Bored in the City

I understand about the country i grew up 3/4 miles off the county road and about 14 miles from the town i graduated from high school. 13 is a hard age is there a y he could go to, how about the library does he have a computer any after school activities that might interest him.
paula

Does he have any activities that he participates in? If not, I would involve him in something once a week. That will give him something to look forward to and possibly give him something to do up to the activity (practice sport, chess, whatever is of interest to him). Help him identify things to do that he enjoys (reading, painting, cards, games, exercise - all can be done at home).

Hi J.-

I noticed you're in Grants Pass. Me too! Anyway, I'm not dealing with teens yet, but I know a lot of other kids do really well being involved with a youth group. Many of the churches in our area have great youth groups that keep the kids busy with lots of activities...not to mention it's a good way to get them connected with other teens of a similar faith. I see that you're involved in a church already, so maybe that's a place where he can get involved a little more. Otherwise, I know a lot of the larger churches have wonderful youth programs and they're open to teens who don't necessarily go to church there. Just a thought!

-J.

J.,

Depending on your neighborhood, how safe, how much traffic,etc. I suggest two things:

Get him a bike...he can ride and explore, he is old enough, in my opinion, and he will have fun!

City sports leagues...always fun, lots of choices...(swimming,tennis,golf,baseball,football,basketball,karate,boxing,soccer) and he will make tons of new friends!

I grew up in a big city and I had lots of fun riding my bike and rollerskates all around...it was a blast...oh the freedom. I also played on a sports team of some kind or another during the summertime and made lots of friends.

K.

I would figure out what he is interested in- what hobbies or things he might like to persue.
Music lessons, art lessons, martial arts etc. something that he could do and then practice at home - the physical aspects of it will help to keep the boredom away and then possibly inspire him to other things.

Something to go along with this would be some kind of project- does he like to build, create or fix things? Get him involved in some projects where he can create something and take pride in his accomplishments - whether is be one of those robot building kits, kinex or something like it, model cars, etc.

Encourage him to get involved in a community service project. Is there a need in your community that he could fill? For example, my daughter had a paper route for a little while- she noticed tat several of her customers were elderly people who were alone a lot and really enjoyed havign her company. She does not deliver the paper any more but she often plans a "coookie day" she will bake several batches of cookies and go around to visit several of her previous customers- now she is also organizing a backpacks for foster kids program where she is collecting backpacks and personal items for foster children.
Are you in an area where he can go and visit with people that just might need a visitor. Is there a nursing home in the area, or soem other place where there may be a need for 'personal connection' that he can visit and give his time and talents to?

Is a small job an option? He is to young to have a regular job but there are still small stores and places where youth can go and earn a couple of dollars here and there for sweeping out the store, cleaning windows, taking care of some minor lanscaping needs- he can do odd jobs for neighbors. This might open doors for other things to help alleviate boredom and for a kid, earning their own pocket money is always a huge plus and gives a sense of accomplishment.

I know summer is coming - we live in the suburbs but my kids still have their times of boredom. At the beginning of the summer I let them choose something that they are interested in that they might not have the opportunity to learn about in school- something that relates to the field of work they might want to be involved in or a skill they might want to learn to do or a hobby they want to develop and increase in skill in. They are required to spend so much time a week on it and show some work and progress on a project, report, craft or whatever they are working on at the end of each week- We try to stetch it out over the summer or for smaller projects do one a month or two over the course of the summer- it gives them something to do and work on when there is nothing else to do and there is a sense of accomplishment. There are goals for them to meet and it is productive. There are times when they don't feel like doing it but once they get started they get involved and the time flies.

I hope this helps!
God bless you and your son!

I grew up in GP too! I used to belong to the GP Aquatic Club that met at Caveman Pool. My parents had me adn my brotehr ride our bikes there at 6am for practices...yes, 6am. I remember many summer mornings spent watching the world wake up en route to the pool. I don't know whereabouts you live (maybe too far outta town) but this is a good thing to burn off energy, keep him active, and keep him occupied (you as well) going to swim meets. We would carpool with someone for the out of town meets, so my parents did not have to drive, which made it easier for them as they both worked weekends and every day.

J.,
I hear you...all my daughter wants to do is play outside, but with no yard to play in, that can sometimes be difficult. Granted she is a lot younger than your son, we just go for lots of walks, especially to parks that are scenic, and some have play equipment. Or we will play at others' homes that do have yards or areas to play in. Some other things he might consider doing as he is older is getting involved with other children in your community or church, sports, youth groups, or other extra-curicular type activities. If he is enrolled in public school, there are often many activities for students outside of school hours, and some even have activities through the summer. Parks and Recreation often have listings of activities/events for kids/families. If there is currently no youth groups at your church, maybe you guys could help to start one. Hopefully this helps some, I know it can be difficult to be surrounded by concrete.

K.

I work for a small publishing company. I'm not sure where you're located, but we publish a book called "Discover Washington with Kids." It's got activities in it that are totally age appropriate for your son, and they're all over Washington, with sections on Seattle, outside Seattle, Tacoma and all major areas of the state. It should be at your local library, but if not, you can get it at your local bookstore or amazon.com

Hi J.,
You did not say what city you lived in or I could be more specific. Look in to your cities Community Centers, Boys and Girl clubs and YMCA. Just for starters, these orginizations have many programs for kids, plus sports and activites. Also, look into your neighborhood church they usually always have youth programs. Does he have neighborhood friends? Have him invite a friend over to hang out with a couple times a week.
Good luck, I think sometimes no matter what you do kids will say they are bored :) But helping them find things to do will get them moving to start finding things for themselves to do.

Your son may be old enough to volunteer. Around here, teens can help out at the High Desert Museum and Humane Society. The volunteer programs are supervised and well-organized. The teens meet other young people while working, and they are getting good work experience and references to help them when they start looking for a paying job.

If the child in question is the 13 year old in the "about me" section then you have some good options. I would look into the boys and girls club in your area. That is an excellent way for your child to do after school stuff while supervised. You might plan some sleep overs with friends and do "parties" for your son. Work with his hobbies and create fun things to do that utilize his interests. My kids are into computers and gaming, skateboarding and riding quads. We plan for them to have a few options on hand and always have books. If all else fails, tell him to find something to do or you will put him to work...they usually find something quickly. lol

I don't know what part of the city you live by or in, but we are always looking for new people to help in our area cause of the bad economy and so forth.......
My husband and my daughter who is 17 now, we go up to the riding place in reiter,in goldbar, and olympia, and ride quads, we a few extras that we can get from ones that don't ride much, but its alot of fun, and always willing to teach.
Its gods country and we love it, if interested, e-mail,
____@____.com

Hi J.,

The good thing about a city is the intellectual opportunities and the organized activities that are stimulating and challenging. These are also needed to keep your child striving, finding talents and interests that he holds, and help him find fulfillment, even as a teenager. I grew up in a small fishing town, and my mom never helped me develop in those ways, and I had a lot of aimless wasted years because of it. I wish she would have even just gotten me in a chess club. I also drank a lot as a teenager, out of boredom.

Anyway so I admire that you are looking for things to help your son out, and it's good he's talking with you about it!

I looked online and saw that there is a Roots and Shoots group in Grants Pass. It says all ages. Your son might be one of the older ones, but that is good for him too.

Best wishes,

Get him active in planning his summer long activities--coumputer research, church, pastor help-working for someone making money (every kid wants to do that).

This can be one long summer thing or more than one. It can be a series with coming home for a week between each or some variation. This will be a summer of growing up for him and you really want it to be activities that you approve of.

It sounds as if you are involved in your church. When my son was thirteen it was the year he found out that he truly wanted to be a member of my church. It can be an important year for him and you together.

I also grew up poor and in the country. I helped in the house. My brothers, outside. In those days housework was considered "woman's work." My brothers should have done some housework. They're in their 40's and 50's and are terrible housekeepers. I know that housekeeping isn't considered fun by many people but I learned to like it. I felt really good to have finished something.

I also read and read. I finished a book a night for awhile in junior high. He could find ideas for activities in books and on the Internet.

He could have projects, such as refinishing a piece of furniture, washing the windows, of course keeping his room reasonably neat. However, I do believe that a kid's room is their room and they can be sloppy as long as it isn't a danger to "public health."

At around that age I collected stamps. I ordered large envelopes of stamps and went thru them looking for specific ones shown in a book. The book was like a current day stamp book in that you glued the stamp over the picture. I think you could find both book and stamps at a hobby store or over the Internet. Stamp collecting was really inexpensive in my day.

There are other hobbies he could pursue at home. My brothers used their allowance to build model planes. My cousins built a very basic radio system. Again inexpensive. My brothers also worked with leather. It is more expensive but not too bad. At least back then.
Wood carving is another hobby. Your local hobby store could help him get started.

I know Grants Pass from my childhood. Is it now not safe for kids to ride their bikes around the neighborhood, to a friends house or to the library, etc?

I would think that Grants Pass is large enough to have a kid's club of some sort where kids can play basketball, swim, box and other activities while supervised by adults. How about Big Brothers?

Our family was active in church and all of us kids were in a youth group. There is 4H with projectgs for city kids. A Boys Scouts group that is for older kids and has a different name.

He could learn a skill or just have fun thru Parks and Recreation classes. At least I think Grants Pass would also have an organization of that type.

Does he go to friends' homes and/or have his friends come to your house? This is an opportunity for the boys to be creative in finding a way to entertain themselves. Of course, parents must know and approve what they are doing. :):):

By the way, all kids this age are bored even when they're involved in activities.

Sweet J., He's 13. No matter what you recommend he will be bored with it! :) Unless it's the Wii or a racy magazine, I think you're just going to have to be frustrated with him while he figures out what to do with himself. Good luck!

I have just been turned onto this thing called GeoCaching. You go and find hidden treasures all over the area. It gets you outside and takes you to different parts of town and areas....you will need a GPS unit. The website is Geocaching.com Check it out. It's something different and change of pace too. Good luck.