Is Anyone Else Distraught over How Sad the World Can Be?

Updated on May 27, 2011
S.S. asks from Los Angeles, CA
15 answers

I just read an article about how a father lost two sons (a 3 year old and a 15 month old) in the storm that's raging in the midwest. They found the 3 year old's body floating in a lake. How incredibly sad. I don't know why but ever since I had my son 2 years ago, I think about death daily -- how devastated I would be if I were to die leaving my son motherless or how unbearable it would be if my son were to die or fall seriously ill... is something wrong with me?? It's gotten to the point where I really can't even watch the news anymore without being so sad about how the world can be so cruel. I just wish that the good Lord would come down already so my family and I can just go to Heaven and enjoy each other without the fear of death separating us. Am I nuts???

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Thanks wonderful Mamas...sometimes I feel that only another mother can understand what I'm feeling/thinking/etc. You've all made me feel better once again :)

Featured Answers

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

When my son was young I couldn't watch the news for several years.
There is always something going on that's incredibly sad.
That's why it's important to look for the few things that go right.
Look for butterflys, fireflys and rainbows.
Take time to fly some kites.
Splash in puddles while you can.
You can find a lot of J. in simple things if you are just open to them.

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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

No, you're not nuts. Becoming a mom makes you very aware of how fragile life can be. And it's tough to let go of the anxiety of anything happening to your child on your "watch."

But if you believe in God and heaven, you need to seek help from God with your anxiety. He tells us not to be anxious because it robs us of the J. He means for us (at least that's my interpretation from reading my Bible - not that I want to speak for God). Life is tough - it's meant to be that way imho. But God's grace helps us, and sometimes makes us even more aware of what He has done for us.

Good luck and I will pray for you. Enjoy your sweet child every moment you can because it goes quickly (mine are 17 and almost 14 and it seems like yesterday they were 5 and 2).

<<hugs>>

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M.B.

answers from Washington DC on

Nothing is wrong with you. it is very sad- all the death and hate and disasters in this world. I personally believe that the world will always be this way- that there will never be "peace on earth" as long as we share it with mankind.

But, dwelling on it doesn't fix the problems. I believe God wants us to find the J. and glory in this world. There is SO much to be thankful for! SO MUCH BEAUTY AND LOVE! You can also volunteer to help situations that you maybe can change. That can help you inwardly knowing that you are making a difference- be it big or small. Although I don't think there will be perfection in this world, I DO believe in making the world better. Maybe since this is weighing you down so much, volunteering could be a great way to lift your spirits.

Enjoy your children as they are now (I'm sure you already do!). Every day is special. They are a gift. Something COULD happen- but only deal with that sorrow IF it happens. Don't think about it now. Enjoy life and what you have now- live it to it's fullest. If it is "time" for any of you, it is best to leave this earth with the peace that you made the best of it when you were here.

God Bless

5 moms found this helpful

T.B.

answers from Bloomington on

I worry the other way around! If somethings happens to myself or my husband, how would my kids cope? Are they too young to even remember us if we did die? I'm telling you...It's some deep stuff! I just pray daily thanking the Lord for the time I have here on this Earth and try to love my family the best I can while I'm here!

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

When you have a child, the sadness and grief is certainly magnified because you can relate on the most basic level.
Before I had a child, when someone would die tragically, inevitably the first thing people would ask was "did he/she have kids?" and I used to think "Wow...that's annoying, doesn't childless lives count just as much?" but then...once you are a parent...the perspective totally changes.
Just don't watch the news. Too depressing.

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S.D.

answers from Dallas on

You are NOT nuts! You do, however, need to get your son into some activity where you can have adult interaction. I went through the same thing you are going through when my daughter was about 2-3. I would just sit and cry sometimes, worrying about what would happen to her if something would happen to me. I even went to my doctor and had him do a complete blood workup to make sure I didn't have any horrible diseases!! Instead of putting me on depression meds, he told me to first try getting more adult interaction. I put my daughter in dance and spent that hour talking in the waiting room with all the moms. They became my weekly therapy session! You just have to trust that God has everything handled and enjoy your beautiful son while he is a baby.They grow up fast!!

3 moms found this helpful

H.G.

answers from Dallas on

You aren't crazy. You love that child with your life and there's nothing on earth you wouldn't do for him. Of course sometimes it crosses my mind too but you can't live like that. I've learned you live life everyday and love the ones around like there's no tomorrow! Lifes too short. When you get a thought like that replace it with a thought of his smiling face! That's what I do and it helps!

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P.W.

answers from San Francisco on

I try not to. If you let yourself ponder it, you can be overwhelmed with grief daily. Try not to waste your time worrying or being sad; everything is probably going to be fine.

Some things just tear at your heart, though. When my kids were about 2 or 3, Susan Smith drowned her two little boys, and because they were about the same age as my kids, it devastated me.

Maybe you shouldn't watch the news, if it's going to take J. away from your little boy. Your being miserable isn't going to bring those other children back.

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M.R.

answers from Phoenix on

From the moment I started 'to 'show' with my first pregnancy, and even more so after giving birth and carrying this precious baby around, I felt more connected to humanity than I have ever felt in my life prior to that experience.

Becoming a mother instantly makes us aware of the profound blessings that a new life is and that we were the creators.

So tragic news about the loss of young children just seems now to me more tragic and I have less emotional ability to disconnect from the horror. Because what if it was me?

Also the natural disasters are much worse now than they were 10-20 years ago. When we heard about one then there seemed to be time to recover some or send money and feel like we helped. I'm not over the hurricane that hit New Orleans, the tsunami that hit the vacation island Christmas, 9-1-1, the Japanese earthquake and tsunami, the Slave Lake, Alberta fires, the forest fires, and floods and now the hurricane in Joplin, MO with the other hurricanes. It's seems endless.

Do you practice a faith? The bible tells us 365 times to 'Fear Not.' That's one for each day of the year. Enjoy your beautiful baby. Find peace and happiness too. Don't dwell on only the negative.

You are normal. Welcome to motherhood and humanity.

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B.M.

answers from Dallas on

i couldn't even read your whole question b/c it made me sad QUICK! i don't watch news b/c of this! seriously! my aunt has to call me when bad weather's coming b/c here, it's always 1.) apartment fire, 2.) ANOTHER young soldier killed in iraq/afghanistan, 3.) something horrible happening to a young child or infant. just can't stand it! so...i just watch my golden girls reruns & any reality tv show i can catch! out of touch??? yes. happy to not be SO sad & scared by how the world is??? yes. :)

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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

The news is incredibly depressing. My heart breaks for all these families that lose loved ones whether it be through natural disasters, or accidents, or worse. It has affected me more since I had kids, and I do think about losing them or them losing me every time I hear about someone else's loss. However, I try to remember that the news is based on tragedy. They choose to report the terrible things that happen in the world more than they choose the wonderful, uplifting, gratifying stories to tell. There are so many stories out there that are fantastic- and out of the thousands or more a day that happen, the media may choose to highlight ONE. Every day, people are given a second chance, children and babies find families who love them, and people are kind, generous, and helpful to each other. Catch up on important happenings online where you can choose to skip stories that are depressing and you don't need to read. Be thankful for what you have, and love your son. If your thoughts about death are making it hard to enjoy life, see a counselor and talk about it. Who knows how much time we have here- we should enjoy our lives, not spend it worrying about what might happen!

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D.R.

answers from New York on

i cant watch it either, it makes me cry. and when you have kids, especially when they are little and totally dependent on you, its incredibly scary. everything takes on a new meaning, for now and for their future. try not to watch it. and try to make a difference for good in this world, big or small, and let your kids see you and do it with you, if you make sure they live it, then you are making the world a better place, no? when you instill it in kids, you dont know where your influence ends....

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K.:.

answers from Phoenix on

Distraught over how sad the world is? No. I don't think anyone likes to see how ugly life can be. The reality is that lots of bad things happen in the world all the time. Knowing that anything can happen at any time should be motivation to be thankful for what we have, and a reminder to live a better, happier, more fulfilling life. IMO, thinking about death daily isn't healthy, nor is it something I choose to do. Do I think of it occasionally? Of course. But, since I can't control it, I choose not to let it be a constant source of stress & worry. Better to live your life than spend it thinking about death. That's no way to live.

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

You sound just like me when I was a young mom, I worried about something happening to my husband and I and having no one i would want to care for my kids. It's hard for me too i watch Nancy Grace and it just sickens me when I ear about missing children. God's timming is right, all's you can do S S is live your like right, pertect your kids and your family and pray, I used to worry, I still do my kids are 27, 24 and 22 and i still worry about the evils of this world. and no you are not nuts. J.

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

well, fortunately these cases are rare. We are extremely spoiled because, generally, we have a baby and get to see it grow up. In olden times, and not even that olden, just a hundred years ago, you would have 10 babies and maybe get to see 3-5 of them grow up if you were lucky.

You are dwelling on the bad. The Good Lord gave you your family and he wants you to enjoy them here and now. Being scared of death is only going to suck away at your current happiness, because death is going to come to everyone eventually. Your choice is how you spend the here and now.

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