Advice- Excused Absence Ideas Needed- Can't I Just Explain to Them?

Updated on March 13, 2009
A.L. asks from Indianapolis, IN
4 answers

Hello, I am worried because I don't know what to do about my daughters school during her spring break. Initially- we had plans for her to see her daddy- he was aware of her dates of SPRING BREAK, and after consulting with me, he opted to get the tickets that fly back in the day aftetr she is due to be back in school becausre of the huge price difference. I could not let him spend an extra 5oo or 6oo for those days. I figured the school would understand that. The problem is- more recently, we found out that my brother is getting married in another state, and it is very important for us to be there. So we have flights for that occasion, but are only staying 2 days- and the flight back is just in time for the flight out to see her daddy (during her spring break period). I wanted to clear that up, because some of the advice given was as if i had intentionally chose to say at a destination way before and after she excused to be out of school. As if i am staying somewhere for 2 weeks. (what a luxury!) She has had too many missed days form just being sick, and my concern is that there will be a negative reprocussion for both my daughter and myself. Our trip is to see my brother get married out of state, and for my daughter to spend time with her dad in another state- kind of crunching the times together, and not planned at the same time. I have tried to reschedule the days so she misses less, but it will cost way too much money to make changes to our tickets.

Does anyone have any ideas about how to either talk to her school about the trip, or ways that I can get 3 or 4 days excused. I want to just let them know about it and have her homework already done before we leave. If it is a matter of her not being allowed to make up her homework, I don't think that could bring down her high A's, I just don't want her to have to pay the price for circumstances being too close together- and me arranging for what I felt had to be done- at each of the decision times. I would rather not lie, but I don't want to go to court about it either. I want to have a meeting with the teacher and principal and show them the tickets and explain the situation, so they understand this is not some extended vacation plan. That- I think would be pushing the limit, and is unexcusable. But it is different. Maybe they will understand??

I am interested in hearing any ideas you may have, or if you have been through something similar. Of course your input is better if you have children that are school aged, so that you understand this is not a day care/"bubble gum" situation that doesn't really matter. Or, you have knowledge of either being a teacher, or knowing someone who works at an elementary school. Thank you in advance!

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J.S.

answers from Indianapolis on

I say go on your trip and enjoy every minute of it, BUT tell the school the truth and nicely talk to the teacher(s) about getting the work that will be missed. The teacher might not be required to get it early for you (you might need to wait until after your trip), and your daughter may not receive credit for doing it, but it is very important for you to set a good example for your daughter. It is imperative to tell the truth and take responsibility for your actions. Fortunately, your daughter is still young and it should not affect her academic career.

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D.H.

answers from Indianapolis on

Talk to her teacher and try to get her information on what she will miss. Ask the teacher if you could then do those assignments while you are gone, so you would "home school" her for a few days to keep her caught up. You could do that maybe in the evenings, but make sure that you get it done so if she needs to take any test, she can when she gets back. Explain why you need to go.....hopefully that will help.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.T.

answers from Indianapolis on

Next time schedule your trip around the school break so she won't have to miss as much.

Be honest with the school. You can't lie about it because then you are just teaching her it's OK to lie about reasons for missing school and work.

Our son will be missing 2 days of school next month because of a wedding (my husband's brother, our kids are in the wedding) out-of-state. However, it's just 2 days and the school is fine with it because they understand these family events are important and it's not like we set the date. The big difference, I think, is that we are making the trip short (normally when we visit it's for a week at a time). It sounds like you are taking 2 weeks for a wedding (a 1 day event)... I could understand the school not seeing that as a valid excuse.

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K.S.

answers from Indianapolis on

I would just be honest and tell the school that she will be out so many days before spring break and when she will be back from the trip due to a family situation ( you could say).
I wouldnt if she has already been out a lot for being sick, say that she is sick. You are her parent and I cant see how the school could do much - its not like you are keeping her out to keep her out of school.
Good luck

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