Behavior Issues - Vineland,NJ

Updated on April 12, 2007
R.B. asks from Vineland, NJ
7 answers

My 7 year old son has constant behavior issues.

He is defiant, rude, talks back, says oddest things at weirdest times.

When he misbehaves he just looks at you for the longest time, not acknowledging what you are saying but just looking at you like who the heck are you talking to.

He has a smart mouth to us at home and at school.

When you punish him he says YAY!

While he is on punishment he loses focus on the fact he is punished within 30 seconds.

He is not intimidated in the least and taking tv, toys, early bedtime, none of these work.

Any advice?

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J.Y.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Some kids respond better to rewards than punishment (though I hate rewarding kids for what they should do). In the mental health area of the hospital I worked in, all privlidges were taken away- TV, video games, computer, games, everything- for a period of time, usually a week, until they could act right, then they could earn these things back. You may need the help of a therapist or psychiatrist. Definitely take care of it before he's a teen!

1 mom found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Allentown on

Wow! You just described my 13yo son!!

It seems like he is angry about something. Has there been a change in your home recently? Maybe something at school? Does he have friends at school or at home?

You may want to consider counseling. Perhaps talking to someone might help him to open up. You might also want to contact your pediatrician and make an appointment to have him checked out about the:
"just looks at you for the longest time, not acknowledging what you are saying but just looking at you like who the heck are you talking to." issue.

It might be that he is having some difficulties with focusing, attention or staying on task. Sometimes, physical problems can cause behaviors like this.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

sounds like my six year old we are doing something different i make him earn everything....for good behavior he gets a mommie dollar....he may cash in mommie dollars for video game time tv time ect one dollars equals 20 mins of time. He may not cash in more then two at any givin time. If he miss behaves there is also a penelty for example if he says a bad word he pays me a mommie dollar etc.. it has been working wonderfully i think because he can physical see that being good pays off. try it it can't hurt. I made the dollars with construction paper.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.V.

answers from Charleston on

Maybe it's the age? My 7 year old son acts exactly the same way!

1 mom found this helpful
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A.S.

answers from Pittsburgh on

If it truly is constant I would be concerned that there is something going on in his life that is not right. Like someone else mentioned, he may be angry about something. If you can't figure it out with him, a visit to the doctor and/or counselor may be in order. If you can't figure out an underlying issue, maybe he is just the type of kid who is really testing you to see what he can get away with and it has worked for him at some point. A really great book for dealing with almost any behavior issue from small to large is Parenting with Love and Logic. They have a website or you can get it at bookstores. They make it for different ages. Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.A.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi R.,

What I have done in the past, is take tv or something that they really enjoy, and tell them that they will have to earn it back. Of course depending on what it was. If they lied to me or talked back to me, they sat in the corner, facing the wall by themselves. If they continued this, then they lost tv for the rest of the day. If it continued the next day, the same punishment would apply. Be consistant. Hope this helps. Good luck!
S.

1 mom found this helpful
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H.S.

answers from Allentown on

dear R.,
in alot of ways this sounds like normal seven year old behavior, but when you speak of him not being able to keep his focus that could mean possible add or adhd you should try talking to his pedatrician and see what they have to say about his behavior. i wish you luck i know i have a nine year old and he's the same way. is your son an only child?sometimes i think my son's behavior stems from the fact that he's an only child and a spoiled one at that.let me know if you ever want to talk. ____@____.com my name is H..again good luck!!!!!!

1 mom found this helpful
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