Rights for Grandparents

Updated on April 20, 2010
N.P. asks from Dallas, TX
11 answers

Are you not allowed to see your grandchild because the parents of the baby are having issues? The parents aren't married and every time they are upset with one another then it will be weeks or months when I could see my grandchild. If any of you have gone through a similar incident can you advice me?

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R.W.

answers from San Francisco on

I think it depends on the state. I know a grandma in WA who had a lot of trouble getting access to her grandchild after her daughter lost custody in a bad divorce.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

I'd say it depends on the Grandparents in question, the laws where the various people live and how much money they have to legally pursue a court ordered visitation agreement. There are grandparents who are the sweetest people you'd ever care to know. And then there are the orneriest bossiest most miserable grandparents (who's kids swore they would Never let their kids live through the misery their parents caused them) you'd love to leave under a rock. How much in the way of rights do you think Michael Jackson's Dad has in regard to Michael s kids (or their trust fund)? Some grandparents can step up to bat if their kids are irresponsible parents and many are raising their grand kids. Others should butt out, quit meddling and get a hobby already.

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G.B.

answers from Tulsa on

I am not aware of Grandparents rights in Texas but it may be worth investigating. Call a local attorney or state agency and ask, or just find a local Grandparents Raising Grandchildren group and see if they have any information for you.

We are raising seveal of my grandchildren and have legal custody. I feel for you not knowing when you can and cannot make plans. Some states are actually adopting laws where the grandparents can have regular scheduled visitations, our society is changing very much and more and more laws are going to be challenged as more grandparents end up raising these children.

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T.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

I have not gone through this but my husband and i have had issues with his mother, so ive researched a little about the subject. I dont know about the laws for your state, you will have to look into that. But i know in mn that if the parents are married there is nothing you can do. It is up to the parents and you would not be able to fight for rights unless it is causing emotional harm to the child, or you had raised the child for a period of time, etc. If the parents are not married then you can fight for rights if they are denying you the right to see the child. Im sure there is more involved and im sure it is a process but that is what i know about it. There are grand parents rights out there, but i think your best bet would be to talk to a lawyer to see exactly what they are for you state. Good luck!

D.D.

answers from Dallas on

The state of Texas recognizes Grandparent's Rights. Therefore if you wish to have visitation you CAN seek it through the courts.

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C.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'm a California grandma a grandparent seeking visitation with our precious 5 year old grand daughter. my 25 year old daughter a single mom, the dad's not involved has never taken responsibility as a mother. she and our grandbaby lived with us all but a short 8 mos. of their lives. As we tried to help her in everyway to care for the child we became the parents of both of them. My daughter does parenting on her terms inbetween the parties, the men. We went from encouraging her to doing it for her, to demanding she become responsible nothing worked. there comes a point were you say its not about the child anymore its about the grandchild it was hard for my daughter to hear and for me to say the words "I don't care about you right now I care about our grand daughter" children think they can just erase you from their childrens lives but they can't, they are just causing their own children pain. I've gone to the courts to seek visitation to continue to provide the stability of love, nurturing, spiritual guidence of our native traditions, a connection to the rest of the family aunties,uncles, grandparents, great grandparents, and great-great grandparents and extended family that were always present and important in her life. I can't afford a lawyer we are defending ourselves, It's a long heart breaking process. But I know our grand daughter is waiting for us, we can't let her down, we can't walk away and let her think we abandoned her!

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N.D.

answers from Dallas on

Hello N., My name is N. (like Christmas). Though I myself have never had this problem I have had a number of friends who have gone through this issue.
My advice is this: No matter the State, Gparents do in fact have rights. It doesn't matter if the parents are married or not!
Yes, you may in fact have to go to court to get your rights enforced, but as I stated before Gparents do have rights!
I see that your from TX (me too), & here in our great State, Gparents have a lot of rights. You will or might have to take it to a civil court to get the matter resolved. But you should be able to see your grandchild no matter if the parents of the child are having issues or not. Sounds like to me they (or 1 of them) is/are using the child as a tool against the other & or you...
There are a lot of Attorney's online or in the yellow pages whichever you choose that will give you "free advice" as to what your rights are & what to do.
Hope this has helped in some way....
N

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Well, they probably don't have moments where you can see them/the grandchild, because they are having problems... and they are not in the mindset, at those times, for socializing and feeling "happy", because they are having problems.

Did they actually tell you, you cannot see the grandchild?
If not, then it is probably just that it is not a good time for them, because of all the problems they are having... and they rather keep it to themselves.

What kind of issues are the parents having? Does it have to do with you, or not?

I assume, their problems are their problems... and not "because" of you.
Sometimes, when a couple is having problems, it is just not something where the parents are compatible and able to plan socials and gatherings and visits with their child... because both parents are fighting and perhaps not even talking to each other or having conflicts over everything and are probably very stressed.

So keep that in mind. It is probably nothing personal against you. They are just having a lot of problems it seems.
You might just ask them, in a neutral way, if you can hang out with your grandchild or offer to babysit for them?

Hopefully, they can work out their problems and perhaps seek counseling. Because constant fighting like that is not good for a baby/child.

Ultimately, things have to be for the good of the child. Again, are the parents literally saying that you cannot see the Grandchild? Is the grandchild in any harm?
You can always consult an Attorney... to see what the situation is.

All the best,
Susan

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W.H.

answers from Dallas on

GPV rights have been very highly over rated compared to the percentage of cases won which are very very minimal and only on certain conditions. There are lawyers out there that will take your money and convince you that you have a winning case when in fact you don't.

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J.D.

answers from Dallas on

I believe it depends on the state you live in

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T.C.

answers from Boston on

Grandparents do have rights. As long as you are not a danger to the child you can go to court and get visitation rights.

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