Help! - North Olmsted,OH

I have to disagree with the person who said Zeke's father wouldn't let his mom hurt his son, because he obviously doesn't see a problem with his mother in the first place, even though she was abusive to the other kids. If he grew up with her, then he doesn't know what's appropriate and what's not. So I wouldn't trust his judgement on that.
That's a difficult situation, though! I would definitely talk to him, and if he gets mad and stays away then that is his choice. You cannot "walk on eggshells" all your life worrying that he will pull out of your son's life if you cross him at all. You know? not saying go out of your way to make him mad, or not work on the relationship, but just if something needs to be said you need to say it. Technically, he has no right to take Zeke at all without your permission, right? And he certainly needs to respect your wishes, legally, just as any babysitter etc. would. Yes, he is Zeke's father, I am just saying that you have a right to determine where your son goes. I would have a calm discussion with him, not getting mad or accusing him or anything, just saying "look, I know you went to your mom's and you know that I don't want Zeke there...we are talking about Zeke's health and safety here and I cannot stand for putting him in danger. Why did you go behind my back like that? If you can't respect my desire to protect my own son, what do you think a rational person would do about that? Keep you from taking him out of the house? I really don't want to do that but I don't know what to do, I want you to be able to see your son but I also need to trust you." etc.
Maybe his mom still has a lot of control over him and he's afraid to go against her?
If you were married it would be a different story. Then it would be really hard...but at the same time, someone else could be abusive to your son at some point in the future that you are unaware of. What if you werent' there the day she abused her granddaughter? (scary thought, you'd still be bringing Zeke over there).
I don't know if you are a praying person, but ultimately all you can do is put Zeke into God's hands and trust that it will all work out for his good, no matter what, in the end. Make sense? We can't control everything, unfortunately. Do what you can, and trust the rest to God.
I dont' that I am right about all this, just my thoughts. Hope it helps!?
Blessings,
Lynn

I can tell you what I would do.... If I didn't feel that I could talk to him reasonable, I would talk to an attorney about getting supervised visitation for either my husband or my MIL. I know it will be expensive and cause a problem but you can't mess with kids! GOOD LUCK!!!!!

ok hi its me again! you need to sit your husban dow and tell him that he nneds to respect your wishes. you two cant disagree! i dont hink i would go as far as not letting you husban see your son but maybe not letting him take your son when he is going that way is something your going to have to do. at the same time maybe its not to bad to let your mother in law see him when supervised. i dont think your husban would let her hurt him. but its all up to you! good luck!!

I dont think you should ban him from seeing his son. It is very important that you stress him not taking the baby to his mothers though! If he gets mad and doesnt want to see him thats his choice then. At least hes the one making the decision. But the way his mom is he shouldnt ever go behind your back. granted hes his dad but your his mom. That means so much more in my eyes. He really should respect your wishes. I would definatly say something to him!

personally, if you agreed that he shouldn't go there, then he shouldn't have done so. By letting it go you are putting your son in danger and letting your husband walk all over you. I would put your foot down and let you husband have his temper tantrum. Do what you need to do to protect your son. You wouldn't let your husband drive your son around without being in a car seat. So how is him taking your son to a place you agreed he shouldn't go, that is dangerous, any different?