Need Nice Way to Word This

keep it short and sweet. 'invited guests only, please' should be sufficient. anyone crass enough to show up after that and say 'can poindexter's 3 brothers stay too?' you can just smile and say 'you can buy food and tokens for them right over there. i'll be busy supervising the party, but you guys have fun!'
don't over-explain.
khairete
S.

Just note on the invitiations that the party is limited to invitees only and a parent if they want to stay to supervise their child due to chucky cheese party limitations. But they can feel free to pay for entry for their additional children, but party favors and pizza are limited to the party guests.

Well, first I'd not re-invite people who crashed your party. Any of them. That little girl's mom is clueless or rude. I don't blame you for being mad.

Second, I'd put something like "Due to the venue, we cannot extend an invitation to cousins or siblings. Please RSVP by x date so we have an accurate count." You can also tell the venue that you do NOT approve extra kids so if they are not on the list, they should tell the parents they can't stay. Sometimes the venue itself will be the bad guy for you.

I would write 'Due to the venue, space is limited. The party table is limited to invited children only. Parents welcome to stay and enjoy all Chuck E Cheese has to offer with your children."

Goodness, your last party sounds like a nightmare! Hope this party is better. Happy bday to your little man!

I have been in that situation before, not easy! Chuck E Cheese is a bit easier however! You have a designated area set up for your party so all you have to do is have names at the seats for each child you invited. Everyone else gets to sit at the next available table. If any extra child comes and sits in one of the assigned spots you gently point out the name and that is so and so 's seat. Make sure you put on the invitation that food and drinks will be provided for the child on the invite but others are more than welcome to purchase their own.

"Parent and invited child only, please." Or as others put it, "Due to limited space at Chuck's, we don't have room for siblings -- one parent and the invited child only, please."

If someone ignores this and brings extra kids: You or your designated adult (don't do it yourself, have a close and tough adult friend do this job) says, "Hi, you're here for Little Man's party? Your name? Great. I see you've got a couple of kids with you -- who's Sam's invited friend? Sally here? Nice. Sally and you as the parent are part of the party, and that includes pizza and drinks at the party table, but other kids will need to have entry tickets and their own table if you want, and you can get that right over there at the counter." Or whatever's appropriate for the setup.

In other words, yes, a kiddie bouncer, who with a big smile lets the parent know that he or she and one invited child are paid for but the other kids are not and are not welcome to sit down and chow on pizza at the birthday table. The job should go to someone who isn't afraid to say to a parent, "We're glad all the kids are here to have fun but the party itself is limited to the invited child and one parent as the invitations noted."

I hope you don't have to go this route but if you're really concerned about this happening despite however you word the invitations -- I'd truly have someone prepared to sort the groups as they come in. You might not have to do it at all but be prepared.

It think the families who brought multiple kids to the earlier party were way beyond rude and thoughtless. I doubt you'll have the same issue at a place like Chuck's where most parents generally know that it costs the hosts per person.

I think the answer that talks about "pick up" and "drop off" is a little bizzare... I would NOT drop my 4 year old off at what is essentially a strangers house and expect the parents of the birthday kid to supervise all the children by themselves during the party. Wierd. In fact, most parents I know would be totally pissed if you tried to drop off your kid and roll out! If you invite preschoolers, expect a parent to attend too. I dont expect to be feed or entertained, just present.

This happens all the time and it baffles me. I would NEVER bring an univited guest to a party without asking first! Last year we had my son's birthday at a play gym. One mother called to ask if the younger son could come because her husband had to attend a funeral and couldn't watch him. Good reason, of course. As for the other two parents who brought univited guests (one brought an older sibling and the other brought some neighborhood kid), they were greeted by the very friendly hostess at the party place who asked for "the name of the invited guest". She checked off the child on the list we provided and then let the mothers know that if the other children were coming in, they would need to pay $5 each to play. Both parents were suprised, but because it was coming from the "place" and not from me, they paid for it.

How would I word it? Clear and simple:
"Due to the limitations of the party package, we are only able to accommodate the child who has been inivted by ____." Thank you for understanding and we look forward to seeing you!

I would also do little place cards with the children's names on them and put names on the goodie bags. Children who are not invited will not have a seat. Mom will have to purchase that child's food and tokens.

There will be extra kids there, so decide ahead of time how you guys want to handle it!

"Because you are ________ Super Friend, YOU are invited to...."

The people that brought extra people to your party without even asking you, was very rude.
I would start by not inviting those people again.
Seriously, I have never heard of anyone being that rude!

Wording on the invitation: "Sorry, no extras or siblings are included this time. It is a large venue though, so if you'd like to stay to supervise other children, I am sure it will be fun!"

I was also thinking that you could have bracelets at the check in counter at Chuck e Cheese's, so that when actual invited kids arrive they get one to signify they are part of the party and paid for. Then you can say to parents, "I've got little Susie covered, if you want to stay with the other kids you can buy them tokens and food over there."

You are getting great suggestions for the invitation wording. I think you also need to be prepared for what to say to those folks who try to seat extra people at the guest table on the day of the party. What a pain, it's not like birthday parties aren't hectic enough. Can your hubby or a friend help you with keeping the "extras" at bay??

Good Luck,

I'm so glad my kiddos are past this age, birthday party day wore me out!!!

M

I don't know but when you find a nice way to put it and it actually works let us know.

I just for the first time this year decided to do a friend party for my girls. (They were both born in September) I invited half the allotted amount for my one daughter and the other half allowed for my other daughter. So the package included 12 kids. Each could choose six, so the picking was done carefully. My youngest daughter however just started K at a new school so we randomly picked. The one mom I handed it to, said oh how fun she should definitely be able to make it, heck my youngest might too. I was caught off guard.

I've seen this happen at other birthday parties my daughter has gone too. I've NEVER done it. One time I took my youngest at the same time as my oldest but my husband and I bowled with her on a completely different lane down the way from the party. The mom ended up including her in the cake...but that did not cost extra and she came up and asked if she'd like some. My daughter was no where near to beg.

I wish more people would just consider the cost and understand adding is not always feasible anyway. I know the venue I picked said I had to call if I went over the allotted 12 as they would need to bring in another person to help with the kids.

simple way to handle this..RUDELY,
hey, there are being rude to you by inviting themselves over AND bringing someone else along for the freebies ! you simply say LOUDLY to the people that invited themselves and brought other people with them, I AM SORRY, BUT YOU WERE NOT INVITED LEAVE NOW OR I AM CALLING THE POLICE ! my husband's ex wife did something like that, SHE "invited" eight extra kids ( three or four extra kids showed up..plus their very hungry parents) to a birthday party my husband and i were were hosting for his son, the exwife had told everyone that ben and i would gladly pay for anything they and their kids wanted off the menu!i know because i got to tell everyone of these "extra adults"," i am sorry, but we did not promise to pay for food and drinks for the adults, just the kids. if you are hungry, i suggest you talk to "the exwife" who promised to pay for it, she's right over there". now the extra kids got cake and ice cream right along with "invited kids" , they are just kids, and not responsible for a scheming exwife , the "extra adults", however took turns glaring at "the exwife". ben and i, after the bill was paid, drove 800 miles back to midlothian on fumes and empty tummies, and a little bit wiser when it comes to dealing with his exwife
K. h.

I don't have any advice, but I was on the opposite side of this a couple of weeks ago. My daughters girlfriend (1st graders) was having a birthday party at the Bounce House. I knew my husband was going to have to work; therefore I would have to take my son as well. I called the mother and asked if it would be ok if I brought my son. She said it was fine. I paid for my son's entrance (which was what I was expecting to do since I was essentially inviting my son). After we were there and talking she asked if I had added him to the birthday party list. I told her no since he hadn't been invited originally. She looked almost offended. I don't know what the other parents who brought siblings did. All of the girls are the same age and most of the brothers are the same age as well, so it works great.

As for your situation, I would put something to the effect of due to limited space __________ is invited to share in celebrating DS's birthday. Parent is also invited to stay.

Have someone who is more of a heavy make sure to point the kids when they get there in the right direction and if they didn't rsvp, oh well, parents can pay for them separately. I would also allow for a few extra. If you get 6 rsvp's I would add 2-3 extra children just in case.

Good luck!!

First off I find it unbelievable that people would expect it to be okay to bring other children, even siblings, to a party without first checking with the host. Not acceptable where I come from. I think you should put on the invitations something like "Unfortunately, due to limited space, we are only able to accomodate invited children; please do not bring additional guests" or "unfortunately, due to limited space, we have to request that only invited children attend." I know that seems a little blunt but you clearly you are going to have to lay it out for some people - just try to do it as nicely as you can.

I totally agree I have my best girl friends that have many kids and as they get older I say hey do you mind if I only invite #3 and #4 since the other ones are older. I think it is rude to assume that just because 1 of your kids is invited to something that all of your kids are invited. Maybe try to address the envelope to that kid only and maybe make your own invitation say something like so and so requests the presence of so and so to this birthday party....... Make it very clear that you are inviting only that one child. But I still think if it doesn't say family or something like that don’t assume that all you kids can attend the party.

Welcome to the DC area! We have been stationed here for 10 years and still can’t get used to the entitled attitude people have in the NCA. Where you put the RSVP by date just add so that you can have an accurate account due to venue. If a parent calls and says something about an additional child just kindly tell them they are willing to stay however they would need to ensure that child was taken care of.
Chuckie cheese is an easy place to limit the amount of un-invited children; love, love the name cards next the plate idea

I think you just need to put your foot down, in the future. I am so sick of the rudeness that comes out when someone host's a kid's party. I will have no issues turning people away or cutting people off or being very blunt on the invitiations. "Since we all know how pricey a Chuck E. Cheese party is, we ask that only the invited child and one parent come. Please, no siblings or extra people, as we won't be able to feed or entertain them. We appreciate your understanding & courtesy & hope to see you!"

Hi, Keisha:

Be prepared.
Be inclusive.
Be kind.
Ask for help.
Good luck.
D.

I would use the words "drop off" and "pick up". I remember when I had a home party for my sons fourth birthday and a bunch of adults stayed. It didn't even occur to me that any parents would want to stay, and I was not prepared to entertain adults, and it was very awkward. It could have been that the parents thought they needed to stay and supervise their kids, and since they happen to have siblings, then they have to bring them along too. Anyway, after that party I always specified "drop off" and "pick up".

Note: We didn't invite strangers to the parties. We only invited children we knew and who regularly came to our home for playdates without parents. I suppose if you were inviting strange kids to the party, you may then expect a parent to stay. Of course if you are asking a parent to stay, then you may expect siblings, as not everyone can get away without their other kids, or afford a babysitter for a birthday party.

I am the resident "mean" one in my camp. I let unexpected people know when they show up that I was not expecting them. Maybe I say the actual words to them--"Oh, hi. I wasn't expecting you." Maybe I use prepared name tags or place cards--if they don't find their names, guess what that means? I might even have the kids sit at a separate table until everybody else is seated and have had their first servings. I don't send anybody away, but I make them feel like they crashed a party, which is what they did.

The wording--I would go with something like this:

"CHILD'S NAME (all caps in the middle of the page) is invited to celebrate with us...." If you want, add, "CHILD'S NAME plus one parent...".

ETA: I love the idea of "invited guests only". What a shame that we have to specify that. The invitation with the name should be clear enough. Ugh!

wow- that party sounded like a disaster. did the other parents not see what was going on? Hello you brought extra children and now I don't have enough stuff. I am sure you had a mixture of emotions going on. and you were probably embarrassed. I would just write on the invitation that only the children listed can come. No extra children can be brought with out calling first. Plus the parents should be there too, how can you enjoy your daughters birthday party if you have to play daycare?