Postponing a Baby Shower, Need Help with Wording

I can't think of any fun ways to tell people that it's postponed. I know I have a friend that did a see and sip party. It was where they got to see the baby and sip some wine. Are the invitations already out? if so maybe send out Change the Date cards instead of save the date card or emails.

I think that, in the case of a hospitalization and a pregnancy that requires such careful monitoring, that "clever" and/or "cute" are not appropriate.

Whoever is in charge of planning the shower, whether it's you or your family or friends, need to simply inform all invited guests that in the best interest of the mother-to-be and the baby's health, a shower will be postponed. Most people would understand that a shower or party for a woman who's been in the hospital might not be the best idea at the present time.

This is a time for caring, not cute words, in my opinion.

I'd be honest and straightforward. Something like "[mother's name] has been recently hospitalized and we're happy to say that the baby is in stable health right now. But in order to help [mother's name] get all the rest she needs during the last trimester, we'll postpone the shower until after the baby's safe arrival."

I'm sorry you are going through this. My stepdaughter was in this situation, and those weeks in the hospital really were a cross between boring and worrisome. I know you are looking for things to do, but taking over your own baby shower isn't one of them. It's just bad form to throw your own party anyway, and trying to make "I'm bleeding and on complete hospitalization" sound clever or cute is not going to come of as anything but insulting to the guests. If you belittle the risk of the situation, it sounds like you don't care about their schedules. So you have to handle this as the health emergency that it is - even if you are stable now.

So put this right back in the hands of the friend or relative who is serving as the shower planner/hostess - give her a head's up if you haven't already, and have a contingency plan for a "meet the baby" event after the birth. If the shower is at a restaurant or someplace that required a deposit, have the shower planner talk to the management about a refund policy and what amount of notice is required. If there's any doubt, just cancel it now and look into alternative locations that you are likely to be able to get on short notice. Be flexible about where you can hold this. If you are having so many people that few venues will hold it, then it really needs to be rethought overall.

I don't see that sending cards makes sense - if you take time to print cards, address envelopes, and mail them, you're depriving the guests of reasonable notice about the change in plans, and there's no way to make that seem anything but rude and insensitive to them. I know you are trying to be cute - but you can't make a medical situation and an at-risk pregnancy sound adorable.

I think who ever is hosting the shower for you should make personal phone calls telling your guest that the shower will be delayed until after the arrival of the baby.

Best of luck with the remainder of your pregnancy. I sincerely hope you can go home and have an uneventful pregnancy here on out.

I would have whoever is throwing it cancel it until after baby is born.

Good news. Apart from a car seat, diapers, a safe place to lay his head and some simple onesies a baby doesn’t need anything. The rest is all window dressing. If your friends and family are intent on showering you that’s fine. Meet the baby can be h*** o* both the new mother and the new baby.

Maybe an hour and a half at a cafe with cake and tea in the afternoon after the baby is a month or so and fit to be in public.

Best
F. B.

Normally someone else hosts your shower, and it would be that person's responsibility to plan the shower.

However, it sounds as if you're hosting your own shower. If you've invited guests already, call or email them and tell that you need to postpone the shower. No meet to come up with something cute or clever.

If you haven't sent the invites, then just wait and send out 'meet the baby' later,

I would hope that whoever is hosting the shower would take care of this for you, you have enough going on right now not to worry about that!
Take care of yourself, and ask your host to let everyone know what's going on. The shower will happen when it happens.
ETA: I'm not sure about chacha's response. I've been to many, many baby showers and the mommy to be was always present (sometimes it was after the birth if it was a difficult pregnancy.) The whole point of the shower is to SHOWER the mother with love and gifts. That would be like going to a bridal shower with no bride!

A.

Welcome to mamapedia! Congratulations on your pregnancy.

So you are hosting your own baby shower? Okay. That's fine. Stop looking for a clever way to say something and just say it. Stop beating around the bush.

Wait until after the baby is born. Then have a "Meet the baby" party. Don't be cute. Don't be clever. Just tell people what is going on and wait until AFTER the baby is born. It will be MUCH easier that way.

even if you are hosting your own baby shower, which is weird, you should have a friend take this over for you. a high risk pregnancy is nothing to take lightly.

have a friend contact the people on your guest list. don't insist on clever or cute. this is not the time for clever or cute.

i hope your pregnancy progresses with no further complications.
khairete
S.

the host of the shower should worry about this not you.
i have been to a baby shower when mom was hospitalized and even though it was an all women event the dad showed up instead
so if you cannot make it i think it would be ok for your babys father to step in for you.

You need to "rethink your thinking" here.

*You* will not personally be postponing anything. The host of the party is free to postpone OR NOT, as she chooses. And the host would be the one to send any communications about that.

(I was a guest at a baby shower where the mother was in the hospital - we all gathered with gifts for her, took lots of fun photos to send to her, and called her briefly to say hello from the group. And then we saw her and the baby at other events after the birth.)

ETA: I understand mamazita's point. But it was a situation where young ladies hosting had non-refundable money at stake. Point is, just to let the host decide if she can reasonably cancel.

ETAA: "The doctor says 'there's so much bleeding', now that's more important than the gifts I'm needing! Shower has been rescheduled to X date. [heart emoji]"

You throw your own baby shower?
Your host can deal with it - you need to let this go and let someone else handle it.
You're job is to have a healthy pregnancy/delivery/baby.
Worrying about a shower is not something you need to be fussing about.

Maybe I'm not reading this correctly ...

When is your shower scheduled to be? Is it already in the works - and you're looking for a way to word it to the guests who have already been invited? Or are you looking at a way to word a 'Meet the baby' arrival shower?

If it's the second, then I would Google ideas on Arrival showers - they are usually worded in such a way as "Celebrate our new bundle of joy (baby's name)" kind of thing.

I'm guessing though, someone has planned a baby shower for you and you're wondering how to postpone this for now. Could you ask the person who is hosting this to call the people? That's what I would do.

However, you're saying to send 'cards' so I'm not really following. You don't need to explain though, if you haven't already invited them - there's no need. I would not get into specifics. I would just hold off on sending invites - period, until after the baby arrives. Usually showers that are held after baby's arrival are about a month after the birth to give mom time to recuperate, and to make sure baby is not in newborn stage (since guests will want to visit with/or see baby).

Congratulations and I wish you a safe and happy pregnancy :)

I think trying to come up with a cute/clever saying for this is not the right time. This is serious. Personally, the person who is hosting your shower should be taking care of this. You should be focusing on you and baby. Be healthy!

Wait... Are YOU planning your own baby shower? Isn't that up to the person hosting?

Thanks everyone for the practical advice.

One of my sisters had complications with her first pregnancy and was ordered on bed rest at around 28 weeks. Once we knew that a shower was out of the question (she lives out of state and would have traveled 4+ hours by car to attend if she had been healthy) we, as the hosts, called everyone and let them know. We hadn't sent out invites yet but people knew that plans were in the works. She opted to not have a post-birth gathering as the delivery was very stressful and included a NICU stay, so people just shopped from her registry and had gifts shipped. My other sister and I had already blocked off the weekend of her shower so we went to visit instead and helped her husband get things set up at their home.

Whoever is coordinating your shower should get the message out that the celebration will be postponed (if it is). It's not something you should have to worry about.

I wish you the best and hope the rest of your pregnancy is uneventful!