Stressed Out! - Little Rock,AR

Updated on October 29, 2009
C.S. asks from Little Rock, AR
21 answers

Hi Mom's,

It seems the older I get, the more stressed out I have become. I'm in my early 40's and feel like I'm falling apart. I'm so overwhelmed at times that I feel like I'm going to explode, and then I burst into tears. My family looks at me as though I've lost it. Where did I go? Is this a sign of menopause? I have a regular cycle, but more and more I've noticed the mean person I become when it hits. I never had trouble with my emotions/temper during my cycle when I was younger. This last time I felt so wound the first day that I was "tingling" all day. One day I am happy with my family and all the blessings that we have, and then the next day I am run down and resentful with nothing else to give. It's really starting to bother me. Am I depressed? Is it hormonal? I've always been known as a happy, laid back person. This just isn't me. Are there any words of wisdom that any of you can share? I made an appointment with my OBGYN to discuss this with them as well.

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So What Happened?

OK here is what has happened since I posted back in October. I went in to see my regular doctor and through tears, I discussed with her everything I could think of. She too thought that I might be going through pre-menopause, but my tests came back negative. I went to see my OBGYN and again was told that I'm healthy and nothing wrong with hormonal levels. On an interesting side note.... I began taking over the counter Estroven which really did seem to help. I also moved my office in early December across the hall from a room without a window, to an office with a window. Almost immediately I felt better. I haven't taken the Estroven since the first week in December. I'm feeling better and handling stress better. Our family took a quick trip to visit relatives in Texas over the holiday. While we were there, my cousin, who is my same age, wanted to know my secret! She said "I'm so stressed out right now, but you seem so calm." I spoke with my doctor about possibly having a sun deficiency. He basically told me to monitor my emotions now that I have a window to sit by all day and let him know if I continue to improve.

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A.H.

answers from Fayetteville on

I went through something similar in my 40"s and it called pre menapausal I had no idea that even ten years before the time of menapause you could have these symptons. Good luck to you and at least you realize there is a problem.

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S.G.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I am right with you, sister. :) Only I've only had one real period in like 5 months...although I feel like I have PMS X 100 every month. I get irrationally angry and sort of ... insane! hehe For me it is peri-menopause, moving quickly into full-blown menopause (the women in my family seem to get into it fairly early). I'm only 41 and I'm having hot flashes.
Hang in there!! I have opted not to go with hormone treatment at present, but I find that OTC Estroven helps with some of the moodiness. GOOD LUCK! xox

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B.B.

answers from Tulsa on

I went thru very similar feelings and my doc decided it was time for an attitude adjuster......zoloft. It took a little adjusting to with finding the right amount for me, but once we figured out how much I needed, it has calmed me down dramatically and helped me deal better with life's situations! That's my story......anyway, good luck!!!

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R.P.

answers from Little Rock on

If you have not felt like your self in more then 2 weeks, it might be a good idea to be checked for depression. I know sometimes life can be difficult. I have a son who is ADHD and sometimes I get really stressed out trying to figure out how to get him to mind. If you have not been your self in over a month, It might be a good idea to be checked for depression. I hope the best for you and be strong. Things do have way of turning out ok. :) Best of luck to you. and Think happy thought and try to laugh.

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K.M.

answers from Tulsa on

C.,

I'd be curious to know what your doctor says. I will be 42 in a few days and since I hit the 40s I have been getting worse and worse emotionally before each cycle. The cycles themselves are different too but I can handle that. It's the never knowing when I'm going to blow up or cry that bothers me. It feels like I did every time I was pregnant. I look forward to the "release" that the periods bring me.

K.

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T.D.

answers from Lafayette on

Oh my goodness!! You have just explained how I was living last year. I went through the same thing and did not know when it started or where it came from. I finally got so frustrated that I went to the doctor. He told me to get this book.."Hormones, Health, and Happiness" by Stephen Hortz. Wow, it really opened my eyes, especially knowing that I wasn't going crazy and I wasn't alone. After I read through the book, I made another appointment with him, and we discussed the book. He also ran a few tests and I ended up lacking Vit. D and iodine. He recommended some all natural supplements and after a few months, that seemed to help. I also joined a gym and feel so much better.

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A.W.

answers from Lawton on

You're not alone. I went through the same thing: roller coaster emotions, etc! Hang in there and talk to your obgyn. It does get better.

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V.

answers from Dothan on

The answer to "is it hormonal?" is Yes and No. As we age, the balance between testosterone and estrogen shifts. You are beginning to feel like a man feels ALL THE TIME. Prone to action, easily bored, under threat, easily ticked off. You are used to feeling very loving and pro-social and it is a shock when this other side emerges in us females for the first time. Testosterone is the hormone that makes us more agressive (but also more horny). So there is a good and bad side to what you are feeling.You will have to learn what a man must learn early in life....how to ride your emotions like a high strung horse. Know that you are feeling deeply, but it will calm down sooner or later. Learn how to keep a stern hold on your feelings and to trust more in logic than feeling. We females are just so naturally nice in our early years, it is a shock to us when we start to feel the tug of testosterone.

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A.W.

answers from Mobile on

Sounds like hormonal imbalance.
Transdermal Progesterone Cream is a dream.
Ask your OB!
Blessings,
AM

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J.P.

answers from Oklahoma City on

You did the right thing by making a Dr.'s appointment. It sounds like either a hormonal imbalance or mild depression. I've dealt both in my family and you describe the feelings accurately. Your doctor will be able to give you advise and possibly medicine to help ease the drastic mood swings. Also, look into taking herbs and vitamins to add a natural balance once you have the doctors diagnosis. Don't expect him/her to know which ones to take, though. You'll have to do a little research on your own to find out what is best.
J.

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L.W.

answers from Auburn on

Of course your hormone levels are changing, but in my experience they mainly heighten one's reactions: they don't create them entirely. So don't let anyone tell you it's all body chemistry, unless you truly believe that. I try to look at it as my hormones calling attention to things that are really bothering me so I can deal with them. If you have a lot of stress, even good stress, and can "handle it" except when the hormones kick in, maybe most of the time you're not really realizing the toll this is taking, and you really do need to make some changes that would take some of the burden off you or improve your mood--like delegating duties, getting more sleep, exercise, whatever. If you believe the hormones are making you respond inappropriately, by all means do what you can to minimize this; I'm just saying, don't shut out any helpful messages they may be sending about your life.

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D.S.

answers from Jonesboro on

I did the same thing at 42. It was terrible! Talk with your OB/GYN. He can prescribe you something that will help. I take Celexa for mine and it totally works!

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B.L.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Please do discuss this w/ your OBGYN. Your words sound alot like the symptoms of depression and/or anxiety. Your still functioning in life, so your symptoms aren't paralyzing. But they are definately affecting your quality of life. A low dosage anti-anxiety or anti-depressant (often the same meds are used to treat both) medication may really help.

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M.G.

answers from Chicago on

Wow! You hit the nail on the head. That's me, too, sometimes. My kids are 3, 2 and newborn, and I get to the point where I just want 5 seconds to breathe. :)
What has helped is staying really busy and getting out of the house. Also, it helps to focus on one or a few goals. That way, you are striving for something, excited to get there. Of course, when you reach a goal, make another. I find that I'm always striving for goals but never happy unless I have another one somewhere within reach. It means you get a lot done, too!

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L.W.

answers from Biloxi on

Listen to the other woman who mentioned thyroid. Get tested for it. It is a simple blood draw and results are same day or next day. If it is thyroid, you will need to learn as much about it as possible. There are a few thyroid groups on sparkpeople.com you can join and ask away. Also, Mary Shoman (not sure of the spelling on her last name), writes extensively on thyroid on About.com. Get tested asap. Good luck. and I hope we are wrong, but it sure sounds like it.

Some signs and symptoms:
-dry skin
-inability to sleep well- waking often and at odd times, but sleepy during the day
-more than normal hair loss when washing/brushing
-cold- all the time
-basal body temp less than 98.6 (must take the temp before moving or getting out of bed in the am)
-sluggish digestive system
-brittle nails
-loss of sex drive
-forgetfulness (like oldtimers)
-no energy (tired all thetime)
-easily distracted
-mood swings (crying one minute,mad the next. also find it hard to smile)
-thoughts of "I'm going crazy".

For more s/s check out the About.com website. Mary is a RN and has made thyroid her life's work.

If it turns out you do have low thyroid - I would STRONGLY suggest you get Thyroid Helper and Leptinal from Wellness Resources.com - they help a LOT.

Good luck and let us know how it turns out.
L.

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M.M.

answers from Tuscaloosa on

Have her check out your testosterone levels. I noticed that I go thru the same kind of ordeal everytime I use birth control with hormones since all the extra hormones in them are estrogen. When I have more estrogen levels (then my testotrone levels are reduced) I go thru serious instant anger, crying, and just feel like I'm on the worst emotional rollercoaster ride ever. And it's different from one hour to the next. Your hormone levels could be changing and testotrone plays a huge part in our bodies. As we get older, having kids, change of eating habits (or lack of good eating habits) and just our bodies changing in general all play a part on how our bodies produce our hormones. It's only my suggestion and I could totally be wrong, but I do know that your symptons sound like mine do and I've recently been going thru it cause of the depo shot. I am also a totally easy going and laid back person that is usually bubbly and happy and very outgoing. The change in my hormone levels make me want to be a hermit, curl up and just be alone, and quick to temper with my children, feel moody, depressed and just all around ticked off cause I'm tired of the mood swings. I feel for you and I've got my fingers crossed that you find out what is causing it :D

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G.G.

answers from Oklahoma City on

It could be hormonal or maybe you need a mood elavator. I think all women go through this at some time or another. I also think you made a good decision to see an OBGYN. Good luck. I've been there and done that.

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M.B.

answers from Lafayette on

Hi,

I know your symptoms all too well and I am only 33. It is hormonal. I was told I am experiencing premenopausal symptoms. I had an episode last week that sounds very similar. I felt as though as I was going crazy and just wanted to be normal. I was very forgetful, couldn't remember the simplest things and couldn't handle anything. I am getting help from a doctor of naturopathy on trying to balance my hormones but it has been 6 months or so and it still is not straight. Not sure how long it will take. There is a book by Dr. John Lee, What Your doctor may not tell you about menopause or something close to that. It is very helpful in explaining alot of things. Also, one thing I noticed with traditional medical doctors here in my area is that they are very quick to write you a prescription for anxiety and depression medication and tell you that is what the problem is. However, I knew it was not that and I personally didn't want to take any meds like that so I tried different doctors till I found one who knew it was hormonal. But if I continue to feel like this I may resort to taking those medications. Hope this has helped you and just know you are not alone in the way you feel. And no, you are not crazy, because that was my biggest problem, thinking that I am losing my mind.. Other women do go through the same things we are experiencing.

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Z.B.

answers from Alexandria on

You are on the right track by talking with your OBGYN. Your story could easily be mine if you changed the names. I was experiencing a chemical imbalance. Once my doctor found the right medication for me I felt wonderful again. Just hang in there and ask your family to bear with you -the real you will be back soon! I always thought that was just an excuse that other people used, but honey it is real.

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M.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Sounds hormonal to me. Glad you made an OBGYN appointment. Menopause is not the same for every one. For example for some women soy helps and some it is very bad. With me it was when I was around my gas stove, when we moved no more problem. Talk to your family about it, ask for their tolerance and help. Tell them you love them and need their help, that you do not mean to be grouchy. That you may say things you do not mean. It is your health problems speaking. Research it on the internet. There are alternate meds that can help some too.

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J.R.

answers from Tulsa on

I'm glad you are going to discuss this with your OBGYN. I'm getting ready to turn 44 and have done some reading about this. It is likely peri-menopause (pre-menopause) symptom but it could also be your thyroid. If you haven't done so already, ask your doc to order a full lab run on your blood. I asked my doc to do this a few years ago and it was uncovered that I had hypo-thyroid. Once we got my thyroid stabilized my energy level increased and my moods leveled out. I urge you to resist anti-depressants as that's the first thing many docs will suggest and they often mask a problem rather than really resolve it. Hang in there...I hope you are feeling much better soon!

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