Ooo, sorry you heard all of this. I would have had a hard time not saying, "hey guys, he is a team mate, lets keep that in mind. We do not speak like that about other people, unless we do not mind them talking like that about us, "
I agree that you need to help your son understand what it is like to be a good team player. He does not need to be so rough with the other kids.
That includes being respectful of others skills and lack of skills. Sticking up for other team mates (like that boy that stuck up for him).
The coaches are dads and volunteers. Since they did not hear this conversation themselves, may not feel like they can address it, unless they speak specifically to these boys unless you tell them who they are.
They work many hours trying to teach the skills. It would be great if they could also each time at practice mention, being a good team mate. But be careful about making suggestions to volunteers, or you may be put in charge. Maybe ask if you could make up signs for the team with words like.
"Support the players on the field."
"Cheer on your team mates."
" A team works together"
"Play your best, be your best"
You and your husband need to teach your son about the game if he does not understand it. Maybe you all could go and watch some of the older kids play their games. You and your husband can then explain what is happening. Speak with some of the parents and see if any of thier sons would be willing to work with your son and some of the other players on your sons teams on skills this summer.
You and your husband also need to work on the different skills. Give him some confidence. Do not pull him out unless he really, really absolutely hates it.
Being on a team at this age can be difficult for some kids, because there is so much waiting around for each other, but that is part of being on the team. Remind your son that while watching others, he is learning how to be a better player and he is cheering on his team mates.
This is so hard for parents to hear others being mean to our kids, but it is something we need to listen to and then figure out how to make sure our children never act like that towards others. They are only 7. They are still needing to be reminded, they are nto the only people in the world and their words and actions can really hurt someon elses feelings and they never know who is listening.