I Think I've Created a Monster

Updated on November 01, 2006
J.J. asks from Hull, GA
7 answers

I've been reading some requests about getting kids to sleep in their cribs and everyone's got good advise so maybe someone can help me. My son is almost 22mo and we just moved into our new house in july. When we moved in he wasn't sleeping thru the night and I guess the stress of the move made it worse so I took the crib down and put up a full sized bed and now I'm stuck sleeping with him!! He won't even go to bed without me unless I rock him to sleep cross my fingers and lay him down with the sneakyness of a samurai ninja. When I tried that let him cry it out thing he would make himself throw up so that's why I just put the big bed up but now this is just getting old. I miss my husband and my bed but I dont know how to fix this monster I've created. Any advise would be greatly appreciated!!!!!

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So What Happened?

Thanks for the advise so far but there's just a few problems I may have left out. 1 is that we rock him to sleep(I know I know) and 2 is that initially he'll stay asleep but if i'm not there he wakes up 10 times a night.I've tried the technique Sara suggested maybe I didn't stick with it long enough or maybe it's bc he was still in his crib or maybe i'm just not doing it right I dunno. He never slep thru the night till I started sleeping with him either so I'm at a loss!

More Answers

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E.D.

answers from Asheville on

It sounds like you have quite a few issues to deal with! My advice is to look at different sleep books, like No Cry Sleep Solution, look into different plans, find one you like, then stick to it. You may have a few rough nights ahead of you, but the sooner you can fix this, the sooner you get some good nights. Just be consistent, whatever you decide.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from Dothan on

When I read you comment about the "sneakyness of a samurai ninja", I laughed so hard I almost cried. BOY DO I REMEMBER THOSE DAYS! I have a similar problem with our almost 5 year old. He has NEVER liked sleeping in his own bed. And I must confess, I love sleeping next to him, but it has gone on for way too long. He likes to "snuggle" and then throw his leg over me and go to sleep...lol! My hubby and I both work nights, I work Mon-Wed nights and hubby works Thur-Sat nights as well as a day job. So we truly value a chance to sleep in the same bed at the same time. And would like to do so without a softly snoring barrier between us..lol! With my sons rapidly approaching birthday we began to talk to him about the importance of sleeping in his own bed. About a month ago we told him that he could have one night a week to sleep with Mommy and one night with Daddy, but the rest of the week he has to sleep in his own bed. At least until his birthday, then he has to sleep in his own bed every night. I have had to sacrafice my pillow to him on the nights he sleeps in his bed to *snuggle* with so he doesn't feel so lonely and so he can throw his leg over it. I also tell him that I will check on him in ONE HOUR, and if he isn't asleep, then he can come into my room. Only once have has he NOT been asleep before the hour was up. Hubby has a bit more trouble with him on nights I work because he's a big old softie...lol! But so far so good and we have only one week to the big day. Wish us luck! And I hope some of this will help you, maybe give you a few ideas...

1 mom found this helpful
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S.

answers from Spartanburg on

well the monster can be tamed, but it is going to require some work on both you and he's part. It might help if you take the full size bed down and put up a toddler or twin bed, that way there is not room for you, and he might understand that. But if this is just his big boy bed, then he will need to get used to sleeping by himself. It is not that he needs you to be with him, it is that he has gotten used to you being there, and the comfort that brings him, and he is going to pitch a fit when you try to shake things up. you need to do it slowly and start by only laying with him for a few minutes maybe 10, and then shorten that each night by a couple minutes and take about a week to actually get to where you don't lay with him when he goes to bed, then sit beside the bed and maybe hold his hand or something but only for a couple of minutes, then work your way out the door. Use a chair and actually move it closer to the door each night until you are sitting outside the door for a couple minutes, This whole process may take 2-3 weeks, but if done gradually it will give him more time to get used to it knowing that you are still near by. Leaving them to cry themselves to sleep is great when they are fairly new born, but he has just developed a habit and you will have to break that habit. Good luck.

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T.C.

answers from Norfolk on

My husband is in the military, so every 6 days he has a duty day. This is basically a 24 hour shift. Well, in the last several months my daughter has been getting very hard to put down on his duty days. He has begun laying down with her at night and I won't do that. I have an infant to take care of too, not to mention I don't want her to start expecting us to lay in there with her. Well, on his last duty day, I was trying to put her down for the night for 3 hours. Finally I put some aftershave on one of his shirts and gave it to her. She fell asleep in about 20 minutes. Also, I know this works when they like to climb in your bed and it might work for you also. When you lay him down, lay down with him for 10 minutes and then leave. If he gets out of bed repeat this process. He should hopefully get the idea in about a week of doing this. You can also ask his doctor and see if they have any advice. I wish you the best of luck.

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E.N.

answers from Asheville on

hey, i had that same problem with my first son. what i did was get a twin bed and put in his room. i lay down with him until he fell asleep and then sneak out of the room. it worked. he got to the point where he loved his bed and would go get into it all by himself, of course he was like 2 1/2 when that happened. i hope you find a solution.

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N.R.

answers from Columbia on

J.,
I had a similar problem with my son, he's now 14, and gladly sleeps alone. My problem was he got used to me there, so I created another "me". I got an electric blanket, and a teady bear with a heart beat, the electric blanket mimics your body heat, and the teady bear has a heart beat to mimic your own,(they used to sell them in the baby dept. at walmart)wrap the bear in the blanket, (Not your son, he can get overheated.)and put it beside him. Hopefully that will work.
N.

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A.L.

answers from Richmond on

I'm in the same boat!

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