Need Advice for No More Thumb Sucking

I am looking for the same advice. I have the same problem with my little 5 year old. I have some friends that have a 4 year old that had to have a plate put in the roof of her mouth because her teeth were already bowing out. It stopped her from sucking her thumb right away. The dentist told me that if mine didn't stop that she would have to do the same thing to her.

My son was a pacifier baby.I would not let him suck pacifier (about age 2) anymore. My nephew sucked his thumb, my son just picked up something else he started sucking his thumb because he needed some comfort.Stopped sucking thumb (age 10 my son)
Nephew stopped age 4. kindergarden. Its ok.Let him suck his THUMB. You are only a CHILD ONCE. "If not the thumb then what".

The worst offenders for giving advise are childless family and friends!!! i have known quite a few. my daughter sucked her thumb when tired and sleeping. people told us to put tabasco sauce on her thumb, how horrid can some people be!!! we just let her out grow it on her own whic she did during the day about 5 and at night about 6. my son sucked his tougue, which looked so cute laying there sleeping, making the cutest little noises. Niether ever needed braces. By the way I found the best thing for the busy bodies to tell them not to speak about anything about child issues to or infront of my kids, or there would be very angery mom to deal with!!!!

I'm a tongue sucker and the dentist said I'd need braces and I don't. You are right not to put pressure on him. Just keep loving him and being supportive.

S., mom to 4 girls, all with high sensory needs and suck their hands, thumbs ect occasionally (one whenever she is sleepy.)

I have a three year daughter who sucks on her thumb .She will be four in Sept. ! We tried the THUM that you can buy at some pharmacies . Its less then $ 5.00 a bottle . All u do is put it on the childs nails like you would when painting them. Its used for nail biting and thumb sucking . Need less to say it did not work on my daughter. She likes hot stuff !! My dentist told me that if she don't stop by the age of 4 that she might end up needing braces for her teeth later on in life . He also mentioned to us about getting her the ThumbGuard which cost any where from $ 69.95 and up . But is supposed to break them of sucking their thumb in 3 weeks. We have not tried this yet !! If you hear of anything else please let me know so I can try on my child . Also please let me know what you decide to do and if it works . Good Luck !!

Donna,

I had the same worries about my daughter and her thumbsucking.
My Ped. told me that when she went to bed and feel asleep to gently remove her thumb, so that she did not suck it while she was sleeping.
She went to our Dentist,specializing in children, since she was two and I asked him and since parents were not allowed in the room, I do not know what he said but she stopped sucking it.
When my son came along four years later he also was a thumb sucker, but this time my 6 year old told him not to do that and he stopped.
Must be that someone else should talk to him about this. I was told that we should not punish or talk down to either of the children.
I must say that they are 27 and 31 years old now and do not suck their thumbs.
Good Luck, for even though they stopped, it cost us a fortune for braces.

Donna Kay,
I feel for you. I have a 5 yr old who still takes a paci. He still sucks it, as a baby would. I know it is how he soothes and comforts himself. I've spoken to his dentist about it and she says not to take it away. If he uses it and it messes up his teeth, we'll deal with that later. I know that orthodontic work is one of those things people say - "what about the teeth". Most kids these days have braces anyway - without sucking a thumb or paci. I had a cousin who sucked his thumb way into childhood. He is a grown man and does not suck his thumb. I think there are worse things to worry about. I would leave him alone. If you are concerned, you could ask a therapist about teaching him other self-soothing methods. He will not suck his thumb forever. Oh, and those people who recommend having a dentist put prongs in the roof of their mouth - shame on them. If that is how he finds his comfort, that is inconceivable to take that away from him without teaching him other methods first. Prongs seem very barbaric and cruel.
Good luck to you and God Bless,
K.

I gotta tell you, I don't think your sister has a leg to stand on here. It makes no difference if she is a nanny, making a parenting decision like taking away a child's self-comfortt should be made by the PARENTS. If she had a concern, and she were a paid nanny, she should take it to the PARENTS first, not berate a child (and to an almost-five-year-old boy, being compared to a baby is the highest insult.) She had NO right to tell your son what she did, before talking to you first. When she pops out her own kiddos and sees that it's not exactly the same as even working with kids a lot, then she can make those decisions for herself.

I have an almost-five-year-old as well, and have asked his pediatrician, and my best friend (a school psychologist) if I should be trying to get him to stop sucking his fingers, and they both answered with a very emphatic NO.

Think about it, the amount of time your son has before he starts kindergarten is six months, or roughly a little more than 1/10 of his life. You know how different they are in six months! Look back to what your child was like at Halloween, and tell me, are there some things he does differently now? He has plenty of time to "big boy up" in time for kindergarten.

And telling him that he won't be allowed to suck his fingers in kindergarten is not necessary. What's the point in lying to him? They won't make him stop, but his friends very likely could tease him enough to get him to stop on his own.

And where are all these hairbrained rationalities coming from? I have a son who is six (in kindergarten) and one who is almost five (been in preschool until recently, starting kindergarten in the fall.) The oldest weaned himself as a baby, but the younger still sucks his fingers. My nephew (exactly the same age) sucks his thumb. My son's classmates, and my nephew's classmates, often do it, too (I've been there during naptime). He's not alone, and he'll almost certainly grow out of it just fine.

Tell sis to back off.

Hello Donna Kay, You hit the nail on the head in your first sentence. He only sucks his thumb when he's tired or stressed. Leave him alone and as he matures and his coping skills increase the sucking will decrease. At least he doesn't have a Binky plugged in his mouth ! I speak from personal experience. You're right about school, peer pressure is good sometimes. One more gem of advise.......start saving for braces, because if he keeps this up for very long, you'll need them. By the way, don't pay any attention to your sister and tell her to keep her opinions to herself or discuss them with you.
Pick your battles......this one isn't worth the stress it causes. Good Luck, S.

About me: Retired RN, M of 2, GM of 5, GGM of 1

Just let him be. The more you push, the more he may need his thumb. More than likely, when he gets into school, he'll stop on his own. I was/am a dental hygienist and the dentist and I would tell our patient's parents, that to push the kids may cause issues else where. There may be a reason that a child needs the comfort of thumb sucking and pushing for a stop may cause stress to show up in other areas. As for the child needing braces, the orthodontist can correct any issues that may or may not come up with his thumb sucking.

My daughter just turned 6 and she does the the same thing. But hers is the index finger and the middle finger together. My peditrican told me it is a comfort thing for most children and they grow out of it. The telling him only babies do that is negative and should not be said. This is what my peditrician said. She is in school and is doing it less and less. So she is growing out of it. And he will gow out of it especially when school starts, but if you can hang in there try to avoid the negative on it. Also try to keep his hands busy if he does do it other than nap time or bedtime. I let my daughter pick out a bear and told her she couldn't suck her fingers because she need to hokd on to her bear. And it seems to be working. Good luck

Hi my name is W. and I have a 3 year old boy. Well I was around that age when I stop sucking my thumb. You say that he is not doing it that much and hopefully it get down to not doing it at all. Tell him that you will treat him with a Mcdonald's happy meal once a week if he doesn't suck his thumb all week or tell him you will take him to a park to play on Saturday or Sunday if he doesn't suck his thumb. People have always tell me that you should put hot sauce or whatever to get them not to suck their thumb. If you like my ideas, go for it. Or if you thought of something else that will work for you and your little boy then go for it. So good luck!

My son sucked his thumb until he was 7 and my daughter just stopped at 6. At that point they were both only sucking at night so I didn't have to worry about catching them during the day.
My son was very stubborn - we tried the thumb polish, visit with the dentist, books, etc. but nothing worked. Finally, I used a bandage to wrap up his hand, pinned it with safety pins and sat by his bed each night until he fell asleep. For him, sucking his thumb was a habit and he wasn't convinced he could fall asleep without it. Once I had sat by his bed for around 5 nights, he knew he could fall asleep and didn't suck his thumb again. The dentist had told me at that point that if he stopped sucking his thumb soon, his teeth would have time to move back to where they belong and he would most likely not need braces. He is 13 now and has a beautiful smile - no braces needed!
We tried to get my daughter to stop when she was three using the thumb guard but it didn't work for her. This year (now 6), she wanted to get her ears pierced and we told her that only kids who don't suck their thumbs get their ears pierced. I wrapped up her hand and stayed with her at night for 5 nights until she knew that she could fall asleep without it.
Both kids wore the bandages on their hands for at least 21 nights total. They both had lovies as well and I didn't take them away because I figured that if they didn't have their thumbs anymore they should at least have their other comfort object.
It was a time consuming process for both but well worth the effort. Hope that helps!

let him alone he will quit when he does not need it first grade is another whole ball game very very few have not given it up by then

I whole heartedly agree with the leave it alone plan. I too sucked my thumb until I was 12. I was painfully shy and people picked on me because of my weight. It was when I felt secure enough in myself that I quit. But the more my mom said about it, the worse it got. Sounds like your 5 year old has it going on - he will kick the habit sooner than you think! And kudos to him for standing up for himself!

My daughter just turned 5 and we just got her to stop sucking her thumb. We've been telling her for years that when she stops sucking her thumb she can have a bike and that's been the extent of our discussions. Then I noticed that she was really only sucking her thumb to soothe herself if she was upset or tired. I did a little research and this is what ended up working...I was very casual (actually folding laundry when I told her I wanted to talk to her about being a big girl) and I explained that sucking her thumb was a dirty thing to do. That she let germs in her mouth that could make her sick and it really wasn't fair to her other fingers that she only sucked her thumb. I told her that whenever she was ready, that I was willing to help her stop sucking her thumb. That we could put band-aids on her thumb to help her remember. I told her it was really her decision and she just needed to let me know she was ready. When she did stop sucking her thumb, we would go to the store and she could pick out any bike she wanted. An hour or so later, she said she wanted me to help her. I got some large bandages from the dollar store and we put it on her thumb. The first night was the worst because she couldn't get to sleep. My parents were actually babysitting and in on everything so my mom laid with her for awhile then my dad laid with her and he fell asleep before she did. It literally took HOURS for her to fall asleep that first night. I wasn't sure it was worth all this trouble. But the next night, she said she thought she needed band-aids on both thumbs, and she fell asleep a bit faster. Those were really the roughest days. After that, she wanted band-aids on all her fingers, she even wore them to school a few days. Then, one day, she took them off at school and a few days later she stopped asking for band-aids at all. I gave her a treat to McDonald's about a week and a half in without sucking her thumb. We waited a total of a little more than a month to go buy her Limited Edition Princess bike. She has never looked back on sucking her thumb and it made her appreciate her bike more than anything else we've ever given her. Aside from the investment in band-aids (I really do recommend the dollar store because my daughter when through them fast! We got the ugly, basic ones for her thumb so it didn't become something cute she was doing) and two late nights, it wasn't that hard. Hope this helps. Good luck!

Don't push the issue. Thumbsucking makes kids feel safe and is comforting for them. I would tell him that it's not polite to do it in public and if he wants to suck his thumb he should go to his room and do it in private. You should never make a child feel bad about habits and the more you nag the more they'll obsess over it. Eventually he'll chose a social setting and no thumb sucking over solitude in order to suck his thumb. You may want to suggest to your sister to ignore him and let you handle the situation. It's really not her business and she obviously didn't take a mature approach with your child.

It's funny we share the same request. You are welcome to read some of the comments regarding my request for thumb sucking. My daughter is now 10 and it has become a problem. Not all kids grow out of this as they attend school age, not that she sucks her thumb at school but she does at home. I've already had one incident where the lump on her thumb became a nasty infection but treated and took care of it at the doctor's office at UPA on Rockprairie. Dr. Anderson was gentle when helping my little girl at the time. My main concern now days is this other side habit she's developed. In her trial of wanting to quit sucking on her thumb she scrapes her top of her nails to her teeth. It results in her nails turning red as if she had a non stop file going after them. And it is what is sounds like too. Eeek! I know! Well you are welcome to write anytime on follow ups and stuff. ~Prissy

I can understand why your son was mad when she basically called him a baby. No one wants to be ridiculed, and yet, as you say, the other kids will do just that if he's still doing it at school. My grandson sucked his thumb, but we realized he only did it when he was holding his favorite small stuffed animal. Once my daughter reasoned with him (at 5) that he had to stop to keep from damaging his teeth, she let him keep the animal at night. Gradually, she took it away entirely. We thought he would have a harder time with it than he did, but everyone survived!

JoyceP
www.prepareandsucceed.com

This is such a small problem. Tell your sister to (butt out) politely that is. I worked for an orthodontist for 18 years. Every child is different. Like you said some stop young some suck their fingers or thumb into the teenage years. 5 years old is still very young. Many kinder's suck their thumb. He will start getting uncomfortable when other children tease him. It may become a bedtime ordeal. Anyway, my suggestion to you is tell him when he is ready to stop sucking his thumb you have a wonderful fun trick that will help. He will go to the grocery with you and pick out any kind of popcycles he wants. Everyday he will eat one and then you will break the stick in two and tape one half around his thumb. This will prevent the sucking of the thumb but he has to want to do this. Good luck.
PS. My oldest son sucked his thumb until he was 6.

Good for your son for standing up for himself! What a secure and solid child, at age five - I bet you are so proud!!! He clearly knows what is important to him and this is his way to self-soothe. Nanny or not, it is NEVER okay to shame a child! She clearly is basing her child-rearing protocol on old-paradigm parenting and that doesn't work to help produce healthy and secure kids.

It is fine and very appropriate - what you said to him re not in school - he can soothe at night and at home. When he no longer needs this, he will stop. It is not up to adults to judge a child's needs - they are what they are and we are all wired differently. We as adults, rather should gently guide them, and certainly talk with them about how it helps them, etc...

I am so proud of your son! Being able to stand his position against a "big person" is quite something.

Alli