Help with an Eight Year Old

Hi there. I too, have an 8 yr old son soon to be 9 in September. He acts younger for his age also. Not to mention how sensitive he is whenever he can't have his way. He was my firstborn and third pregnancy. I lost the first two pregnancies before God blessed me with him. He was diagnosed with ADHD in Kindergarten even though I suspected he had it when he went to pre-k. He had to repeat kindergarten also. Like your son, my son picks his times he wants to eat everything he feasts his eyes on and then days where he is very picky and won't eat what I offer him. I have four kids and my youngest two a boy and a girl are only 11 months apart. Right now, they are giving me the most trouble. I have days where I am so stressed out I just want to bust out crying, but I don't want my kids to see that. I am a stay at home mom and my husband works full time. It is hard to get time by myself. I just pray to god for strength and guidance. I hope things get better for you.

Hello D., well first of all, and I don't won't to be ugly but you have to stop babying him! I know you don't think you do or maybe you don't alot but sometimes but you have to set the rules with consequences and if he doesn't mind them then he must be punished and if you let him get away with it once then your in for a fight! Children know so much now and they know how to manipulate people and especially the one that is with them all the time! If he doesn't want to eat what you made then don't force him because any Dr. will tell you that he will eat when he is hungry and he will not starve! I know how mean I sound and I'm sorry I don't mean to but you have to decide what is best for him and then make sure he realizes your the mother and the boss not him! he will through a big fit to start with but then you will see that it gets so much easier after only a few days and want that make your life alot easier in the long run! Good Luck and again sorry I seem so mean and hard! D.

Hi D.. I have three daughters. One who is seven years old. I can relate to what you are saying. I recently read an article in Parents magazine about a stage they go through at this age. It said they are testing their limits and will see how much they can get away with. They want to know that they have defined boundaries. If I can put my hands on the article I could send more advice later. I think alot of whining is done for attention because they know that annoys you. Maybe if you told him you will not respond until he can speak normally without whining. My 7 year old surprises me everyday. I feel like I have to remind her of her age. She is very intelligent, but at times acts like a baby. I believe what he is going through is totally normal. Are you in Cornersville or Lewisburg area? E-mail me and let me know. I stay at home with three daughters and maybe we could get together. R. Mckee

Hi D., I have a 12 year old boy that whines!!! He too is small he is about 4'8 and weighs 68 lbs. He will eat and eat, and then we have to beg him to eat. He whines when it is convienant for him, like at home. He plays sports and has gotten banged up but he did not put on a show like he does with us. Maybe that is what your son is doing also. He will be fine.

D.,
I understand where you are coming from. I have a 7 year old daughter that will cry if you look at her wrong. It is SO embarrassing when even her friends tell her to stop crying. I can assume it is a phase and will pass on its own. In the mean time tie a knot and hang on!!! The best advice I can give is if you think it's beyond a normal stage ask the peditrition if they think there might be an underlying cause. Keep us posted and let us know what happens.

I have an eight year old son that is sometimes whines and gets very emotional. I think it's normal for kids this age to have trouble dealing with their emotions. If you just keep setting his bounderies, he will be fine. It really helps with my son to have talks with him a few nights a week. I ask him how he's feeling and if there is anything he is upset about, then we just talk about anything we want after that. It helps him to understand that he can come to me when he is upset, but also that it needs to be in an appropriate way and time.

I also wanted to add that giving him time with other kids will help him emotionally. When the other kids won't stand for his whining, he will learn really quick how he should behave around them. Don't worry; he'll be fine.