Looking for Some Advice - Philadelphia,PA

I am going to be blunt, he does not deserver you. You are better then him. If your are strong enought to raise one child by yourself, then you can do it again. There are so many men out there that would love to be with you, and you must believe that. I know you are hurting right now, and it is so hard, but if you believe your are strong, you will be able to get through it. What you should do, is call your friends, get all dressed up, and go out for a night. A girls night out. Have fun. No women, and I mean no women should be treated like that. An if a man does that to you, then he is not a man at all. A true man would not do that, and would not leave at that time when you are going through alot. My advice is to go out for a night, then go and file for child suport, and make him face up to his responiablity. Then when you get his check every month, take a picture of you holding it with a smile. Also if he still has his things there pack them up and drop them off at his sisters house. Remeber you are better then this, and no on has a right to treat you like that.

One day at a time. With the support of people you can count on. Don't be afraid to ask for help. You are going to need it. If he comes back, you 2 will have a lot to talk about. Try to be calm and not yell, when you feel your self slipping into uncontrolled anger take a break and step away for a min. Fight fair, trust me on that. I dont need to go into my drama BC this advice is for you. And Im going to share what others have shared with me. You will have days where you dont want to get out of bed. And days where you hate him for doing this to you. Write in a journal, its helped me to get my emotions out. If you can go to shrink, go. It will help you to learn how to care for you & your boys, and deal with the stress, & emotions your feeling.
Dont count on him to make you happy. Make yourself happy first. You will get through this, one day at a time. Dont call or beg & plead with him. As hard as it is, stop contacting him. It only makes them more distant. If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, its yours. If it doesnt it never was.
Feel free to contact me. You need people to lean on.
E.

C.,
I just feel like hugging you. You really don't deserve to be treated like that! But I suggest that you try and listen to his reasons for leaving once he does come back (that is if he comes back, and if he wants to stay with you). It's possible that he got overwhelmed and didn't know how to deal with fatherhood. Let him know that you two can only stay strong as a couple if you're honest with your fears, and that you'll be there for him. But he has to be there for you! Good luck and please know that there are a lot of us who support you in any decision you make or condition you're in.

I am so sorry for you. I am hoping that your boyfriend is maybe just scared and is running away. I am also hoping that he snaps out of it and makes the right decision to take care of his precious woman and baby. It may seem really hard to do but maybe you can try to give him the space he needs right now. Focus all your energy on healing yourself and caring for your kids and hopefully he will see the err of his ways.

Good luck and know that there are many people out here that care about you.