Advice on Better Managing My Current Au Pair

What about getting OUT of the house one day with her, think of it as a "business lunch". Get away from the distractions and interruptions.

Ask her how things are going. Give her the chance to talk about if the job is what she expected and what she can handle. Then you can address any concerns she has and transition into some things you've noticed/seen slipping, without seeming critical.

Does she have any "time off" with NO responsibilities? Like one day just for herself with no laundry or tidying up? I think she IS entitled to that. We all need to destress/decompress...I think it makes us better and more focused when we come back.

If she is "off duty" with the kids, but still has household responsibilities (read NOT on her day off), then address those issues. "I need you to throw in a load of laundry WHILE you're online." Or "Take a break to ensure the kids' clothes are laid out for the next day and rooms are picked up before they go to bed."

I think that if you take a woman to woman "business" approach to this issue, you may find a more cooperative employee who sees open lines of communication rather than feeling like an indentured servant.

Just my input - I hope you find it helpful! Let us know what happens!

Sara

We have an au pair also and it is my understanding that they are not to be asked to do any housework other than straightening up after the kids when they are watching them and cooking for the kids when they are watching them. I was specifically told that they were not to do housekeeping duties including laundry. She may be upset about having to do it. I would clarify this with your agency but that was my understanding.

I am not sure how many hours she is working but maybe making it clear that when she is on duty she is reponsible for certain things. Remember that the time you have her doing any work for you counts as "on duty" time even if you are home and she is limited to 45 hours a week, 10 hours a day and must have at least 1 weekend off a month. They must have at least a consecutive full day and a half off each week. As for "forgetting" when she is supposed to work, I don't really have any suggestions- maybe there is another issue bothering her and she will tell you if you bring it up.

I don't know which agency you used, but ours has local childcare coordinators that are very helpful if you have an issue you need to know how to handle or help resolving. Hopefully you get this cleared up and have a great time with this au pair. We had a wonderful two years with our first au pair and are about to get our second.

Hi,
I would say forgetting the medicine needs to be addressed. That is huge and maybe she needs to set a timer or do something to remember the medicine. Note in the bathroom or someplace she will see it.

You need to have another meeting with her. Explain to her again that this is a responsibility. If she doesn't improve immediatley you will have to go into rematch. You really can't do anytjhing about what she does when she is not on duty-If it is your computer, you don't have to let her use it. Remember- You're in charge!!

K., I don't have your contract with her but I do know if you have an au pair then there should be a contract. You should have clearly lined out jobs and clearly defined time frames. However from my own perspective if its her time off then its not your business if she spends all day on facebook. Is laundry clearly lined in your contract. I don't know if thats a regular job for au pair. I know its not for a nanny or babysitter. maybe au pair is different? I think you just need good communication. so go thru the contract and like the last poster said have a lunch away from the house and kids and go thru things one at a time. good luck.

Hi K.,

Have you sat down and had a talk about your expectations of your au pair? Also, which agency are you with? I am just wondering what kind of support you are getting from your local counselor.

-B.