Different Behavior

Updated on April 16, 2007
S.P. asks from Helena, MT
6 answers

My youngest son is very bright and has always gotten good marks on his report cards. He usually gets all stars on his manners, following school rules, following classroom rules. This marking period, he didn't. He got all check marks. That means those things are area's of concern. I want to talk to the teacher and plan too after spring break. My cousin made me think of something. I wonder if something happened to him to make him more ornery. He's acting up at home too. Nothing has changed in our household, that I know of. I wonder if his big brother is causing him more stress. Is there anything else I can do to try to fix this problem.
Or should I even worry? It was only one marking period.

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So What Happened?

Thank you everyone for your responses. I talked to his teacher on Monday and she said that my little one is hanging out with the wrong kids. Not that they are bad but the four of them make trouble, mine included. They just start fighting and Aaron can't handle the teasing. He's not really breaking the rules, just can't control his crying. There are some things going on at home too, so we are doing family therapy. He's doing better this week.

More Answers

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J.M.

answers from Des Moines on

First, talk to the teacher. See if she's see any altercations with other kids, or maybe she changed the classroom set up. It could be spring fever.

1 mom found this helpful
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A.R.

answers from Omaha on

You should check into it before it gets worse. He might just need some sun rays. I know that my kids get worse during the winter months but once they run off energy and get some sunshine they are fine.

See if the teacher changed sitting arrangements in the classroom as well. There may be someone next to him he doesn't get along with...

1 mom found this helpful
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B.S.

answers from Rapid City on

Dear S.
My nephew just had the same thing happening to him.He was geting good grades , then they stoped , the teacher said that he started acting up in school , and at home to.They started leting him see a school counsler.Sometimes it is easier to talk to someone they don"t know.It has helped him so far.With young kids , it is hard to figure out what is wrong.I hope this helps.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.C.

answers from Omaha on

Hi S.!
Both your boys are in different growing stages. Could very well be something as simple as exploring his boundaries. The only way you'll know what's up with him is to spend some special time with him. Have a mother/son day just with him. Fool around, hang out, do something that requires energy. Then when you break for lunch/snack, whatever, CASUALLY ask how it's been going at school, with his friends, etc...try not to overload the conversation. Just ask an innocent question. You'll be able to tell if he's being honest with you by the way he reacts. Then, whether or not you get the answers you want, go on and finish your special day with him as if the conversation didn't take place. This will open doors to communication in the future. Or, if you think he'd open up to Daddy, send the two of them on a special day. Either way, everyone wins. Each of your sons will be spending a super cool day with either Mom or Dad and won't be having to share the attention with Brother. Always works here with ours...Hope it helps! Oh! And DEFINATELY talk to his teacher. You don't have to wait for any special reason, just call her up and ask when a good time is for you to come in. Teachers are a valuable source in knowledge where your kids are concerned. Hang in there!! You love your kids and it shows!!

Just Me!
S.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.B.

answers from Sioux Falls on

Kids are a blessing, but sometimes you have to wonder. (I too am a worry-wart, in fact my nickname by my dad was wart lol) Sometimes when there is a change in behavior like this, it can mean there is a serious problem, and if that is the case, try hard not to push him into telling, but do drop some hints that if he has a problem, you are there to listen. Talking to the teacher will help too, but that doesnt always mean she knows too, so maybe ask her to talk to a few of his friends to see if maybe he is being bullied on the playground or something like that and is afraid to tell anyone. However, some other signs that this could be serious, like bullying or other stuff, would be lax of interest in eating or trouble sleeping, if your son doesnt have any of these, then it could just be he is testing you to see how you will react. If he is, then talk to his doctor as to what the next best thing will be to do. Talking to your older son might help too, and ask him to help you look out for your younger son, if you think he would. I know for a fact that older siblings may not always act like they get along, but will be very protective. I hope its nothing, just some cabin fever, and Good Luck!!

1 mom found this helpful
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A.S.

answers from Boise on

I only have one son, but he too is very bright; the school has finally validated. You may want to request a behavioal assessment for your child;it is at no charge to you. If he has high marks and is ONLY SHOWING THAT he is bored beyond what behavioral standards in a school setting will toletate you may want to concider pushing for IQ testing and behavioral testing which may lead to more after school program options and or GATE for him thus oyu may see a decline in his"behvioal issues". He may just be bored.
I personally hold very little clout to the "social report- card" aspect of a student's quartly achievment report. I feel it is the teacher's passive agressive way of shamming a parent... The parent feels guilt if the marks are nothing less than perfact, ys know what I maen; PERFACT A+'s, MEETS or EXCEEDS expectations accross the board, etc.. etc... So when it comes to "social behavior" the school treats the psychology ( behavior traits int he child) the same... sort of a psychological warefare if you may.... IF a school is allows to grade a child's behavior, the theory holds that a parent will be forced into being a part of the child's school day, the parent is then made to feel guilt and fustration if his/her child is getting "bad merits" on his/or her behavior report card. See the nasty cycle of emotion it creates. I say we demand the schools take out the aspect of the quartly report card that emphisizes on social skills. Oh, still make it an important goal but not one that is necessarly needing to be graded upon.

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