DD Getting All Freaked Out About Bees and Spiders

Updated on August 21, 2012
K.B. asks from Detroit, MI
6 answers

My daughter just turned 5 a couple of weeks ago. Over the past 6 months to a year or so, she is getting more fearful of spiders and bees. It started out as getting upset if she spotted a spider in her room or anywhere else in the house and of course we would have to capture and dispose of it. Now she gasps and screams if she happens to see a spider anywhere that happens to be near her. Today she wanted to play outside with her bike and scooter but then they are in the garage and there happened to be a web near them and a daddy longlegs near by and she changed her mind about riding either one.

She also gets scared if there are any bees in the area. She's never been stung herself but unfortunately a friend of hers happened to get stung outside when she was over at our house. We were at an outdoor b-day party yesterday and it didn't help that there happened to be bees hovering around the food. All I heard all day long as "Mom! There's a bee! I don't like bees! There's another bee! Make it go away!"

I've never gotten freaked out by bugs myself so I am not sure where all this is coming from. I've always been very calm and matter-of-fact, and told DD that it's not going to hurt her if she just leaves it alone. I've told her over and over that the more she starts freaking out and yelling and waving her arms around, the more likely she's going to get stung. Interestingly, when the bee stung her friend, they both spotted it first - DD kept still and quiet like I've told her, her friend started flailing and crying, and guess who got stung? And DD seems to understand that, but she is still getting upset at the sight of a bee or a spider. She is also ok with all other bugs, if she knows they can't hurt her. She will try to catch butterflies and ladybugs all day long and the other day found a leaf bug that she let crawl all over her without a problem. I've even read her Charlotte's Web, which she enjoyed, and explained how spiders have a very important job, but she still thinks spiders are the work of the devil.

Any ideas on how to help get her over her fears? This is getting old - especially when she didn't want to ride her bike because it happened to have a spider near it, or says she doesn't want to sleep in her room because maybe there's a spider in it, or has to point out and gasp in horror at every spider web we come across. TIA!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

I would go to the library and get as many books and educational videos about bees and spiders as you can. We tend to be less afraid of things that we know a lot about, and maybe exposure through videos and books will desensitize her to them.

4 moms found this helpful

F.M.

answers from San Antonio on

I like Sherri's thought. (Bill Nye the Science Guy!) We have tons of Daddy Longlegs here where I live. Can you let your daugher see one crawl on you? They tickle actually. Daddy Longlegs are so fragile. I have about 3 in my shower at any given moment. One wish of the water and they're drowned. Plus, Most spiders will run away from you, not run near you. Remind her of that.

Bees - no advice there. I'd say the same thing you are saying about stay still, walk away, very simple.

1 mom found this helpful

S.L.

answers from New York on

My son, (who previously loved insects!) got freaked out after seeing and being bit by some large horseflies. I bought him some citronella bracelets at Bed Bath and Beyond, (cheap) promised him they would not bite him. and he's happy as a clam now. Can you take her to an insect museum, or nature center? Watch the Cat in the Hat knows a lot about That when they visit a bee hive and see how they make honey.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.F.

answers from Boston on

I feel the same way as she does....I do not like either and will go inside.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.R.

answers from El Paso on

Next time you come across a spider, catch it in a glass or jar and let/have her look at it through the glass. This would probably work best if it's a "furry" spider, that way it looks kind of cute. :) The little jumping spiders are my favorite! I don't know what to do about the bees, though.

J.S.

answers from Jacksonville on

Well, my dad just spent a week in the hospital because he was bitten by a black widow. So really, I'm not much help. Since then I've squished every spider that dares come through my door. :)

Try the odds game. Tell you the odds of actually getting stung is 1 million to one, that they rarely sting. Maybe that will comfort her.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions