No Santa Question

Updated on November 30, 2009
A.W. asks from Carmichael, CA
17 answers

What is a polite response to someone (e.g. grocery store clerk) asking my 2-year old if she's waiting for Santa to come if we do not celebrate Christmas or "do" Santa?

Thanks.

1 mom found this helpful

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N.M.

answers from San Francisco on

I think when clerks and strangers ask those kinds of things it's just to make small talk. If you don't want to do the smile-and-nod, since she's only 2 you can answer for her, simply and sweetly "oh, we don't do Santa (Christmas), but isn't the weather lovely today?"

We celebrate Christmas but not the whole Santa bit (like one of the other moms said). And now that my kids are older (6 and 8) and understand a lot, they know how to do the smile-and-nod and talk later about how some people do Santa and others don't and how not to spoil other people's fun with it. They know not to say "We know Santa isn't real!!" because there might be Santa-believing kids around.

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R.W.

answers from San Francisco on

How about "We are enjoying the season, thank you" ...said with a friendly smile.

Because this is a stranger, you have no obligation to explain your family traditions.

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H.D.

answers from San Francisco on

We don't celebrate Christmas, thank you.
Or just smile and nod.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.N.

answers from Detroit on

I have three small kids. A four and a half year old,three and a half year old and a two year old and we celebrate Christmas but I dont let them believe in Santa because I dont believe in lying to my kids or letting them believe in things that just arent real. Anytime someone asks my kids are they excited for Santa, I just tell them that they know Santa is Mommy and that they are excited for Christmas. If you dont celebrate Christmas at all, I suggest just explaining to people that your children do not celebrate the season but that they are excited for the snow and any other celebration that you do celebrate around that time of the year.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Sounds like friendly and courteous clerks, asking a common question. (after all, it is almost the Christmas season) You can simply say, "no, we are here to buy sox," (or whatever). Or =, alternatively, No, we don't celebrate Xmas in our home." simple, sweet, and friendly, no reason to take offense or become defensive. Have a great Holiday, in whatever way you celebrate. My very good friend is JW and they do not celebrate any holiday's, but she is always just non-committal and friendly about it. It works!

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

Dear A W,
I think it must be hard for someone who works at a grocery store or in retail and sees hundreds of people a day to know what to say while trying to be engaging and not offensive to someone. If they slip up and say the wrong thing according to your traditions or beliefs, I don't think they mean to do it and how can they possibly know what is and isn't safe to say to someone?
Your child will learn your traditions and how to answer for herself. But with a 2 year old in tow, in a public and busy store, all I ever said was, "We're waiting for it to be summer again." Which is never a lie, I hate cold weather, and it changes the subject because it doesn't matter what your beliefs are, it's a drag to go out in the pouring rain and freeze your hiney off.
You can't go anywhere without there being Christmas trees and Santas and it's just part of the world we live in. What you teach your child about it can be done at home. In line at the grocery store is not the place to debate or declare beliefs, in my opinion.
Put yourself in the shoes of someone who works at that job and most likely dreads the whole season because it means more time working and less time being home with their families doing whatever their own traditions call for. Every once in a while, having a patient customer who understands and says, "I can't believe how busy you are. I hope you don't have to work too late...." is all it takes for them to feel appreciated.
They get their heads bitten off enough as it is. They don't need to feel like they've offended someone when they weren't trying to.

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A.S.

answers from Modesto on

What DO you celebrate? Explain that some people celebrate Christmas with Santa (and some without Santa), but that your family celebrates___ (fill in the blank). You can explain this to your child and she will certainly tell those who ask her about Santa.

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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

When another person is simply trying to be kind to your child, there's no need to respond in a manner that might be embarassing or offensive. If your child is old enough they can respond in the ways in which they are taught. Before that time, you can simply smile, pay your bill and go on.

Unsurprisingly, many people who are non-Christian still like to celebrate the traditions of Christmas, including a visit with Santa. I have yet to see anyone approach a parent and say excuse me that child looks like a Muslim, Hindu, Buddist, athiest etc., and probably doesn't belong in the Santa line.

It's a hard old world out there, kids grow up faster and faster as it is. I would recommend letting a child be a child and have some fantasies and fun because sometimes reality BITES.

Blessings.....

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D.G.

answers from San Francisco on

We don't celebrate Halloweeen and our kids don't dress up but they are always asked what they are going to be. The way I answer is politely and friendly say we don't dress up for Halloween and then try to ask the clerk a friendly question to make sure they are not embarrassed or offended. They are doing their job by being friendly and making conversation with you and the kids, you should be polite.

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C.P.

answers from Sacramento on

If you do not celebrate Christmas or use the Santa fun then I feel the best approach is a polite response to anyone who asks, "Thank you for your question but, we do not celebrate Christmas." Or "Thank you for your question but, we do not Celebrate Santa." Even though the majority of Americans do celebrate the wonderful Holiday that is Christmas and many do participate in the fun of Santa Clause, that a polite and honest response will be respected.

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A.T.

answers from Stockton on

They seem to be stuffing Christmas down our throats extra early this year!
I think the smile & nod response is fine.
People can be really rude if you give them too much info. Our last name is arabic and my son has very curly hair and people have asked where we're from etc. More than once if I answered that Hubby is arabic thus the curls or unusual last name I've been asked in response if he beats me.
More than once, in more than one city...
Now, if someone asks about our surname I just quip "oh, that's my husband's fault!"
If you feel like messing with a particular clerk - perhaps the one at Safeway that put the bananas on top of the bread..." Shhh! my child is terrified of Santa!" ;)

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P.W.

answers from San Francisco on

Let your child answer the way she wants to.

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L.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I don't know we are always dealing with this interested to hear others!

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R.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I would evade the question with a non answer like some others suggested. Sort of like how they ask "How are you today?". How many people really answer that? Just answer something like "Lovely weather today" or "Could I have paper bags please?" or "Do you take American Express?".

We didn't do Santa either, more because my son figured it out pretty early - he was the kid in Kindergarten who was put in the corner for "spoiling it for all the other children" by saying there is no such thing as Santa or the Tooth Fairy. We didn't lie, but we didn't encourage them either.

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D.C.

answers from Fresno on

It depends on how much of a conversation you want to have. You could easily say "We don't celebrate Christmas" or "We're not Christian". But that could start a conversation (not like you can just leave your groceries there LOL) you may not want to get in to.

You could also say something like "We don't do the whole Santa thing" or as mentioned earlier "She knows I'm Santa".

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M.F.

answers from Salinas on

having grown up with no santa being Jewish, and now facing that with my kids... I can tell you its not going anywhere. I would probably get used to it when its the random person, and the more important people just explain to them that you don't do that. If you are not doing santa with your kid then he will figure it out soon enough and be able to come up with his own responses in a few years. For right now I know at least my two year old would say yes if you asked her if she was waiting for the blue beluga to come... it won't have a serious impact for a few years. When it does just deal with it from the inside... otherwise you will spend from Thanksgiving to New Years telling people the same thing over and over... although sometimes I do make a side comment about how we had a LOVELY Hannukah or something that points out that Santa was not part of the equation. Hope that helps

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A.L.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi there
You could just politely say, we don't celebrate Christmas or do Santa, but we do celebrate the spirit of giving..(smile) and yeah, we are always looking forward to that.

Thing is.... doesn't matter, race, creed or religion... Giving can be celebrated all the time.. turn the negative into a positive...

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