Behavior Problems at Daycare, Need Help!

Yes, this could be just a phase, but left alone could become a habit. Dad's are very important in kids lives, so that could also be a part of it. I have worked with children for many years. If teachers and parents work together most behaviors can be changed. As kids get more indepentant, it sometimes helps to give them choices. Example: If you choose to throw things you will have 2 choices, to sit in time out or to miss movie time (or something the child really enjoys such as his time on the computer). Until the behavior gets better, a daily chart of his choices may be necessary. Good Morning or not, Good lunch or not, good nap or not, good afternoon or not. Hope some of this helps.

K.,
I have been in your situation years ago. I have a son Bryce, who is now 23 years old and just graduated college and is applying to medical school. At the age of 3, Bryce began getting into trouble at daycare,or preschool, is what we called it. We tried everything.....I highly recommend a book by James Dobson, "The Strong Willed Child" for you to read. He teaches us how to break the childs will without breaking his spirit. From our experiences with Bryce, he was toooooo bored. He was very smart, energetic and really a hand full for most teachers. Keep in mind, some teachers, daycare workers can not handle these type of children. They want children to be quite and perfect. Bryce's behavior always changed from teacher to teacher. He knew what teachers he could misbehave with and those he couldnt. At one time, we acually had to move Bryce to another teacher...and immediatley his behavior changed. There is a reason for this behavior and many times it is because he is bored, smart, and full of energy. This energy has to be controlled or he will continue to get in trouble. Good luck and love him through this. It will get better. Let him know how much his "mommy" loves him.

My daughter exhibited the same behaviors at this age...and I hate to tell you that she wound up with a diagnosis of Sensory Processing Disorder and PDD.

That does not mean that every child who exhibits these behaviours has a developomental disorder, by any means. Some of the symptons of Sensory Processing Disorder and PDD/Autism Spectrum look like behaviour issues. The key is whether or not typical discepline works to correct the behavior.

If not you might need to make yourself aware of the signs and symptoms of developmental disorders so that you can get on top of any such situation, if it does exist.

Some really big warning signs for PDD/Autism include poor eye contact, not responding well when spoken to or his name is called, and repetative behaviors (stimming).

Here are two website for symtom lists,

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/sensory-proces...

and http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/autism/comple...

If you think there is a problem early intervention is critical. Don't let anyone tell you, "just wait and see." Diagnosis can be made by Occupational Therapists and Psychologists. And treatments include therapy and biomedical intervention (called the DAN! protocal) for both conditions. My daughter has received these treatments and at six has recovered.

Good luck and I hope my advice is not needed but the best thing you can do is to at least make yourself aware of the warning signs.

P.

I have the ULTIMATE book. It is called "To Train Up A Child" by Michael and Debi Pearl. It is a quick read b/c it gets right to the point. It will help with every age. I am reading it for the second time, outloud to my husband. If you cannot find it in the store go to NOGREATERJOY.ORG. It deals more with training children. Once I read it a light bulb went off. We train in every aspect of our life, but never thought of training a child. When you train a new employee, you don't just put them infront of the computer and punish them if they hit the wrong key. You need to spend time and put in effort to train them. Same with children.
Try finding out exactly what led up to him being put into a time out. What it usually was with my son was another child took a toy away from him. Then set up a training situation at home. I'm at home now, but it still happens with my daughter taking toys away from him. I will tell him that I am going to play pretend and be his sister. I will let him play with a toy and then I will take it from him. He will of course the first couple of time get upset. Then I will show him the proper responce. If she takes a toy, his is to nicely tell her that it is his and ask for it back. After doing this a several times for a few days, that has now become his new habit and natural responce with her and other children. I have also trained her that if she picks up one of his toys, even if he was not playing with it, and his asks for it back, that she gives it back. It has been so wonderfull.

i 100% agree with debra. and if u and ur hubby think the over night job is bothering ur son talk with ur husband and have a deal with dad snd son as to if he is goood at school dad will take him on his time off to the park or ice cream or something to that extent. maybe that will help but defently stay consistant on his disapline and rewards so he knows exactly what to expect. goood luck...

You say he just turned three.... For both of my daughters we had terrible three's, MUCH worse than two. You have some wonderful suggestions here. But for us, three was really hard. However, right after they turned four the behavior problems went away. I hope this is the case for you.

My daughter is 4, and she used to have these fits like you're talking due to the fact that my husband is in the military and is gone a lot of the time. Her teachers came up with a reward chart that for every 30 minutes or hour she's good she gets a sticker on the chart. And we praise her all the time. As time passes, you can stretch the time lengths out. Hope this helps.

Is it possible for your hubby to have breakfast with you all before he sleeps or even to take your son to day care. Maybe if you can just get a few minutes together it would help.