11 Year Old Boys

Updated on January 29, 2013
D.P. asks from Sacramento, CA
11 answers

I am just curious at things other 11 year old boys have done. My 11 almost 12 year old decided last night while he was taking a shower, in my shower, that he would shave the hair off his upper lip! He came downstairs with a little cut on his lip. I asked him why he did it, if he was embarrassed because he had a bit of a hairy upper lip (both my kids are pretty hairy, heck we are quite a hairy family!) His response was he didnt know why, he just wanted to try it. He also has been wearing the same pants almost everyday as well as his favorite pull over sweatshirt! He does have other clothes, but these are his absolute favorite! I even bought him another pair of the same jeans, exact samy style, size everything, but they fit him a lot bigger (weird). So my question, if you have had or do have an 11 year old boy, has he done anythinglike try to shave and does he always want to wear the same clothes? ETA: We did talk to him about the shaving incident. His father, my husband, is in the picture, he took our son back upstairs to finish the job that he had started! My son wasnt embarrassed or anything he was giggling along with us! We did take it seriously and have been having a lot of conversations lately about the changes his body is going through. We keep it lite and fun to decrease the embarrassment he may have! As for his clothes, he does like to wear pretty much the same thing daily, but I make sure it is clean, not allowed to leave house dirty and especially no leaving smelly.

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answers from Washington DC on

You honestly don't know why a young man going through puberty would want to shave his first whiskers?

It just seems like a normal type of thing. The only thing suprising about this is that you seem caught off guard by it.

1 mom found this helpful

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answers from Beaumont on

I had to smile at your post...just a boy being a boy as far as I can see. Gotta love 'em...

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Columbia on

These are normal behaviors.

Regarding clothes: My 11 year old will change his clothes each day for school, but on the weekend, if I don't remind him, he'll wear the same thing all weekend.

My 10 year old would wear the same dirty jeans every day if I allowed it.

My rule is that once it looks/smells dirty, it is to be washed before wearing again. I don't care if he wears his outfit every day as long as it's clean.

BUT...he's not allowed to wash ONE outfit and have that be the only thing in the load of laundry, because that's wasteful. So if he wants to wear that dirty outfit, he has to wash a full load, start to finish, and fold it, and put it all away. The amount of work involved usually outweighs his desire to wear the outfit again, and he finds something else.

Regarding shaving: This is something his dad or another father figure needs to address. He's growing and recognizing that other boys at school are maturing. As a mom, I would probably say "Well, son, when you start to mature from a boy into a young man, your hair thickens. Other stuff happens too. You should talk to your dad about when he started shaving so he can teach you to do it safely, okay?" Then leave it alone. This is a man-to-man talk, in my opinion.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from San Diego on

At 11 my son pretty much rotated between two different sweat pants. I had other chothes but he would only wear those two pants. Now, he only wears black shorts and shirts. He'll grow out of the one pair of pants soon, and I wouldn't worry about it. My son is now 13 and he just now has the lip thing going and is rather proud of it so I don't know what I would do, but I think I would talk to him and maybe have your husband or a male influence teach him how to shave. Have his own razor and everything. The other option is waxing, but I don't know how he'd feel about that.

Good luck!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Norfolk on

At about that age my son started shaving his lip - not often - maybe once every month or so.
His hair is coming in and it makes his lip look dirty.
Make sure he has his own safety razor.
Wash the favorite clothing once a week.
Wash the new stuff too so it's harder to tell one from the other.
They get into clothing ruts but eventually they'll want to try a new look.
This is typical for approaching middle school or in middle school and sometimes even in to high school too.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

I don't have 11 year old boys but I work in Middle School (12-14 year olds). The sweatshirts! There are many boys who love their hooded sweatshirts and wear the same darn one every day. Its like you can recognize the kid by their sweathsirt- "you know Tom, the one who wears the blue and gray stripes?" I haven't figured out what it is, I think it's just a security, comfort thing. Like a security blanket almost. And boys just really don't seem to care about wearing the same thing every day, unlike a girl.
The pants I haven't noticed but I bet a lot of them are doing that too. Thats something probably only a mom would really notice.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

Oh yeah! You ain't seen notin yet!

I raised boys and have been around a lot of boys. I came from a family of girls, my sis had a family of girls. Then God had a sense of humor and gave me boys! I didn't know what to do with them at first. Now, I love them!
They do funny stuff that girls never would! They also don't carry grudges, which I love.

Within this set of boys I have known have been a few that wouldn't change clothes. Part of it is pure laziness! Part, they just don't care. Part nobody stopped them. But if your boy is shaving in the shower, he has hit the stage where he has noticed that some people DO care. Especially those pretty ones! He should be changing his clothes more now.

This is where your H needs to step in or if he is not in the picture,you have to step up to the plate. He doesn't know how to shave. Dad needs to be Johnny on the spot and go out with him and buy him a dedicated razor and anything he likes to go with it. They need instruction on how to do it and when to do it. When it gets too long it hurts!
You need to be taking him with you to shop. I know thats pulling teeth but make him go. Make him change clothes. Nobody else wants to smell that.

You are helping him through an embarrassing time of life. Sometimes you gently tell him, gently teach him or just insist. It depends.

Good Luck!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Boston on

Thank you.....

I too have an 11 year old and , well, I hear you

Mine tried to give himself a hair cut one day and well, um,.....

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Jacksonville on

My son (he's 14) has a few favorite items, and always has. He has always been pretty particular about the way they feel on his body. Now, at teen, he is also conscious of how they LOOK. LOL

The ones he liked wearing (comfort reasons, not usually sweats either... but soft tagless shirts, or jeans usually, favorite socks, etc) he pulls out of the laundry the instant they are done and wears them at the next clothes change. On weekends, he'd put the same clothes on at age 10 or 11.

As far as the identical jeans you bought, I'm not surprised they don't fit the same. For one, I have picked up identical jeans off the shelf at a store (exact same fit/cut, etc) and tried them on in the dressing room and they fit differently. Some of that may be that someone else has tried on one of the pairs and one hasn't been previously tried on. But, #2, washing/drying over and over can change the size of the actual garment. Stuff shrinks.

Try washing and drying the new pair a few extra times and see if they fit a little better?
And yes, take him shopping with you and listen to what he says he likes. I have to do that with my daughter. If I buy it solo, she may not like it, and if she doesn't, she WON'T wear it. She is 11, but has been like this for a few years now.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

At least he wants to shave. My 15yo son loves his hairy lip. Yuck.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Phoenix on

Hi Sassy, my 10 yo has not tried to shave, but our kids have their own bathroom and there are not any razors in there for him to get to.

He also has not worn the same clothes over and over. However, my 13 yo daughter does! She even SLEEPS in them, which I don't fight her about but my husband hates. lol She showers in the morning so I just have to TELL her she can't wear the same thing she did yesterday and she will reluctantly say, "ok".

Just ask your son if the hair on his lip is bothering him. And at this age, at least my kids, try to get away with doing the easiest thing possible (quick showers, if at all, not brushing their teeth, wearing the same clothes, etc) so I think that is normal for tweens. =)

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