Honeymoons

Updated on February 14, 2012
M.B. asks from Occoquan, VA
13 answers

We never had one. We also have never had a trip to ourselves of any kind at all. Not before marriage, not before kids... not after marriage. We are very happy in our marriage of about 10 ten years- very happy, but a trip would be nice... one day. Main reason is no extra money. We have always found a much better and useful place to put our money- but I'm thinking a trip, even if just for a couple days, would be nice...

Anyone else never had a honeymoon or anything like that?

(this all started when a mom came up to me today and was so excited about her weekend trip with her husband, and said to me "we haven't done this in 5 months!!!") I was genuinely excited for her. I mean, you could see the happiness just pouring from her, it made me smile and happy as well. But, I was thinking to myself: gosh, we haven't done that... ever! LOL! :)

What can I do next?

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

We didn't have a honeymoon. After about 10 years of marriage we had a week in Hawaii. AWESOME :) I'd love to do it again, but who knows when it'll happen :)

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A.C.

answers from Savannah on

When we were married, we didn't have much money (Jer had FINALLY left his yuck job and gotten a good one 3 months before, but had a lot of debt and was "just starting out".....I had some debt, and had to leave my good job to get married and move to TX). We had a great, cool wedding that was relatively inexpensive (we shopped timing and other stuff). So our wedding was fun and a little trip: we stayed in Vegas, treated everyone to flights, hotels, a big dinner together, a comedy show, breakfast the next day, helicopters into the Grand Canyon for our ceremony, and a reception at the Venetian with dinner, dancing, and a photo tour of the city in a stretch limo, BUT we left the morning after and went back to his 1 bedroom apartment and moved my stuff in, and he went back to work the next day. It was like, he took off work on Friday to go to Vegas, we got married on Saturday, came back and moved me in on Sunday, and he was at work on Monday. Yipes!
We were pregnant 6 weeks later, so we didn't really get to travel a lot or anything. We got a last minute B&B that usually doesn't allow children, but they did make an exception for us since it was the holidays and noone was there, so we had a special weekend....with an infant though, lol. We took vacations (a month in the UK, little trips to visit my mom in New Orleans or my grandpa in AL so we could take our toddler to the beach, etc....but no "honeymoon").
When our oldest son was 3 and our youngest was 7 months old, my husband won a trip to Naples, Fla with travel, stay at the Ritz, and all our meals and activities paid for, something he earned from work. So we finally got our honeymoon, a little over 4 years after we got married. My bff and my mom took turns watching/playing with our boys. We had SO MUCH FUN! It was wonderful to just sit back and play---all grown up stuff like parasailing, airboating, kayaking, etc. Stuff we couldn't do with an infant on our laps...or long, lingering dinners with adult conversation without worrying in the back of my mind about hurrying up before my 3 year old is "over it" and starts acting out. Late night walks on the beach, nice stuff!
We do have dates regularly (we learned the hard way that those things are necessary and nothing is "better" or "more useful" than a strong marriage). It's important to stay connected. While we take family vacations, it's been almost 2 years since that "honeymoon" trip, and I'd love to go on another---just a little weekend thing sometime this summer. The kids are young and we're not stressing out about it, but we do have a little wishlist of things we'd like to do together; Costa Rica is where we both really want to go the next time we can do 5-7 day trip.

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

oh, all these stories are breaking my heart! you MUST take some one-on-one time with your spouse, your mate, your lover, your partner! there is no 'better or more useful place' to spend your resources than on your life relationship! if you have no money, get your parents to take your kids for a weekend and have an in-home belated honeymoon. bubble baths. nekkid massage sessions. chocolate covered strawberries. champagne. heart-to-heart sharing. lots of laughter.
make it happen!
khairete
S.

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J.K.

answers from Kansas City on

We never had a honeymoon either!! In fact, we probably waited until we were married for 15 years, before we actually had a "real" vacation, which was weekend only. We ended up going to the lake, and loving it, and we started going on extra long weekends with the kids. Then we couldn't stop going!! And this year, after 21 years of marriage,we went on our first "real big" vacation, and went to Florida for a week. It was great. And don't get me wrong, we have been places. We have travelled to see family in different states, and had a great time, and I loved it but never considered it a vacation. Hope you get one soon, it puts a whole new perspective on life. Our reason for not going before = time.

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

Gosh this is so sad. Yes, we had a honeymoon. Spent a week in Destin, FL because that was all we could afford. We drove there from Texas and stayed in a condo.

For our 15 year anniversary/my graduating from college we spent 10 days in Napa/San Francisco (hubs and I only). We have done several trips with my husband's company, conventions and such. For my 40th b-day we met the family in Orlando for week. For hub's 50th birthday, I surprised him and we went to London and Paris for a week no kids invited!

We also took the kids to Myrtle Beach and Hilton Head. We would come back to Texas once a year during the summer to visit family for a week. We always drove and stayed with family. We have a time share so that helps with costs. Staying in a condo reduces food costs as well.

We felt it was very important as a family to get away and spend one on one time with each other. My husband and I also feel its important for us to stay connected as well. Happy parents make a happy family!

We are hoping to go back to London in either May or September. Just depends on $$$$$. :( I LOVE to travel!!!

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

I am not planning on being able to take a honeymoon, maybe a night in a hotel two if we are lucky - honestly, I rather take a vacation by myself or with my gal pals we are all scattered across the country now a days and well, I see him every day! We tend to take vacations alone vs together and a lot of the time my son comes along too.

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S.H.

answers from Huntsville on

We didn't have a honeymoon either. No "real" wedding either - went to courthouse!

We haven't really been on any trips just the 2 of us. Always because we don't have the money - or like you said, we find better uses for the money. We did get to go stay a couple nights at Blackberry Farm in Tennesee - but my company paid! So, it wasn't just the 2 of us, it was us + my coworkers & their SO's - 40 to 50 people or so! :) But it was still nice!!! We are talking about maybe staying a couple nights somewhere just the 2 of us between hubby's college semesters. Our anniversary is in a couple weeks but we've got so much going on we can't go on a trip yet.

Maybe you can plan a weekend trip too! Doesn't have to be real fancy. Maybe find somewhere that has free / cheap things you can do & stay in a hotel. It's always fun to get away :)

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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Nope, never had one.

F.H.

answers from Phoenix on

My first marriage was in 1998 in So Cal when the huge storm "El Nino" hit. We had 7 inches of rain on our wedding day. So when we heard the storm was coming around when we married (on Valentines day, I don't suggest THAT to anyone!) we cancelled our HI plans and decided to drive to Rosarito Beach in Mexico. It was "ok" but everything was washed out, including the beach.

My new husband and I have been married for just over 2 years. We didn't really have a "honeymoon" but did get married on the riverboat in Laughlin, NV. So it was over 4 days and friends and family joined us. Not our ideal honeymoon, but we did have a fun time.

My husband is in sales and is one of the top 10 agents in AZ so he qualifies for company paid trips, usually at least one per year, last year we went to Puerto Vallarta and Vegas. We literally don't have to pay for anything, they even give you cash for souveniers. But, you are with others he works with that qualified for the trip too!!!! But we don't complain, its great that he gets to go.

We also try to get away for weekends when we can. Its not that hard to just save up $20 here and there and you can get a hotel for Fri and Sat night and just do some fun things around town. I hope you can find a way to do this, its kind of sad you guys haven't done anything. Life is too short...good luck!!!

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D.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

We really haven't either. And from the other responses, we are not alone... LOL!
Depending on what you want to do, there are options.
If you want to just get away and stay in a Hotel, you can try using priceline.com and find a nicer place for less money. Start bidding real low and see what you can get. My sister use to do that all the time.
If you want to bring family, there is always camping, Renting an RV, renting a cabin near a lake.
Look for cheaper airfares using Southwest or Jetblue, depending on your local airports.
Good luck and I hope you are able to do something and have a great time!!

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J.V.

answers from Chicago on

You bet. We never went anywhere when we got married, and the plan was to go to Italy on our 10th. Last year was our 10th. We did a groupon to a hotel in the city and had about 24 hours to ourselves! I did have a 1 year old at home, so going away for an extended period of time just wasn't realistic.

A close friend is getting married in the Bay area in May. We are going away with no kids for 4 nights. It is going to cost us a small fortune, but when I tried to back out, hubby said "no, we are doing this no matter what. Make it work." So I got creative, found a cheap VRBO condo, and convinced my brother to gift me a BOGO airpline coupon.

In general, I have more important things to spend my money on than time away with hubby. (we do do in-home date night on Fridays --nice dinner, long conversations, a movie.) I also like having the kids around, and I always feel a bit lost when I am away from them for an extended period of time. They are still so small (almost 4 and 2).

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C.W.

answers from Santa Barbara on

We had to practice honeymooning for five years before we did it for real!! Travel is just not optional for me.

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

I just saw this and well, we have travelled BUT it has always been to see my husband's family or when my son returned from overseas. Ah, what I wouldn't give to go on a honey moon or romantic vacation. My husband's family has always been kind, letting us sleep in a bed or when we have travelled to other family visits we usually sleep on the floor. I am starting to get where that hurts my back. so, I too keep wishing and telling my husband we need to do this. He seems perfectly happy at home most of the time. Perhaps I should just go by myself!! haha

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