My 13 month old will not go to sleep peacefully. I've been allowing her to cry it out. Sometimes I feel awful for this. She screams at the top of her lungs with tears and the whole water works. How can I get her to go to sleep without the fuss???? Help me please.
I would like to thank everyone for their input. She is now allowing me to lay her down with little to no fuss. I am thankful for the support and suggestions.
I think the "crying it out" method may work for some children, and not for others. If it is going to work, it usually works fairly quickly. This should not be going on and on. This was not an option for my oldest child, as every time we did this he vomited all over his bed every time. He is now 11 and still has sleep problems, these problems could not be solved in that manner. Good Luck, you may want o mention this to your doctor.
M.,
I'm not big on letting them cry it out. We coslept, so it wasn't ever an issue. But as they got older they learned they had to sleep in their own beds. Often I would take a book and sit right outside the door or I would sing to them from right outside the room. I let them know I was there, but they were not going to get out of bed. Some babies are self-soothers, and some are not. It sounds like your little girl isn't. You may need to stay in the room with her for a whild after you put her down to assure her she isn't alone. Does she have a special lovey? Do you have a bedtime routine designed to soothe and calm and prepare her for sleep?
Good luck!
I don't know if she has been sleeping in the past or if this is a new problem that has come about. Is she teething? Or have you had any major changes lately? You may want to check out this website www.sleeplady.com, it has some great tips and there is also a book you can buy that goes into greater detail. I have a 9 month old and we have been using this method and it seems to have worked although now we seem to be having other problems during the night (gas). It is a gentler method than crying it out. You start out by the crib and every 3 days work your way further out of the room. The book can be bought at local bookstores. Check out the website first! Good luck!
There are times we still go through this with my son and he is around 20 months. They enjoy playing or being w/us and do not want to go to sleep. I think the big question is how long she cries ... it feels like forever, but usually after 5 minutes, he quiets ... and the longest is 15 minutes. If it goes on longer, I do step in the room to hug him and tell him it is okay, which seems to help ... but I don't take him out of the crib. Something funny my husband will do is say goodnight to his stuffed animals and blankets. It cracks up my son and then he snuggles under the covers. Good luck ...
Hi M.,
I had the same problem for my son, we co-slept for a few months, and then got him to sleep in the crib, but he would never go to bed by himself, I had to rock him to sleep and try not to disturb him when I laid him down, if I did he was up for another couple hours until finally around midnight he would fall asleep exhausted.
I ended up using ideas from the book "Good Night, Sleep Tight" by Kim West. It is a method from "the Sleep Lady" who has this great method to get your kids to fall asleep on their own and sleep all night long. It took us about a week and a half, and the crying went from 45 minutes to 15 minutes within 3 days, and after that it was just getting him to sleep.
Her method is basically, comfort them from next to the crib but do not take them out, until they fall asleep. stay next to the crib for a few days until they fall asleep faster, then gradually move away from the crib when you comfort (using your voice) until you are in the doorway, and by then they should be falling asleep with no problems. It is much easier if you have a routine before putting them to bed, like a bath and some stories.
Good Luck!
Hi M.:
My son was almost 2 before he would go to sleep peacefully. We use to rock him to sleep everynight. When we lay him down he would scream and attempt(sometimes with success) to climb over the crib. As the other mothers suggested. We stopped rocking him to sleep. We would lay him in his crib, kiss him, rub his back for a little while and leave. He would cry for maybe 30 min. We would go back in the room not take him out of his bed to reassure him he is ok. It took maybe a week for him to learn to go to sleep on his own. GOOD LUCK...This is a tought one.
PATIENCE!! LOL Just keep letting her cry it out. If you give in...even once, you'll will be telling her that she can have her way. If she learns that it only takes her screaming for 30 minutes to get your attention, then you can be sure that she will be screaming for that entire 30 minutes. Yes, your heart strings will break but you'll both be better for it in the long run. She'll eventually learn that her screams will get her no where.
