HELP! I'm Stuck!

Start over in town. It will help hopefully. But I'm a little confused. Why can't you find a job in town. How will living in a rental help you find a job? How big is this town and have you thought about starting where so many do, in fast food? It's not glamorous. But one nice thing about being older in fast food is they fast track you to management.

I vote start over. If your husband has a job there and he likes it and it looks pretty stable, I'd sell everything and start over. Can't be any worse than living the hell you're living now can it?

Look at it like this...it's never too late to start all over again.

I also want you to take into consideration that you have more than allot of people in this horrible economy, you have choices. Allot of us don't. We live the best way we can without the options. Find some peace in that.

I had someone tell me once that maybe I am praying for the wrong thing. That maybe I'm asking all the wrong questions. Maybe what you need to pray for is not the good job, but peace in knowing you are blessed to have a loving husband, healthy children and a roof over your head...maybe then the good fortune will come rolling in.

Sending good thoughts your way.

Look into Jet Blue, AAA, or Juice Plus - for a stay at home job.

Life is h*** o* alot of people right now, try harder to get a job that you can do at home.
Hang on tight, things will get better.

Take real good care of your husband, it sounds like he might be under alot of stress right now.

I will pray for you and your family.

Sell and GET OUT. We are in a very similar situation. We are selling our house (there is a looooot of stuff wrong with it that was not disclosed) and already know we won't make any money. But we will be out of a bad situation, can rent closer to town and will be ready to move as soon as I am done with night school.
Girl, I have been in your shoes and am in fact still walking in them. The only thing I can say is dump the giant weight of your mortgage and go back to renting for a while.

Maybe consider:

1.) homeschooling. Can be done easily if you follow the advice and curriculum in the book The Well Trained Mind. You should read it anyways, I'll bet you'll salivate to homeschool if you read it. Anyways, that solves the school problem.

2.) open an in-home child care center. Ask your family for a little help with getting started and getting your house up to code, getting all of the equipment (baby proofing again/nap mats etc..) Look up the licensing requirements for your state online. I know that in VA you don't have to be licensed if you have 5 or less kids at a time, but you can be "voluntarily registered" which is a little less rigid. You can charge anywhere up to $250 a week per kid (depending on your experience and training with children). It can be a great supplemental income and will work out well logistically with homeschooling. If you are near any kind of military base, consider accepting shift work kids. This way, they're asleep for most of the time and so are you! :)

3) consider getting "crafty" on the side. Is there anything craftwise that you do really well? I personally can't knit to save my life, but I crochet beautifully and sew passably (as long as it's a forgiving fabric! lol!). I know that with a little extra work I could turn a tidy little profit at craft fairs every so often to add to the family income.

4) Think about growing/canning/pickling your own veggies and drying your own fruit. This can add up to a huge savings over time, but it's a LOT of work and is only for the dedicated saver that also happens to love gardening.

5) budget, hard.....

Well, that's all I can think of that would fit well with your situation, but I'm sure you'll get TONS of great ideas...I can't wait to read more of them.

have you tried signing on with a staffing agency? You could get temp work, which could lead to permanent, or just temp for awhile to gain experience for your resume. I got my current job through a staffing agency after signing up with 3. I highly recommend it.

I live in Gilbert, AZ and this what I would do if I had your problem. I would find a retail or secretarial job (maybe a temp agency) in the metropolitan area... look closest to your family first. Then bit the bullet and rent out your home. Good renters are out there... few and far between I know... but they are there. Find a reasonably priced rental close to your new job so you don't blow all your income on gas. I am assuming you will have the support of your family for watching the kiddos during the summer and after school. I know it's a balancing act between the cost of child care vs. the income you will make. I think that once you begin working... even in a not-perfect job for the most money...you will begin to feel your self-worth coming back and will start to feel more positive and optomistic. That may be the thing you need most right now. Good luck. This economy will turn around so take heart and don't let the heat get you down.
:)
Another thing you might try, because it is a service I know I would pay for. You could go to your sons school and let the administration know that your home is available for other kids after school. I suppose this may not work best if you're driving your son to school too far away. but if you move closer to town and are walking distance from the school. I would be so happy to find a home my boys could go to after school one or two days a week. And if you help the kids with their homework too!! Wow I'd pay big time. And you'd only need a few kids to make it worth your while.
This could work in tandem with a part time job. hmmm

I think that you have had to deal with some unfortunate situations for quite a while and you have become almost too paralyzed to find a job. If you are living in a semi-retired town, think of things or services that retirees would like to have done for them. What about having a house cleaning service or an errand service for those seniors? What kind of jobs do other people do in your area? Can you do childcare in your home for some of your neighbors? Are other parents driving their kids to that other school? Maybe you could get paid for transporting the other kids too? What kind of job skills do you have? could you transfer those skills to another type of position?
If I was in your position, I would make a list of all the things I am good at, all the skills I have and all the contributions I could make to a business. I would listen to positive tapes and read positive books (you can find them at the library) to psyche myself up to go find a job. In a tough economy it if very hard to find a job if you come across as beaten down and I am picking that up in your letter, so it may come across when you talk to people.
Good luck with your job search.

I also recommend sell. We just lost everything a little more then a year, my husband also lost his job.
It was very hard but now I look back, there is not better time for rent then now.
Because we don't own a home we all can move to where ever my husband gets job, you can always leave with your parents if things gets really bad and share the bills.
Some times you have to take a step back so you can go farther, like when you trow a ball, have you try trowing a ball without pushing your hand back first?
Don't worry, changes are scary but not always bad, hold on and I agree with the other mom, now is time to show your love to each other to keep you guys as a unit.

i honestly can't give you any advice, but i will say just keep on praying and keeping looking, if it were me i would move closer. you never know what you may stumble across and you may not have to start with nothing. or maybe start hoeschooling( if you can tolereate it) to ease the burden of having to drive so far away. but i know you might want your son to have friends.so that's just a suggestion. i hope whatever you choose to do it works out for you. you are in my prayers and lgood luck.

Sorry to hear about your situation. That is a horrible feeling to be stuck. Sometimes God is trying to answer our prayers but we are stubborn and won't listen. It sounds like he's telling you to move but you are resisting. Take a step or two back and try to view your situation from the outside in: what if a friend of yours was in the exact situation, what would you advice? It doesn't make sense to me to be stuck to a house if it's making your life so difficult, even miserable, in so many ways.

If you could sell and at least not still owe on your house AND get something in a better area for you that you could afford on your husbands income that would probably be your best bet. Then, continue looking for work yourself too. Your options 2-4 didn't sound too good...4 did but if you can't afford it you will be better off being near family.

Have you tried any work at home options? I recently started supplementing my income from home. Let me know if you want more info.

We ended up having our home foreclosed upon after my husband was laid off. Ultimately, it hasn't been as bad as I thought it would be. Starting over with nothing sounds scary, but think of it this way: you are also free of this huge burden you've been carrying around. If you sell your house and break even, great. Now you can move into a less expensive place (either owning or renting) - maybe one closer to your son's school or your husband's job. Maybe if your living expenses go down, you won't HAVE to return to work. Or you could work part-time. You have more options when you're not house-poor, struggling to make every month's mortgage payment. Just my two cents!

I just wanted to suggest a Dave Ramsay book to you. Get it free from the library. Either Financial Peace or Total Money Makeover.
It's easier for you to make decisions about life when it feels like the wolf is at your door.
What about your vehicles? If you have two vehicles and two car payments that total a lot of $$$ per month, then you need to sell and downgrade them asap.
Good luck...and remember...when you pray--BE SPECIFIC! Then listen.

I'm sorry to hear you're family is haveing a hard time right now. I say go with your gut. What does your husband do? Can he do his type of work where you moved her from? Would you be able to find work back there? Try looking at classified job ads for your types of job in the city you're considering to move to. Have you considered finding a job you can do from home so you don't have child care expenses (you don't mention the age of your son). Or a part-time job near your son's school you could work while he's in school. I have a regular full-time job but I also have another job I do part-time from home. It's a legitamate job that has an unlimited income potential. I would be glad to share the details with you if you're interested. There are people who start with this company with less to their names than you have and make a good living and turn their lives around. I wish you the best. I've glanced at the resonses you've received and you've got some great suggestions. Keep your chin up. :-)