Potty Training - San Ramon, CA

Updated on May 05, 2009
J.M. asks from San Ramon, CA
10 answers

Hello everyone,

I have been potty training my 3 yr old for 5 days now and he is doing wonderfully, and I couldn't be more happy. We have had only 1 or 2 accidents a day, including through the night. My problem is I go back to work on Wed and my sitter told me that he needs to be potty trained for 3 weeks before he can wear underwear to her house. So, when he goes to her house he needs to be in pull ups until then. My concern is that it will cause him to slid backwards when he realizes he can just go potty in the pull up versus wetting all his clothes. Has anyone else had this experience? Do they tend to regress when in pull ups versus underwear? Any advice or words of encouragement welcome to calm my concerns. :)

Thank you all for taking the time to read and respond.

J.

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L.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Maybe you can put him in big boy underwear and have pull ups or those plastic pants over them? Otherwise I think he'd regress. See if the caregiver can work with you a bit or she's going to be changing diapers for a lot longer!

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C.M.

answers from Chico on

Wow! I cannot beleive that your daycare is not supporting you and your son in his potty training efforts. This is one of the many thing that you PAY the daycare for!!

It is very hard for children to be successful in Pull Ups because they DO realize that they have the convenience and dryness of a diaper. What about requesting your daycare assist and suppor you by allowing him to use the cloth training pants? Cloth diaper companies make some wonderful training pants that do not leak and would help your son realize when he has wet. The daycare would only need to change the insert pad and put the wet inserts into a large plastic baggie for you to take home and wash in the evening. Your daycare SHOULD be supporting this effort!!

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K.M.

answers from Chico on

Rather than pull-ups which feel like a diaper will your sitter allow cotton training pants (like the thick Gerber ones) with a vinyl pull on cover over top? That way he'd feel the wetness of the cotton fabric but his clothes would be protected by the vinyl underpants. Sounds like he's doing well with the potty learning, hope it continues to go smoothly. Best Wishes, K.

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

Dear Jen,
Congratulations on potty training going so well!
Is this a brand new baby-sitter or someone who has been taking care of your son all along? I do know that many daycares will refuse to take children who aren't fully potty trained, but what the heck is the sense in making your son wear pull-ups at her house? If he has an accident, it will still have to be dealt with.
I did daycare and I had one little boy from birth until he was 5 years old and we moved away. I'm the one who potty trained him. He was with me all day, every day and he'd have been trained a lot sooner except his mother still had him in diapers at 4 years old at home. I loved her dearly, but the fact is, it was easier for her to slap a diaper on him than set him on the toilet.
My point is, parents and the sitter need to work together, especially if it's someone that's had your child for a while or is willing to deal with a pull-up. I am strongly, adamantly opposed to pull-ups. It's diapers or underwear, that's it. (That's my opinion, anyway). All kids will have accidents, but having an accident in their underpants is what helps them learn NOT to have accidents in their underpants.
I would talk to your sitter again about it and tell her you don't think making him wear pull-ups is the solution when your son is doing so fabulously. (You may already be doing this, but while your son is getting the hang of using the toilet, put him in sweatpants so there are no snaps, buttons, or zippers to deal with and he can easily get his pants up and down, in a hurry, if he needs to). Agree to send a couple of extra sets of clothing for him and send some small garbage bags that she can just throw the icky stuff in and you'll deal with it at home. (I always washed and dried everything which wasn't expected of me, but shoot, with a bunch of kids, somebody was going to get something soggy, either top or bottom. I just had extra clothes for everybody).
See if there is something you can work out with her. Your son already has 1 week down. If she won't budge, maybe you can find someone else to watch him until her 3 week requirement is fulfilled. I would suggest the plastic pants that could fit over his underwear, but that just kind of reinforces the "baby" thing when your son is working so hard to be a big boy.
I wouldn't want to set him back at this point.
I really hope you can work something out with her and if not, get something else worked out.
The main thing is for your little guy to know what a great job he's doing!
Very best of wishes!

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R.G.

answers from Sacramento on

As long as the sitter is willing to continue to work with your son and be consistent about it you should be fine. The problems arise when there is no consistency and the child regresses. Just be sure to communicate on a daily basis with the sitter. it may be a good idea to give her an update when you drop him off and get an update when you pick him up.
And don't forget to communicate with your soon too. Remind him that big boys have to go in the Potty and to tell someone if he needs help going potty. Communication is key.

Good luck.

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D.H.

answers from Fresno on

Yes I think they regress when pull ups are used!!! I used them for maybe a week and decided that I would just stick to panties because I saw her back tracking. Hope this is somewhat helpful! I know its hard when a sitter is involved! Good luck!!!

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M.K.

answers from Chico on

I haven't had this experience (of having to be trained for a certain amount of time), but my son would pee in the pull ups when I tried them, so I think your concern is valid. What if he wears the pull up or cloth diapering cover over his regular big boy underwear? Or maybe you could have someone babysit him in your home for the next couple of weeks if that is an option. Good luck!

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M.L.

answers from Redding on

He may regress a bit. What would work best is if his sitter makes him go to the bathroom every hour so he stays drained out and doesn't have anything in him to pee into his pull ups. Just try to keep him in underwear as much as you can. You may want to give a small award for going the whole day without needing to change pull ups.

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B.R.

answers from Bakersfield on

Pull ups have never worked, the kids think of them as diapers and just pee in them. I'm sorry but I think your sitter is being unreasonable. Maybe if you put him in his big boy underwear and some plastic pants over the top. But mainly your sitter is going to have to have him go potty regularly, it's part of her job to help with this process. If she is unwilling to participate in this, you might have to find someone else for childcare until he is fully potty trained or from now on. Generally kids have accidents once in awhile, especially the first couple of weeks but then it gets better and the accidents taper off. Every child is going to have an accident once in awhile though, and if this is going to be a problem with your sitter I'd re-evaluate my childcare if I were you. Good luck!

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J.H.

answers from Sacramento on

I say no to the pull ups. Find another way. Also, when my son was learning, we had to constantly remind him to go potty. He didn't like it, but we just told him that when he didn't go potty in his pants, we would stop reminding him. Also, when he went in his pants, he had to clean it up. It took my son about 2 weeeks to be potty trained once we all were on board about it.

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