Need Ideas to Motivate 3.5 Yr Old Son with Potty Training, Specifically Going #2

My son had the very same issues...what worked for him was to run around with no pants on! When I knew he was getting close to needing to go #2, I'd take the pants off, and he'd run off and play as usual. But he didn't like the idea of pooping on the ground, so he'd run straight for the potty when it was time! After doing this several days in a row, we were able to keep his pants on and had great results. Good luck, and hang in there - it will click for him soon!

I read an article in the newspaper recently that said to feed your child a high fiber breakfast and stick him in the bathroom. He stays there until he poops. No reward for going, don't make a big deal about it, just let him out when he goes. I have a friend who tried it with her 3 year old and it worked in 45 minutes. Now he has no problem!

Good luck!

The only thing that worked for my 1st son is going to the ER. He was so constipated that he couldn't go pee. After experiencing that he no longer holds it in.

I am sorry I can't really help. Good luck!

Have a GREAT week!

S.

There are several things you can do...just depends on how resilient you are.

First let him sit in it for a while when it become seriously uncomfortable...he'll stop.

Second...put him back in diapers. This (if he has friends) will humiliate him out of poopin' his pants.

Third...how about lettin' someone else try to potty train him??? Sometimes a different influence works better than our own.

Fourth...have you tried the potty training books??? Those are great and funny! You'll be entertained while he is learning. These books are great kept @ the potty chair only. Give him some readin' material...he's like ANY male...(BIG smile) he might develope the habit of readin' in the potty...but who cares??? He's gonna accomplish two things...Goin' where he should...AND become a good reader. Both are goals you want him to succeed in.

I realize that the first two suggestions seem a wee bit harsh...but they are proven to work. My own son was a piece of cake to potty train. However I have friends who struggled and were so weary by the time it worked...they were at a point of they didn't care any longer. When their boys DID get it...they threw a party!!! LMAO

Those first two also were suggested by Dr.'s. You just watch and make sure he doesn't get a "diaper" rash and he'll soon be uncomfortable enough that he'll stop goin' in his pants and do the correct way.

I had to come back and add this...(after readin' other responses).

I too used the Hot Wheels/MatchBox cars as incentive.
What we did was when we went shopping (they sell those EVERYWHERE)if he told me when he had to go...and REALLY had to go...he got a car. There are SO many cars out there that you can go for ages without duplicating them. I really have NO qualms about spendin' $1 a store if it means no soiled clothes. You just limit the number of stores you go to.

I believe we STILL have all those cars (he's now 16 soon to be 17) and I won't give them away or sell them. His kid too will need to be potty trained some day.

Good luck and keep your chin up.

I have two thoughts - a wise preschool teacher told me that a lot of potty training deals with gross motor control - so if you think his issue is physical more than mental - get him outside, running around, riding bikes etc.

The second thought - my son had similar issues. I got fed up with all the "positive reinforcement" solutions and felt we needed some "negative" consequences. My son was enjoying the one-on-one attention of the clean-up process so we made it his responsibility. Earlier this might not work but at 3.5 he'll be fine. Give him a box of wipes and a grocery sack and tell him that you will check up on him in a few min. Leave the room. Come back in a few and ask him if he feels clean - yes, Great!, no? I'll be back in a few min.

Also, depending on your finances, you can pitch the dirty underwear. He may not care if Mickey gets dirty but would he care if Mickey gets thrown out?

I hope this helps! I feel your pain. . . .I was sooooo tired of cleaning up poop! but it did happen eventually! Now I'm working with my second - we'll see how it goes!

First off, he may not have the brain to poop muscle connected yet. So my first question is: does he recognize that he is about to go poop, but ignores the signs? Next, take him to the store to find something that he really wants. If it is a large ticket item, than create a chart for him to earn the item. If it is small, than adjust what he has to do.

When my now 5 year old was about 3 years old. I tried to get him to do anything on the toilet with no success. I told him as soon as he would go, then I would buy him a toy...no luck. One day I was at Walmart and he was begging for a match box car (his favorite kind of toy). For me it clicked. I let him purchase 5 cars ($5 total). I then took them home, he was so mad because I wouldn't let him have the toys. I pointed out that if he would poop on the potty he could have one. He pooped twice that day. He was pooping so often that he was causing problems (it was pretty funny even at the time). But he was trained pretty quick. So I started out giving him a car every time he pooped, then I moved it to getting one every day that he stayed clean. To every week. And then I quit buying them and he was perfect. I think it cost me a total of $30. But I also had consequences. I started out, if he had any accidents, then he had to give me a car...well he started giving me some of his older cars (it was pretty cute of him). But it didn't mean anything to him, until I started taking away the most recent car that he had gotten. That made him very mad....and it worked. He didn't like me taking his "cool" cars, so he quit having accidents.

Good luck. Every child is different. What works for one won't work for the other. My second child is so competitive that as soon as she was 2 and realized her big sister didn't wear diapers...she trained her self.

Leave it alone for a while. The more you push the harder it will become as it turns into a power struggle. Start first by posting what "big boys get to do", have it be like 15 more minutes added to staying up, a cool big boy toy, cool new underwear. Just be matter of fact and state, when you are ready to be a big boy you let me know.
For my son the great motivator was a transformer, I was very clear they were for big boys only, that when he was going on the potty every time himself he could go pick one out, it took two weeks!!
All kids have something that motivates him. If he doesn't care, then leave it alone, with gentle reminders of the priviledges that come with being a big boy.
If you know of when he goes or close to that time, put him on the potty, set a timer around that time and set him on it. You don't have to force it however tell him he needs to just try and if he doesn't go that is fine.
Do it on the big potty, I cannot stand potty chairs as then it is a whole different transition for them to a big potty. Get a cool seat cover for the big potty if you don't have one.
Then if he doesnt' want to, say Okay. He is pulling out the power card because he controls the situation, but you cannot force him either. If he is headed to school next year let him know he has to be potty trained like his friends.
NOW, for my daughter, it was one phone call from Santa and she was 100% trained! No joke. So if he has a favorite character, have someone outside like family member or friend call him on the phone and talk it up how proud they would be.

I like the transformer idea, with my son we went shopping together an he picked out three toys her REALLY wanted! (just happened to be action figures) when we got home I tacked them high up on his bedroom wall for him to look at and drool over. I made a chart with places for 5 stickers and told him that every time he went to the bathroom in the potty he got a sticker, and when the chart was full, he got the first toy. For the second toy he needed 10 stickers, and for the third it was 15 or 20. When he had earned all three, he was trained. Good luck!

Whatever you read...my son peed, no problem. #2 was a different matter. Someone suggested that we drape a diaper
under the toliet seat so it doesn't "drop" into the toliet.
That it's still contained. Sounds crazy, but it worked. Also, he was due to move into a pre-school with 3-4 yr olds & we made it clear that in order to go to that class with the "big kids" he had to poop in the potty. It worked. Good luck...don't worry so much! your stress adds to his stress.
He won't go to high school not potty trained, I can guarantee that much...LOL

I read a bit of the book "Potty Training in a Day". She addressed a lot of issues related to potty training and had a great sense of humor in it all. I wonder if something in there might work? GL!