Post Partum Emotions..

Updated on February 01, 2013
S.E. asks from Caldwell, NJ
4 answers

do you think you would be able to tell wether someone was just going through the post partum crazy hormone thing or wether they could be going through post-pardum depression... especially if it was only someone you talked to frequently but didnt see in person? im not even sure whats going on here, i think this is normal but i could be waay off so i wanted other peoples opinions of the situation..

my cousins a new mom and she seems to be very fragile at the moment. When i first talked to her about it i told her that i felt the same way, your emotions are all over the place because your hormones are all wacky after you give birth, id be happy one minute and the slightest thing could make me cry or made me xtremely angry- that for the first week or so after i had my daughter i just wanted to take her into a closet and hide and for everyone else to jsut leave us alone... and that its one of those things people dont really warn you about while your pregnant, no one seems to mention that after you have the baby your going to be a little nutty for a week or two. My cousin on the other hand insists that its not normal and that other people dont feel the way she does and that its just not normal for her tofeel like crying out of nowhere and for no real reason... she said she tries as hard as she can to keep herself busy because if shes not concentrating on something her mind wanders and starts to think theres something wrong with her.
As far as the baby goes shes doing great honestly shes a natural mom, if she could hold that little girl all day and never put her down she would, her daughter absolutley is everything to her, so its not like shes having issues with dealing with being a parent, she loves every minute of it.. its just her emotional state she cant seem to get a grip on

-shes always been a little, i guess neurotic would be the word.. shes definatley a worrier.. she gets pretty easily worked up.. i told her every day that goes by it will get better and her emotions will go back to normal but she just says i hope so, i cant take this much longer.. she also seems to not want to accept hormones as the answer to why she feels this way.. she says that there has to be a reason for her to just want to cry all of a sudden out of nowhere.. i tell her hormones, she says i hope so.. i just dont know what to tell her to make her see that how shes feeling is normal(at least i think it is?), i told her how i felt and its like it didnt matter, she still thinks somthings wrong with her.. i told her to ask her doctor and shes says yeah i probably will.. but she hasnt

(yes she is the same cousin who told me recently that shes still in a lot of painand its "not normal" - which i asked her about this morning and wouldnt you know, its getting better.. as i said shes a worryer)
-i also told her that she needs to try and get more sleep.. that the more sleep deprived she is the crazyer shes going to feel.. she only sleeps wen the baby sleeps at night, she doesnt ever try to nap during the day while the baby sleeps (he daughter is a week old) I told her to have her boyfriend for one night do 2 of the baby's feedings in a row so that she can get a solid block of sleep, nto just 2 hours at a time and it would make a world of difference.. she said no he works too much i feel bad i cant ask him to do that once he goes to bed i dont him to have to wake up, she says hes offered tons of times because he can see how exhausted she is but she always refuses... i dont know im just running out of things to tell her.. its like i offer suggestions to help and she doesnt want any of them.. i want to help her but im at a point where im not sure how to
**her baby is less than 2 weeks..& i wish this wasnt the case but she lives 6+ hours away

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Can I gently suggest that your cousin open up her own account here and ask her own questions? It must be exhausting for you to be constantly relaying this information and it sounds like she could use some easily accessible information (what mom couldn't)?

Anyway...10 days to a few weeks of hormonal craziness is totally normal. If she's not feeling better at her 6 week appointment then she should talk to her OB about it.

FWIW I only slept when my kids slept and my husband never did any feedings. I didn't have a husband the first time around and with subsequent ones, I was breastfeeding and didn't want to go through having to pump etc. and would have woken up anyway. So I understand her insistance on doing all of the feedings herself. That won't get in the way of her recovery.

Seriously...if she has internet access tell her to just come and join us.

2 moms found this helpful

K.I.

answers from Los Angeles on

It wouldn't hurt for her to see her doctor. A phone call might even do it, if she has a good doctor.

Do you live close? If so, find some time and go help her one day soon. You can watch the baby while she showers and maybe gets some sleep?

I had PPD and it sucked. She sounds a lot like me, I knew I needed help but I wasn't good at asking for it or taking it when it was offered.

2 moms found this helpful
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L.F.

answers from San Francisco on

I would encourage her to see her obgyn and talk about possible ppd. She is lucky to have you encouraging her. I would give her a little time and if you don't see a difference, then talk with her about it again. But since the baby is only a week old, she is probably just exausted.

1 mom found this helpful

N.G.

answers from Dallas on

I just had a baby, 9 weeks ago today. There are so many, MANY things that we have to adjust to after we have a baby. Physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally. When did your cousin have her baby? I remember feeling outright despair when I first had my baby, almost like mourning a lost sense of freedom or something. The change that came over our lives took some real adjusting. If it's not PPD (which I've had with my other two pregnancies), it won't pass. It will linger, sometimes for months or a year or more. If it's just normal baby blues, it will pass relatively quickly (not sure when she had her baby).

I sought the help of a psychiatrist for my 2nd pregnancy, which was a terrible case of PPD. The meds helped so much. With this pregnancy, I started taking a high-dose antidepressant medication before I got symptoms of PPD so that I wouldn't have to go through it again.

Yeah, tell her to get an account here, we'd love to have her. :)

1 mom found this helpful
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