could use...

This is a controversial one, and I just thought I'd put in my 2 cents. Good luck with whatever you decide! (:

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S.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Most girls that I know want their ears pierced at some point in their life. My daughter got her ears done at 3 months. I am glad I did it because as they get older they they tend to pull more at them. At a younger age they leave them alone more. It is however your own choice nobody elses. You go with what you think is right for you and your little girl.

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A.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

I'm not a fan of piercing infants' ears but I can give you some insight from the perspective of the piercer. I used to work at Claire's and I pierced several babies' ears. It was never a pleasant experience - the babies always cried and so did the moms. I also felt that it was a bit of a guessing game with regards to where to put the hole. The earlobe is so small, it was always hard to find a good spot - and there was always a fear that once the lobe grew, it may no longer be the best spot. I've seen people over the years that have the hole in a weird spot and I always wonder if they were pierced when an infant. Whatever you do, make sure someone has LOTS of experience.

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