What to Get for Mom That Lost Newborn

if the baby JUST passed, try to get in touch with "now i lay me down to sleep" TONIGHT. they will get a local photographer into the hospital ASAP and do some BEAUTIFUL pics of the baby. i am so sorry for you friend.

http://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/

here's a direct link to the coordinators in our area:
http://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/searchpage.php

another idea, a james avery bracelet with the "heart remembers" charm.

After my ectopic, my sister got me a precious moments figurine of a baby sleeping on a cloud. It meant so much to me. I put it in our new baby's nursery as a momento.

Check out:
http://www.labelledame.com/miscarriage-infant-loss.html

There are some great gifts and keepsake jewelry on there with some touching poems. May give you some ideas. So sorry to hear of her loss.

I'm so so sorry for this mom's loss. I can't even begin to imagine her heartache. *tears*

We had a m/c last December a few days before Christmas. The baby would have been due in July...the same month as my birthday. My husband found a frame at Hallmark that reads:

"It is not how long a star shines, but the brightness of its light that matters." And it had a small silver star on the frame amidst the verbage and a place to the right for a photo. My husband put the last u/s pic we had of our baby with a heartbeat in the frame and gave it to me on my birthday among my other gifts. I had been struggling emotionally for the few weejs prior to that and my sweet husband found the most perfect thing to help my hurting heart. It is by far one of the most treasured things I possess.

I know you may not have access to a photo of her little one, but perhaps the frame would still be appropriate. We also gave this frame (with a photo) of a friend whose 19 yr old daughter was killed in a car accident. She has expressed to us how much it meant to her because her daughter's light was quite bright!

My thoughts and prayers are with this dear mom and her family. {{{Hugs}}}

my heart breaks for moms whom have lost a child...i think that for a lot of these moms it's important for them to remember their child, & not to let that child's memory, however short, be lost. so maybe some kind of keepsake with the year or birthday on it.

What heartache. My sister lost her triplets two and a half years ago. She has been on a journey through grief ever since, with good and bad days. She compiled a list of books/websites and other things that have helped her along the way. The biggest help for her has been connecting to others that have had similar loss. There are lots of forums and support groups online:
www.inciid.com www.amysangels.com

Books:
An Empty Cradle a Full Heart by Christine O'Keeffe Lafser
I'll Hold you in Heaven by Jack Hayford
Mommy Please Don't Cry, There are no tears in Heaven by Linda Deymaz

Most of all, when she gets home from the hospital and you feel that your life is "back to normal" pick up the phone and call her. She is still sad. It may take a long time and even then she will have a "new normal." Let her know you are there and that you remember her baby and always will.

Maybe an inspirational / encouraging poem or card.

When we buried our triplets 3 yrs ago my friend gave me a simple charm bracelet with three little charms with their names engraved on them. Someone had done the same for her when she buried her son. She told me she wore it for a few months, because it made her feel closer to her son. I in turn did the same. Just having their names there to look at was comforting to me. Last year my dear friend lost her baby boy, and I did the same for her. She told me the same thing, that it was a comfort to her.

I agree that sometimes flowers are sad, as they die too.

I got the gift at Things Remembered in the mall, and it was not expensive. I could not put a price on what it meant to me for my friend to do that though.

We will be praying for her, and for the other baby. Thanks for being a caring friend, she will need you in the weeks and months to come.

What about a braclet with two birthstones on it. One for each child.

Is the mom a Christian? If so, contact various churches, bible study groups, Sunday School classes, religious schools, etc, and just put together a "Prayer Tree" listing the different individuals or groups and mabe a short quote from them but also acknowledge that they are praying for her, her sickly child and also the deceased child. Maybe even include some humor to brighten her day.

what about a tree like an oak that they can plant in their yard as a memorial tree with a small sign/plaque

maybe something in memory of the baby......that just breaks my heart!

A great up lifting book and favorite treats in a basket. or coupons for cleaning, a shoulder, endless hugs, etc. real plants. I know that saying "I'm sorry for your loss" gets really old and annoying, but just spending time in prayer or in silence does wonders. My heart goes out to her, Family, and Friends. May God be with you all.

Hi, I also have lost a baby, it was stillborn. A friend who had been through the same thing gave me a Willow Tree Angel. This Angel is holding a baby. It is a very simple thing but I keep it out and it reminds me that my baby is in heaven being held by angels until I get there, it is very comforting. I am so sorry for your friend prayers are the best thing anyone can do. You can get the Willow Tree Angels at a Hallmark store.

stores like Hallmark have those natural wood statues. A mother and child statue or an angel statue of a child would give her some peace as to where her little angel is now and yes even though it would remind her everytime she sees it some memory is good. Alot of mothers feel guilt when they start to remember less and this will help.

Check out thesse ideas. Even if you don't order from these websites, maybe you'll get an idea. I'm so sorry for your friend's loss. :(

http://www.rememberingthem.net/index.html

http://dying.lovetoknow.com/Bereavement_Gifts

http://www.legacy925.com/Jewelry___Gift_Collections/Memor...

Food is always an appropriate gift for any occasion. You don't have to cook yourself. You could pick-up just about anything and bring it over there. One less thing for them to think about. so sad.
E.

I don't have much more to add because all these mom's gave great ideas. I lost one of my twins when they were 11 weeks old. She died of SIDS, basically she was healthy and they have no idea why she died. It's been 8 1/2 years for me and I can feel how I felt back then. I am so sorry that this mom has to go through that. I know that I appreciated people cooking meals and cleaning my home. I also appreciated people being there to care for my son because I was an emotional wreck. If she has older children, that could help. I like the idea of the tree. My husband and I are planning to do that for Carlie. Make sure she gets hand and footprints and a lock of hair. I should know this, but maybe there is a special baby book for a child that has passed. Also the jewlery is a wonderful idea. As far as flowers, I didn't really care for them. The spread that was on top her casket, I took some flowers from that and kept them in a plastic baggy. And if there was a blanket or littl shirt that he was wrapped in, makes sure she gets that and puts it in a plastic baggy to preserve his smell. My only wish is that she never had to feel this pain. Oh, and try not to say that God needed another angel. I hated that. It made me angry because there is no better place for a child then in their mother's arms. Just my opinion.

Oh man that is so sad.there is really nothing you can buy her that will make her feel any better.Just be there for her give her a shoulder to cry on bring her family food to eat clean her house do anything that needs to be done that will help her more than anything.Pray for her.

I am so sorry to hear of your friend's loss. My DH and I lost one of our twins (stillborn) on July 22, 2008 between 29 & 32 weeks gestation, so my pain is still very fresh. Meanwhile, his twin sister is thriving, but not a day goes by that I don't think about our son.

To be honest, the "gifts" I appreciated most from people during this time were their hugs, their shoulders to cry on, their ears when I needed someone to talk to, their phone calls and emails of "how are you", and their offers of "if there is anything I can do for you, please just ask." I wanted to grieve privately and not look at mementos or remembrances of my lost son (not yet anyway).

Just my two-cents.

I am so sorry for your friends loss. I too had twins. They were born at only 24 weeks. I lost one of my sweet boys six days later. I was so touched by so many people as they reached out to me and my husband. We received a beautiful wood box that had a place for documents so they would not get bent. We placed his sonogram pictures and birth certificate in there along with other paper momentos. It also has larger compartments for some of the things that were bought for him and things that were given to us for him. It has his name engraved on the top with his birthdate. I think it came from the Bombay store. We keep it out in the living room where we can see it when we walk by. She and her other baby will be in my prayers.

one of my really good friends/coworkers lost her newborn on saturday. i have been at a loss for what to do or what to say but everyone's suggestions have been so helpful. it is just exceptionally hard for me because i gave birth to my son in september and oddly i feel guilty because he is healthy and alive. i know that sounds silly but it's the truth.

it just breaks my heart.

amelia
10/28/08-11/2/08

I was in our local Hallmark store a few days ago and noticed a new line of cards for the loss of a young child, cancer patients, etc. You might do something like that with an angel figurine or something...something she can keep.

I second what other moms have said about the Willow Tree Angel, a James Avery Charm, a plant, and/or meals. Also, there is a sweet book out there called Big George which I recommend.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1561706175/ref=cm_cr_pr_...

I lost a baby when I was 6 months pregnant and someone gave us a basket of potted mums. We've moved it 2 times in the past 7 years, but each fall we get to look at "Edward's flowers" and it makes me smile.

Hope this helps. My prayers are with your friend.

When my mom lost twins on her 40th birthday, someone gave her a little crystal/glass figurine of 2 birds. She has it up on her shelf where she can see it regularly. It's just a thought.

You might help her set up a memorial for her lost little angel. I will be praying for the second child. I have only one and couldn't imagine going through losing him.
My heart goes out to her.
Hope this suggestion helps.

Hi K., I'm so sorry for your friend I will pray for her & her family.
I would think something from sonewhere like Bath & Body works would be nice. I also know that just being there as her friend is often just what someone needs. Maybe you could cook dinner for them or maybe help with her house work. The simplest things are the hardest to do for yourself at times like these. Just shower her with your love & be a blessing to her.
Sounds like you're a wonderful friend.
God bless you all.