NEED HELP, Behavior Problem in Carol Stream, IL

Hi K.,
My guess is your little guy really doesn't understand what's about to happen to his little world! Maybe he's reacting to the stress he feels at home because your husband is out of work. More typically, I think his behavior is mimicing the super heroes that he is in to. Try limiting his exposure to those shows/toys and see if that makes a difference. Offer him other alternatives. Boys are physical and they love super heroes, I know! On another note, if your husband would be interested in exploring an opportunity with the #1 nutritional supplement in North America which seems to be recession proof, have him give me a call, ###-###-####.
Good luck. C. D.

Here's an article by James Lehman on hitting:
http://www.empoweringparents.com/GlobalSearchResults.php

My son had the same issue and I have to say the time out worked wonders. Don't get me wrong, it took A LOT of time outs, but I was persistant and it paid off. No matter what we were doing or where we were, if he hit, he got a time out and he finally got the point.

Do you think you are being consistent enough with the time outs? I know with my son, if I slacked even a little, it was like starting over from scratch!

Good Luck!

Hang in there. This may take a while to exterminate and will inevitably resurface. There may be a few different things going on. It is possible that he knows you are pregnant--he sees the changes in you--your routine, the way you are eating, your energy level, discussions with your husband.

Spiderman, etc. may also be an issue. He is not too young to emulate what he sees in these shows.

The possible stress of dad not working may be an issue too. Kids are very perceptive and no matter what we might think we conceal--they can pick up on it.

Also, I have really had to tune in on how sensitive my sons are...I took for granted that some things would roll off them in a different way than my daughters---not so much! At all!

Try setting some time aside for just him and make a BIG deal about it. I mean exaggerate your words, what you will do, etc. He will totally dig this. Talk with him about the new one coming and his feelings about it. Get books at the library to help, etc.

Keep up with the discipline, it sounds like you are doing all the right things and that you are a consentious (sp?), concerned parent...best of luck

From a mom of 6 and former private school director

It's very typical for kids this age to mimic what they see on Television and what they witness other kids doing. My daughter is 3 1/2 and plays with a 5 yr. old boy who is also into Spiderman and other superheroes. She therefor is also interested in playing as he does when they're together. Both need to be reminded that what they see on TV is not necessarily real or what they should do in real life. If your son watches Spiderman, Superman, etc., he may be simply acting out those roles in real life. Kids this age need a lot of repetition to remind them of appropriate behavior. Perhaps if he does watch a lot of cartoons with superheroes fighting the "bad guys", maybe diminishing that might help, also I have no doubt that he is not the only 3 1/2 yr. old hitting others. A good question to ask his daycare is how they're handling the discipline. If what they're doing isn't working, they really need to try something different.

With continual reminders and maybe limiting his cartoon time if you think it's necessary, I'm sure he'll rise to the occasion and start to better understand how to interact more appropriately with his peers.

I hope this helps some. Do take care!

I agree with Kim that you need to stick with it. Also you need to be consistent and do the same thing time after time. Explain to your son that his behavior is not acceptable and if he hits, he will get a time out and then give him one.

Something to think about is day care. Is there something there that is bothering him? Is he overwhelmed there? What are they doing for discipline when he misbehaves? Do you think that's the right place? We had better luck when we moved our son to a smaller setting after he got kicked out for biting.

Another thing to think about is what he is watching on tv. When my oldest was young, he liked Power Rangers, but the Power Rangers hit and kick and he started doing that to me and his brothers. So I wouldn't let him watch it and it helped.

Stick with it. It will get better.

M.

What about a chart with stickers? If the day care supports this as well he can get praised/rewarded daily from day care and home. Any teacher store has sticker charts and stickers. Let's Learn in Schaumburg I know has what you would need.